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No need for personal attacks (your two conclusions are ludicrous and quite laughable BTW!)... but yes, I have heard of bath salts.
And I am done justifying my successful parenting to you.
Over and done....
I don't know you. I only know your words. If I'm attacking anything, it's your words, not you. If you don't want to be criticized, then try another forum. You do not need to justify yourself to me or anyone else on this board. I'm willing to stipulate that your parenting was successful because they turned out alright, even if you can't show a causal relationship between your "simple" approach and their result.
I attack ideas, not the people that have them.
I am curious as to why an obviously grown woman would refer to themselves as a "chick". Where I come from that is considered a derogatory term.
Until laws are changed it is indeed a criminal issue that the parents can be held liable. Additionally it is a social problem, and potentially a medical problem, most definitely a parenting problem.
Keep kids busy enough, be it with homework, activities, and/or a job, and they will not have either the time or energy to get into trouble be it abusing drugs or otherwise.
I was on the straight and narrow because I had respect born of fear of the consequences my parents would bring down upon me if I ever so much as dared try an illegal substance while living under their roof. I was almost never left alone or to my own accord. Bored kids find trouble, or as it used to be phrased, idle hands are the devil's workshop.
Jackbooted thuggary, no; good parenting, yes.
Yes, until it is legal it is a crime for which the parents can be held liable, got that. However, the circumstances we are describing, that you as a parent suspect drug use by your minor child, does not NEED to involve the police, or any other outsider, such as this company, as the first course of action.
If you looked at the state police, or even some of the county and town police in my state, they wear, for lack of a better description, a simulation of a military uniform that includes something very similar to a jack boot. I was speaking of Law Enforcement, not a 67 years dead dictator.
I think it is a great idea. As long as the poor dog doesn't pee when it alerts, I'm cool with that....!!
In all seriousness, we used to use the drug sniffing dogs quite a bit in the military, especially in the barracks. Always loved seeing them in action. Wouldn't have a problem bringing them into my house if I suspected a problem as long as the police were kept out of it and the drugs were safely disposed of.
My high school boyfriends dad was a narc officer and his k9 partner lived in their backyard. All the time he would run the dog through the house searching for anything the boys may have brought home. Didnt stop the boys from smoking pot, they just didnt keep them in the house. And it created a level of distrust between father and son and son and father. Not a good idea in my opinion.
The idea of the drug dog wasn't the problem, it was the boys smoking. Sad, Dad is making the money to support them by offering a service to the community, i.e. police officer, and they are willing to throw him and his professional rep un the bus. Hope that shady guy is your ex.
Didn't realize this thread will still so interesting to people
Quote:
Originally Posted by beachmel
Ah.....so what would be the second or third offense then. It's not like I'm disagreeing with you on that "first offense" statement BTW. Something tells me that not too many folks would use a drug sniffing dog or call the law on thier children for first offenses. When it's an ongoing battle...what then?
When it is an on-going battle then it is time to escalate your response to the problem with your child, whatever the problem is, drugs, curfew, who they hang out with, etc.. But remember, if they are teens they are going to rebel against your authority, it's a requirement for their emotional development as they mature, so try to find out WHY they don't think they have to listen to you. Have a real discussion, including consequences, not just a, "because I said so" speech.
Just like MOgal and I have both said, "Parents house, parents rules". That has to be understood. If it's not, then depending on their age, there are many things you could do as their legal guardian, including changing schools, having them live with a relative for a period of time, professional counseling - outside of a rehab clinic at first, unless the drug they are using has a high incidence of physical addiction and they need a hospital setting.
I say this because the professionals I've spoken to will try to get to the underlying cause of any misbehavior, while a drug rehab clinic will try and re-educte your child to the governments stance on drug use, including that all use is abuse, which many teens will immediately reject. Although they may play the same game they do with you, which is to pretend to accept what they are hearing, until they can leave.
Having been to 3 rehabs as a guest of staff, not an inmate, and talking to some of the staff away from management, I found that putting a child in a live in situation with a bunch of teens with the same issues, and other high risk behaviors, resulted in more high risk behavior, not less. I'm not saying this is true in all rehabs, just the 3 I went to. I believe this is another manifestation of peer pressure.
