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Parent seeking advice how to discuss gun issue with friend’s parents, concerned with son going over to their house, good family, do not want to offend them
I don't think people sit around playing with guns just because they own them.
And if my kid was playing at someone's home, especially at a young age, I am pretty sure that I would know as much as possible about them, including whether or not they have guns in their homes.
And it has nothing to do with the parent here. The OP has stated that. It has to do with children being children. Them testing their limits. It's about the children and not the parents.
I am far from absured, but thank your for the educated observation.
The OP's username has a tobacco reference in it, specifically cigars. Is it safe to assume she smokes? What if I don't want my kids around her second-hand or third-hand smoke? It is known that direct smoke from the smoker or their burning cigarette is harmful to the health, and now studies are beginning to suggest that smoke that has settled on things such as clothing and furniture might be just as harmful (as is the case with asbestos). Assuming she is a smoker, how can she consider herself fit to be around children? She's contaminating their lungs with poison.
I know of this guy who was raised by his mother and grandmother, they never let him go anywhere except school, after which he had to come straight home. They wouldn't even let him play in the yard as they kept telling him he would be kidnapped by perverts. This was in the town of Conneaut, Ohio.
They never let him do anything or go anywhere. Today he is about 50 years old, he's never been on a date, never left the town, never really gone anywhere or done anything. He doesn't have a car because he never was allowed to get his license, along with having been warned about cars. He bicycles around town and can be seen on a regular basis.
Just think, in fifty years, that could be your son.
Far fetched. Jumping to conclusions. No sense. Not comparable. BRANCHING too far AGAIN!!!!!! All these things come to mind when I keep reading things like this.
The OP has stated her children DO go out and have fun. They do not seem overprotected by any means. I'm sure she has rules set that some parents don't or the other way around.
And like she said: If her kids are hurt or god forbid killed because they were at a house with guns (by the guns) and she could have done something to prevent it, she wouldn't be able to live with herself. But her kid walking down the street and being wacked in the head by a piano falling from an apartment building would have been more unavoidable.
The OP's username has a tobacco reference in it, specifically cigars. Is it safe to assume she smokes? What if I don't want my kids around her second-hand or third-hand smoke? It is known that direct smoke from the smoker or their burning cigarette is harmful to the health, and now studies are beginning to suggest that smoke that has settled on things such as clothing and furniture might be just as harmful (as is the case with asbestos). Assuming she is a smoker, how can she consider herself fit to be around children? She's contaminating their lungs with poison.
Your assumptions do nothing for reason and education.
The fact that you have to "reach" so far to attempt to prove some point you think you have just proves that you have no case.
This thread has a simple question and a simple answere. She should do whatever she feels is right in her heart. She should protect her children in any way she pleases.
And no. If I knew that a parent smoked (which I'm pretty sure I would know) my child would not be allowed to play there if they smoked inside. However, it is hardly unavoidable to keep my children away from smoke that lingers in the air outside or on someone's clothes who smoked earlier. If I can protect against 1/3 things I will. I'm not going to say "I'm not going to protect my child from 1 thing because I can't protect her from ALL 3!!!!" That isn't logical
My child already has a core group of friends that I can see them growing up together and becoming life friends. Those children have parents that I know very well. They happen to be similarly freakishly, overprotective. I feel comfortable when my child is over there and they feel the same about me.
:
If our children were friends you probably would let them come to my house.
1. We don't hunt.
2. I am considered "over protective".
3. I know where they are, what they are doing, who they are with at ALL TIMES!
4. I don't let them run the neighborhood w/o adult supervision. I don't even let them ride bikes or play in the front w/o adult supervision.
5. No swimming unless an adult is paying close attention to them.
6. Make sure each and every child is properly restrained in the vehicle at ALL TIMES! I will not move until they are and if they should come out of it at any point in time....... I'm paying attention so it will be corrected.
7. Very safe driver.
8. Set the house alarm at night when we go to bed and every single time we leave the house.
9. Make sure that all fire/smoke alarms have batteries replaced twice a year.
10. Make sure kids in my care are dressed properly for the weather. Saw a kid the other day about 10/11 that was wearing a TANK TOP out shopping at an outdoor mall WITH THE MOTHER! And neither of them were carrying a coat and it was a high of 30something degrees with a very strong north wind. Another child of same age was with them...... she had on a coat. Even if the child spent the night and wasn't mine........ they would be dressed properly out in weather in MY CARE!
11. Keep doors and windows locked. Keep the back fence gate locked.
12. Have outdoor security cameras.
13. And a whole host of other things.
14. WE OWN GUNS!!!! I just don't brag about it nor make it well known. They are locked up in an area that is OFF LIMITS even to my own children as they do NOT belong in the master bedroom or bathroom. Then again here in this area the masters are DOWNSTAIRS and not up. So if the kids are upstairs playing they can't sneak into the master w/o an adult knowing. If a parent asked me if we owned them....... sure, we do. If you asked to see where they are kept? NO WAY!!! They are in a VERY SAFE place and by telling YOU I have just risked their safety. NO WAY! If you then forbid your child from coming over........... my child most likely would not be allowed at your house ever. Why? That gun has literally saved MY LIFE! At least I have something to protect your child from and my family in case someone breaks in. Yes, you can call the police but not if they get to you before you get to a phone. Even so, they can shot you or stab you and run and the police are still several minutes away. How do I know if you set your home alarm to make sure to ward off the chance of someone breaking in? How do I know you do it religiously? I well do I know if you have ANY KIND of plan to protect those in your care in case such should happen? What can you use to defend those children in your care without a weapon yet it is as effective as a gun?
