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Yes, what happens during marriage is that men have to be responsible, mature adults who take care of their families. Some men can't deal with this. And it is, once again, pathetic that you (as a woman, and NOT a parent, I might add) are surreptitiously blaming women for this.
I'm the biggest supporter of women but MOST men are still brought up by WOMEN. As a woman- and almost every woman has been subject to discrimination of some sort from society, including poor treatment by their husbands,- then how come the MOTHERS of such men DID NOT teach their sons and grandsons to respect women? They KNOW BETTER, the truth's that values and guidance are usually passed on down by the mothers (doesn't mean I agree with it) so it stands to reason that it's women who are making life hard for other women and thus causing problems for the children? If women, since most men seem to be comfy with the status quo, could band together to impart those responsiblities then we could change things more.
And needless to say, men who abandon their children are not real men, unless their wives are completely unreasonable or mentally- ill. We understand where you come from and know some women have had to bring up their kids by themselves.
I put others before myself. I'm a giver. I've spent several weeks taking care of a newborn. Personally, I thought it was a piece of cake.
HAHAHAHAHA........ooohhhh, several weeks experience and you are an expert....yay you.
Wait until that newborn gets sick and projectile vomits in your soup bowl and your mouth......let's see how you like your cake then.
You have no idea what in hades you are talking about and really have nothing to offer anyone except to show your own misguided belief as to how easy something is that you have never experienced.
You should stick to something you may know something about like........Pink and Mani's
I put others before myself. I'm a giver. I've spent several weeks taking care of a newborn. Personally, I thought it was a piece of cake.
Babysitting a newborn is quite different that mothering your own newborn. Giving birth, possibly having a c-section, hormones surging, emotions racing, exhausted, trying to figure out nursing and get on a schedule. Having the baby wake up every 2-4 hours day and night to eat can all be very draining. Add to that if you have any other children and you have just compounded the effort greatly.
Babysitting a newborn is quite different that mothering your own newborn. Giving birth, possibly having a c-section, hormones surging, emotions racing, exhausted, trying to figure out nursing and get on a schedule. Having the baby wake up every 2-4 hours day and night to eat can all be very draining. Add to that if you have any other children and you have just compounded the effort greatly.
Uh, oh....waiting.......waiting....for the comments to come shooting in about how, "....well YOU chose to have sex, you CHOSE to have that kid, it's not the precious kids' fault, you shoulda known what you were getting in to......millions of women do it every day, etc." Yeah, easy enough for someone to say how easy something is when they've never actually done it. They did something KIND of like it, but not all the way...yeah, easy peasy.
Abortion stops a beating heart and that is a big deal. I admire the women who support and parent their children versus terminating their heartbeat. It take two people to make a baby the old-fashioned way. And, your statement "Generally, if a couple was married, he stays in their lives after the divorce is finalized." shows your lack of understanding about such situations. Just because you can hook a man into marriage doesn't mean he will always be around for the children. Fathers are the kind of fathers they would be whether married to the mother or not. Again, abortion stops a beating heart.
This really seems more like a post from a guy and/or a girl who has a guy that got someone else pregnant and that girl doesn't want to abort the baby.
Last edited by AnywhereElse; 10-16-2013 at 06:50 AM..
This is largely a socio-economic issue. It clearly takes two parents and reasonable income to raise children. By this I don't mean merely allowing children to get by until they turn 18 but to actually raise them, educate them and give them the experiences required for them to be prepared to thrive in a complex global environment. Without this foundation it will be very hard for kids not to simply fall into what seems to be an ever expanding American underclass. Depressing
Here is my take on the situation. I have seen and witnessed this type of birthing myself. Also note the fact that I live in a very poor congressional district where plenty of out of wedlock births are the norm and is accepted by the populace of the general society. For the most part is that in poor neighborhoods there are no men around, many are either in jail, or either flee for oppurtunities such as college or military, this leaves a small pool of men that women find desirable to have babies with and most often its not a finicially stable man that lives because those types of men are rare or if a financial stable man lives in the area he probably pursues women or is attracted to women of a different income strata. Also women do not need a mans money anymore, generally women obtain money from family contribution, government or whatever pennies they earn from work, eliminating the financial/security and safety part of a relationship is gone and now it becomes strictly based on emotion and desires. Also fathers are not needed any more, in most cases single mother households an uncle, or any other male relative can be used a male father figure for children. Another thing is genetics, women have kids for certain men they find physically attracted to and very often these men are not financially stable themselves to have any kids. Another thing is that having children out of wedlock pushes these women into adulthood faster, also with the need to show love and affection that many long for! But again this is what I witnessed and observed. Thankfully as a stable guy who is educated and ambitious, I have yet to have any kids because I cant find a suitable woman because I'm stuck in between the two extremes of poverty and wealth!
I agree with this and also think there is another factor that ties into it.
I frequently have to drive past a housing development on my way to the post office. All day long the common areas are filled with young, single women carting around tons of babies and toddlers. Many of them look right out of high school. I think in many pockets or communities, these young girls grow up almost expecting to get pregnant as a teen and become a single mom right out of high school - it has become an accepted cultural norm. When you grow up around this, and are surrounded by all your girlfriends with babies, you would almost be the odd-man out if you did not have kids.
I can vouch for this in the area I live in. I see these young girls, all the time, with a baby perched on their hip and you know, the mother is sometimes barely in their teens and no male in sight. It hurts my heart for both mother and child.
Largely, but not totally. I come from an upper class family, and my sister is a single mom. It's not common by any stretch in the suburb that I grew up, but I know for a fact that my sister is not the only one from our area in this situation.
And the people talking about having an abortion like it's no big deal are either trolls, children, or exceedingly insensitive human beings. I'm pro-choice, but I'm also well aware that that is one of the hardest choices a woman could ever have to make.
As for the other forms of contraception: they're not as convenient as you may think. Condoms are convenient, but not as pleasurable for a man. The Pill is super convenient unless if you have high blood pressure issues or some other impeding ailment like my sister does, preventing her being prescribed birth control. IUDs aren't cheap. The Morning After and similar products aren't intended to be used regularly. Etc, etc.
Like I said earlier in the thread, the most common reasons for this kind of situation are being unwilling, unable, or too uninformed to purchase the right kind of contraception for you. Just don't think that the only women who become baby mommas became such because they are poor, ghetto hussies who are too stupid or stubborn to make sensible choices.
Finally, I don't understand what the OP's point was in making this thread. To bash women that she looks down on? How about instead bashing those women you take pride in the fact that you're not in their shoes, and leave it at that?
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