The staff at each facility struggled to keep the boys away from the girls and the girls from the boys. There also was definate evidence of hazing at some facilities. Not a good environment for rehabilitation, in my view.
Finally, I would only call the police directly if there was violence involved, or crimes against the family, like intimidation of younger siblings, attempted intimidation of myself or spouse, theft, destruction of property, dealing to other teens (since then we are talking about potentially harming others), etc.
I think it is a great idea. As long as the poor dog doesn't pee when it alerts, I'm cool with that....!!
In all seriousness, we used to use the drug sniffing dogs quite a bit in the military, especially in the barracks. Always loved seeing them in action. Wouldn't have a problem bringing them into my house if I suspected a problem as long as the police were kept out of it and the drugs were safely disposed of.
Key words being "as long as the police were kept out of it"...highly unlikely!...better to just do your own sniffin around.
Before anyone calls out the dogs, you might be interested to know that drug dogs have a very high rate of false positives. If their handler thinks drugs might be present, they'll unconsciously cue the dog to alert. So if YOU think your kid could have drugs somewhere, the handler will too...that's pretty much a perfect situation to make a dog give a false positive. The handler might then blame the alert on residue from drugs when in fact no drugs ever existed.
UC Davis recently did a study in which experienced drug dogs and handlers were asked to search rooms in which no drugs were present. If the handlers were cued that drugs were likely in the room, the dogs have a high tendency to alert. Just something being present that would catch the handler's interest like red paper caused the dogs to alert more.
Dogs are dogs...they like to please people. They're also really, really good at reading body language.
My uncle adopts retired police dogs, and I always joke around with my husband saying that undoubtedly our kids, like most, will ask for a dog growing up... so when our future kids hit their teens or so, we can appease them and adopt a retired police/ narc dog. Win-win-win situation-- kids get a dog, no training needed, and we avoid drugs within the home (and hopefully outside too!). Haha
That's all said tongue in cheek though. Like a bunch of posters said, I hope I'd know enough about my kids and remember the realities of being a teen to notice something is amiss. I don't think it's a bad idea, but I think it is appropriate for extreme cases, not minor suspicians.
Until laws are changed it is indeed a criminal issue that the parents can be held liable. Additionally it is a social problem, and potentially a medical problem, most definitely a parenting problem.
Keep kids busy enough, be it with homework, activities, and/or a job, and they will not have either the time or energy to get into trouble be it abusing drugs or otherwise.
I was on the straight and narrow because I had respect born of fear of the consequences my parents would bring down upon me if I ever so much as dared try an illegal substance while living under their roof. I was almost never left alone or to my own accord. Bored kids find trouble, or as it used to be phrased, idle hands are the devil's workshop.
Jackbooted thuggary, no; good parenting, yes.
Yes, parents have a right to have a drug free or gun free house.
Where I live, it's even more than a criminal problem - it's a problem that can get someone killed. One guy who used to live by me wasn't a kid, he was an older guy who was always broke and needed beer money and/or money for pot. He started selling marijuana but since he always needed money, he didn't pay the guys who got him into selling and they beat the hell out of him.
It's very unlikely he went across the border on his own accord since he had sold his green card and didn't get a replacement but he was found dead in a Juarez street shortly after he was beaten badly over here. Getting involved with drugs at all can put you in contact and in the debt of some really bad people.
One of my co-worker's brother got into pot and he got busted for bringing drugs over the border, but reduced his sentence down to probation by talking -- however talking can get you killed also.
I'm pretty sure that the parents already know about the drug use/stash. The dog is just used to intimidate the kids and give them a taste of what it will be like when a real cop pulls them over and then orders a drug sniffing dog to go over their car.
The parents who use this service should be commended for actually caring about their children and not just letting them flounder thru life making all kinds of mistakes that could be avoided with better judgment skills.
You can be a parent or a friend but not both.
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No it's not a Hitler reference
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