Far fetched. Jumping to conclusions. No sense. Not comparable. BRANCHING too far AGAIN!!!!!! All these things come to mind when I keep reading things like this.
The OP has stated her children DO go out and have fun. They do not seem overprotected by any means. I'm sure she has rules set that some parents don't or the other way around.
And like she said: If her kids are hurt or god forbid killed because they were at a house with guns (by the guns) and she could have done something to prevent it, she wouldn't be able to live with herself. But her kid walking down the street and being wacked in the head by a piano falling from an apartment building would have been more unavoidable.
What if her house is broken into by a maniac or a pair of maniacs and her kids have to watch their father beaten and killed, their mother beaten, raped, killed, as they hide under the bed, helpless? Or if they are found and attacked by the home invaders.
Would she be able to live with herself if her kids were killed by home invaders, knowing she could have had a gun and tried to do something about it, as opposed to not having a gun and being virtually helpless.
If the OP is so hostile against guns, she should be willing to put a sign in her yard which reads, "I DO NOT BELIEVE IN FIREARMS AND THERE ARE NO GUNS IN THIS HOUSE" right? That way other parents who share her concerns, but who are too nervous to ask such a hot-button question, can feel safe sending their kids to her house to play, right?
I believe it is the height of irresponsibility for a person to bring a child into this world but not take measures to defend them until they at least reach a point where they can fend for themself. An 8 year old boy cannot understand the intricate nature of self-defense laws, when lethal force is warranted, what sort of dangers exist in the world, etc. He is entirely dependent on his parents, who have a duty and obligation to assure they are trained, equipped, and competent, to defend him should he need it. Furthermore, they have a duty to keep themselves safe lest their child be made an orphan should something happen to them. When a young life depends on you, you're supposed to rise to the occasion and keep them safe. The 8 year old boy doesn't understand the concept of home invasion, carjackers, rapists, serial killers, muggers, gang-bangers, etc. He doesn't get a say in whether or not a firearm is used to defend him and his siblings, he has to trust that his parents will do the right thing and will be able (and willing) to protect him, when the time comes. The OP seems to be eager to shove her phobia of guns down the throats of others by saying that they are unfit to have her children on their property. If she won't measure up and maintain the equipment and readiness, to defend her children if necessary, then she is the one that folks need to worry about.
What if her house is broken into by a maniac or a pair of maniacs and her kids have to watch their father beaten and killed, their mother beaten, raped, killed, as they hide under the bed, helpless? Or if they are found and attacked by the home invaders.
Would she be able to live with herself if her kids were killed by home invaders, knowing she could have had a gun and tried to do something about it, as opposed to not having a gun and being virtually helpless.
If the OP is so hostile against guns, she should be willing to put a sign in her yard which reads, "I DO NOT BELIEVE IN FIREARMS AND THERE ARE NO GUNS IN THIS HOUSE" right? That way other parents who share her concerns, but who are too nervous to ask such a hot-button question, can feel safe sending their kids to her house to play, right?
Although I will say there are SOME people that should NOT be allowed to be near a gun. My own sister is one. There is no way that girl needs a gun in her hands. If it came down to actually having to fire it if she pulled it out..... I don't think she could. If someone has a gun they MUST be willing to actually fire it. As I was taught in one CHL class, if you pull it you better be prepared to fire it. Pulling it out to defend and not willing to fire it is one sure fire way to get your own gun used against you.
The last time I checked, most gun-owners don't put signs in their yards .
Why not? People whose fanaticism is sex are required to, why not guns? Sex is a lot less dangerous than guns.
And, actually, yes they do. They have NRA decals in their car window, and clever signs that say "Protected by Smith and Wesson Security". And usually, a dog tied up in the back yard that barks all night is a dead giveaway.
14. WE OWN GUNS!!!! I just don't brag about it nor make it well known. They are locked up in an area that is OFF LIMITS even to my own children as they do NOT belong in the master bedroom
There is nothing wrong with guns in the master bedroom, as long as they are in a proper safe. Even if my kids can get in my bedroom, they CANNOT get in my safe. We have two biometric safes, and only my husband and I can access them.
Having guns downstairs, isn't going to help you if you are sleeping upstairs.....
There is nothing wrong with guns in the master bedroom, as long as they are in a proper safe. Even if my kids can get in my bedroom, they CANNOT get in my safe. We have two biometric safes, and only my husband and I can access them.
Having guns downstairs, isn't going to help you if you are sleeping upstairs.....
I keep most of my guns in a safe, either totally unloaded (with loaded magazines nearby), loaded but with nothing in the chamber, or loaded and ready to go. The only gun I keep out of my safe is the pistol I keep on my person, secured in a holster.
So nobody is ever going to get them or misuse them.
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