Not a good idea buying house near ex, right? (properties, rental, claim)

[bpollen]

Originally Posted by goofy328

Stop stalking him.

You need to re-read my post. Reading is your friend, as your elementary school teacher surely told you.

[bpollen]

Originally Posted by Robino1

If it was that long ago that you were married to him, also depends on if he was violent, I don't know if that would stop me from getting the house.

Violence? No way.

Also regarding the dog's temperament, he may be picking up your angst over the house hunting situation. They totally sense when we are on edge and upset.

Comps.... Zillow and sites like that are not great at good comp data. Take those with a grain of salt. If you are getting good comp information, what the heck are the agents doing???? Have you shown them the comps you are finding and what do they say to that? Scratch that last question, just reread the post where you addressed this...a little bit.

I really feel bad for you. I do hope you find something that works for you.

No violence. That's kinda funny, if you knew me. I'm not the sort of woman any man would dare try to be violent with. Something about me, I guess. No...it was just a terrible divorce. He took my car and such, forged an income tax return, stole money (I was the breadwinner), and did some very hurtful, mean things. I was crushed at the way he behaved, until finally I just cut off communications, to his displeasure (he thought he could keep an ex wife around, and still fool around with babes, I think). I have no interest in him or people like him whatsoever. Not a good person.

The comps...the comps are on Zillow, and yes, they are accurate in one state, since sales prices are published and are a matter of public record. If you wait long enough, the sales price is on the appraisal site (I can see what "Fred Smith" bought the house for, and when).

For the other state, where sales prices aren't published, I used a combination of zillow and Redfin, which will post sales prices, which are approximations. They are not exact, but close enough. But even if I wasn't sure of the sales price, I knew if they were comparable and that they had sold recently, and that they weren't on the agent's comp list.

In the smaller TX city, the agent gave me several comps, ALL for houses that were much larger, nicer, and 20 years newer. But I knew of two comps that weren't on the list because I remembered them when they were listed, and the prices they were listed for. I knew it had taken a while for them to sell, and the list prices had been decreased. So I KNEW they had probably sold for less than their last list price. Both of those comps were well below the comps the agent gave me and were closer to being comparable than the ones on her list.

Someone can also see which houses in an area have sold recently, even if she can't tell the sales price. It's a red flag if it's nearby, looks at least somewhat comparable, sold within the last 6 mos, and isn't on the agent's comp list.

So I knew enough to know the comps being given to me (or told that there were none) wasn't true. I knew at least some of what had sold recently, and in some cases, exactly what they had sold for. And which ones were more comparable. None of which was given to me by the three agents.

I was very disappointed. I really liked and trusted one of those agents, in particular. I hated to see that she was no different and didn't want me to have all the facts. Oh, well.

[blueherons]

I guess I am in the minority but I wouldn't care that my ex lived there and I HATE him.

He may be the only person on the planet I hate.

You can do a lot with a privacy fence.

[elliedeee]

It's been a long time since you two got divorced and he's obviously moved on even though he got divorced again.

I see no reason why you can't buy a house in the same area he lives in. You're both adults now. Whatever happened between you two is a lifetime ago.
Just don't walk down his block if you don't want to run into him.

[PinaCarlotta]

I'd consider it and not give a if he or anyone else thinks I bought it to be near him. People are going to believe what they want.
I agree with those who suggest that you walk in the opposite direction from where he lives.

[AfternoonCoffee]

Originally Posted by newcomputer

I don't think it would bother me. Do you have children together? I apologize if you said and I missed it.

Water under the bridge. He is out of your life. You don't have to acknowledge him if you see him. If he says something to you, you can say "Oh my. I didn't recognize you. You have changed so much."

Originally Posted by Annemieke Roell

You are giving him way too much power. Just get over it and buy the house you like.

Originally Posted by LifeIsGood01

The perfect house is hard to find. It it's a block away you can always walk the dog in the opposite direction. Don't let something like this keep you from buying.

Originally Posted by reneeh63

You have SO little contact with your ex that you didn't know where he lived until you already found these houses? ...my experience is that men are less "neighborhood walkers" than women so if he has no reason to be out (no pets) chances of run-ins are pretty low. Unless he's a stalker type, is there that much concern? Depending on how much you like these houses and how long you've been looking and how much longer you CAN look, I just might do it. Especially if you know his exact address just don't go in that direction and walk in front of his house!

Originally Posted by animalcrazy

I would not let anyone stop me from living where I want to live or going where I want to go..

NO. It's my town and my life too. I'm sure we've passed each other a few times when I've been on my bike and walking my dogs. He stays on his side of the street, and I stay on my side of the street.

If I ever run into him again I will just treat him like another human being and go about my business. Maybe you and your ex will learn to do the same?

These were my thoughts as well. You should at least go see the houses in person (if you haven't already)

[bpollen]

Originally Posted by AfternoonCoffee

These were my thoughts as well. You should at least go see the houses in person (if you haven't already)

Thanks. I think I'll go see one of the houses. I've learned that the couple has already moved out of state, so I think they may be eager to sell. I'm in a bind in a very tight market. I don't have a lot of choices. And this is a nice house, fully fenced, large yard, pretty enough house, appears to be in good shape, in a lovely small subdivision with trees not far from main hwy. The house is not huge, which is good (so many are just huge). My dogs would love that yard, and it's a lovely area to walk.

I think I'll at least go see it. Wouldn't hurt. Maybe I won't even like it when I see it. Or maybe it needs a new roof immediately, which would take it over my budget. Worth a look.

Thanks to all for your advice and opinions. I think it'd be best if I buy elsewhere, but with my limited choices right now, I think I can't allow the situation to stop me from considering a strong possibility. I imagine I'd learn to live with it. And really, there were some neighbors on my prior street that I never saw. They didn't spend time outside.

[exit82]

just put yourself in the position of couples who share custody so they live near each other so the kids can go back and forth. They may hate each other also but they make it work- you would actually have it easier than them- I have no idea who lives a few streets away from me- besides- your ex probably looks so old now you wouldnt recognize him anyway ( I'm sure you haven't aged a day!)

[Robino1]

Another thought, you know he lives in the area, he won't know you live there. You only found out by researching with the thought of buying into the neighborhood. I doubt he is watching real estate to see who moves in.

He doesn't ever need to know that you knew he lives there before purchasing your house.

[tamitrail]

If this has been mentioned, sorry there are a lot of posts to sift through, but are you sure he actually lives in the house? Could it be his ex-wife is living there and he is still the owner? