Cultural differences--East Coast to Phoenix transplant (transplants, home, theater)

[nerd42]

I'm wondering about stuff to do to avoid annoying people. (Apart from posting stupid questions about intellectuals.) I know a lot of people find New Yorkers abrasive, and I've been told it's important to avoid appearing too negative in the rest of the country. Apart from tossing out my black clothing, what should I do to avoid ruffling too many feathers?

I'm also a big geek, which isn't going to help things.

P.S. Apart from politics. I know I'm going to have to move right.

P.P.S. If anyone knows where there are nerd chicks in Phoenix...

[friggsdottir]

Hellman's is called Best Foods.

[Java Jolt]

Originally Posted by nerd42

I'm wondering about stuff to do to avoid annoying people. (Apart from posting stupid questions about intellectuals.) I know a lot of people find New Yorkers abrasive, and I've been told it's important to avoid appearing too negative in the rest of the country. Apart from tossing out my black clothing, what should I do to avoid ruffling too many feathers?

I'm also a big geek, which isn't going to help things.

P.S. Apart from politics. I know I'm going to have to move right.

P.P.S. If anyone knows where there are nerd chicks in Phoenix...

Being social but keeping a reasonable distance and blending in is the most important thing.

Being too critical of a new place compared to where you moved from is a no-no, this applies to anyone from all walks of life.

[Finger Laker]

People are people everywhere

the east coast is a pretty big area - but if looking generally at east coast cities (NY in specific) you'll find that people in phoenix generally are adapted to a little more space and privacy

we don't spend a lot of time walking on the streets, we don't cram ourselves into public transportation with the masses, we don't sit around waiting for a bus with a horde of other people, we don't all run to the lunch counter in big groups

there is just a smaller critical mass of people

people will park in their garage and sit in their yard behind the privacy of a 6' block fence ..... if they have their garage as storage then it's a quick walk in the front door

Even for things to do, not everyone with a shared interest goes into a single area - there is no real theater district, or music district, etc ........ you have some nightlife/entertainment hot spots ... but even then you'll find pockets all around the city

with this you're not going to find masses milling about who are all just hanging out

you just aren't forced around people so much and some of that interaction is lost ....... I lived in philly for a while and what some would consider abrasive, i found to just be honest and a different communication style .... it was very common to have strangers shout at you on the streets, sometimes just friendly conversation, sometimes to give you a hard time ... it can be a shock to those who aren't used to it, but it was never anything bad

you don't get that out here

however, on the flip side, when I moved to mpls you have a pretty big group of a steady population - people are surface friendly, but really didn't open up much unless in the comfort of their group of friends (which often went back decades) ..... i made a lot of good friends, but never had a group of friends when living there - i'd hang out with one buddy and his group, then another buddy and his group, then my girlfriend and her group .... you put all my individual friends in a room with each other and away from their groups and it would get a little akward

you don't really get that out here either ... you have a lot of transplants, a younger population, a more transitional population

so while the styles may be different and things will present differently ... people are still people

we have a whole range of interests, your politics can be what they are and will only be an issue if you make it one, you may need to dig a little for your scene but it's probably here, you may need to make a little extra effort to know your neighbors but chances are they're friendly, etc

The Phoenix Comicon is pretty well attended - there is an annual faerie festival at one of the parks here in goodyear, there are plenty of geeky/nerdy things to do and if you make a little effort and put yourself out there you'll find what you look for

some geek out on sports, i know a guy who is into racing RC cars, i know a couple former coworkers who would have weekly D&D games, there are more than enough $30k millionaires, people who are into offroading, quads & dirt bikes, car geeks, math nerds, fashion followers, etc

I think the biggest adjustment coming from back east though is moving to a city with a more suburban feel, spread out, car reliant where what you're looking for may not be easy to find as back home

[AZJoeD]

Originally Posted by friggsdottir

Hellman's is called Best Foods.

Edy's is called Dryer's.

[friggsdottir]

Hardee's is called Carl Jr

[roundball]

Originally Posted by friggsdottir

Hardee's is called Carl Jr

Hardee's breakfast is AWESOME!
Carl Jr.s breakfast is not.

[Ritchie_az]

Originally Posted by friggsdottir

Hardee's is called Carl Jr

Carl's Jr is better, though. Yes, I know CKE Restaurants has been slowly changing the Hardees menu to be more like Carl's Jr, but it's not quite there yet....

[shiphead]

Originally Posted by nerd42

I'm wondering about stuff to do to avoid annoying people. (Apart from posting stupid questions about intellectuals.) I know a lot of people find New Yorkers abrasive, and I've been told it's important to avoid appearing too negative in the rest of the country. Apart from tossing out my black clothing, what should I do to avoid ruffling too many feathers?

I'm also a big geek, which isn't going to help things.

P.S. Apart from politics. I know I'm going to have to move right.

P.P.S. If anyone knows where there are nerd chicks in Phoenix...

I typically don't enjoy New Yorkers, specifically people from NYC, not necessarily the state. One of the people I hang out with once in a while is from NY and he is normal.

Being a geek from any state offends everyone but the geeks in this city.

[SageCats]

There will be annoying people anywhere and everywhere you go. There are good, bad, pretty, ugly, annoying, cool, etc. people everywhere.
You don't have to toss out your black clothing. You don't have to change your political views, either. In face you don't have to change anything about you. Just be you and you'll find your niche... and "nerd chick, too."

I'm from your area and I'm not changing my wardrobe nor my political point of view nor anything about me just because I'm moving 2000+ miles away. I'm still going to be me.

I've been to AZ several times and have great friends out there. It's really not another world. You're not going to go into complete culture shock. I find that a lot of people here in the NJ/NYC metro area have this mentality that modern civilization ends at the NJ / PA state line and that the rest of the US is hicksville. In fact, I get a lot of flack for my upcoming move out to AZ. This couldn't be farther from the truth! Not everyone outside of this area is a hick, cowboy, extreme conservative, or whatever other terms I've heard people use. With that said, I think that you'll be fine out in AZ. No need to panic.