Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have 9 y.o daughter and I'm in 7th month of 2nd pregnanacy. Please tell me how it loooks when older sister/brother came to you in hospital (after birth) for the first time? Did she/he asked you ,,Why are you in bed, mommy?" ? If so, what do you tell her/him? You were in bed and your older kids sits on your bed, stays near it or what?
And if you where wheeled from your room to the car (on the day when you and toddler were coming home) what was your older kids reaction for your wheeldchair ?? Older kids waited in the car or walk near your wheelchair?
I have been talking about my second pregnancy with my 3 year old for a while now. I am preparing her that I will be in the hospital for 3 days (its going to C-section) and that I will be in a bad with the little guy when she comes to visit me. I also told her that she could sit with me on the bed and that she will be spending the 3 days with my parents (her grand parents).
I would say prepare her for everything you can think of so that it doesnt come as a surprise for the girl.
My twins were 7 when I had my third. They handled it great! 9 is plenty old enough to be informed and not afraid. It's actually a blessing that the oldest is 9 because she is much more independent and understanding than a toddler would be.
My in-laws kept the twins the morning we went in for a C-section and brought them in soon after I was back in my room. We honestly didn't prep them THAT much. They knew they were going to a hospital and that they should be on their best behavior, quiet and calm. They were very gentle with me and with the baby.
On the day we left, they followed my wheelchair out. One carried a vase of flowers and the other carried a teddy bear that we had gotten as a gift. Being a helper gives them something to focus on.
They don't need an in-depth lesson on the inner workings of hospitals. Just let her know what the general situation will be and the expectations for her. On the day of the birth, one of the twins actually was so worried about missing school that he said, "OK, the baby's here. Can I go on to school now?" LOL
My older one was about 3 when the younger one was born. She knew in advance that she would be staying with her former sitter if we had to go to the hospital in the middle of the night and that her grandparents would pick her up later. She didn't visit until the next day as I had an emergency C-section so was out of it the first day.
I think I was sitting up in a chair when she came to meet her brother. She wanted to touch him and knew to do so gently. I did make her visit about her though. I had purchased a baby doll before the younger one was born. I gave it to her that day as a gift from her new brother. She also wanted to eat my hospital dessert. The most difficult part was helping her to understand the I couldn't pick her up due to the C-section and stitches.
Leaving the hospital she walked next to me in the wheelchair on the way out wearing the "Big Sister" sweatshirt the two of us made together and carrying her new doll.
I think she was a bit confused by it all, but she was fine staying with her grandparents. The one thing I did not expect is that I would start tearing up when she came in the room the first time. It was so touching.
At 9 it shouldn't be a problem. Tell your daughter the plans and go from there. You might give her some options about who will watch her while you are away or other things if it is possible.
Your daughter is 9. Surely she knows about women giving birth, right? If not, it might be time for a talk.
I'm not sure I understand your concerns? Are you afraid she is going to be scared seeing you in a bed or wheelchair? Just start explaining what happens. "When you come in, mommy will be in her hospital bed. You can come sit with me. When I leave, they take me out in a wheelchair to make sure I am safe until I get to the car".
I really don't understand what you think the problem is.
If I understand you, you seem to be worried that your 9 year old will be traumatized to see you in bed or in a wheelchair. Is that right? It won't do her any good if you try to hide it. If she knows how babies come into the world, she should have some idea of what your body has been through, and should understand the need for the bed and wheelchair. Don't over think this.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
