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Whenever I address someone it their workplace (cashier, stock boy, business owners, etc) I always "thank you sir/ma'am" whether they are 18 or 80. I've always done that. No one has ever acted as though they were offended.
I've gotten more used to it b/c around here it's got nothing to do with age, all men are Sir & all women are Ma'am.
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Originally Posted by Mikala43
I think the term "miss" should be put to bed, and all women called "m'am" (if anything), because it no longer matters whether or not you are married.
This would be my preference as well. There is only one acceptable term nowadays for a male - "Sir" - it should be the same for women. It shouldn't be function of what someone judges her marital status, age, or perceived desire to be thought of as young/old to be.
I've heard of the Southern U.S. being described as "...a place where 80-year-old men call 16-year-old waitresses "ma'am", and nobody thinks twice about it."
Probably another regional difference then. It seems that here in the northeast, people do not like being called ma'am. I was raised to respect my elders by calling them Mr _____ or Mrs ____. But there was no word to use when we didn't know their names. Sometimes you do need a word to use, like, "____", come back, you forgot your keys!" A word for when it's urgent. I don't know what we northeasterners would say in such a case. "Hey, person!" "Hey, you!" So we're stuck with ma'am or sir in cases like that.
I simply use "excuse me" with urgency in those cases. I don't use honorifics & I hate it when someone uses them for me, so when someone drops something or forgets an item at the checkout, I just say "excuse me, you forgot your..." with some urgency. Never had a problem.
I know CD skews older, but I'm still surprised at all the women who are ok with being called Ma'am. I've never met a single woman who is comfortable with it & I'm in my 50's. Living in a military town now, I've had to get used to it, but none of my friends can stand it (in any of the states I've lived in).
I know CD skews older, but I'm still surprised at all the women who are ok with being called Ma'am. I've never met a single woman who is comfortable with it & I'm in my 50's. Living in a military town now, I've had to get used to it, but none of my friends can stand it (in any of the states I've lived in).
And I can't recall meeting someone of my peer group (early 40's) who was vehemently opposed to it.
I use Sir and Ma'am all the time. Obviously, if I know that someone prefers not to be addressed that way, I won't. But, generally speaking, I anticipate that it will be taken in the manner it is intended- light-hearted and polite.
I've heard of the Southern U.S. being described as "...a place where 80-year-old men call 16-year-old waitresses "ma'am", and nobody thinks twice about it."
Here in the south, it's not considered an offensive term at all.
Folks here use it all the time, for any woman they want to show respect. I love it; ma'am me all day and all night, for all I care.
This. Heck, I say ma'am to the teenage girl behind the counter at Hardee's.
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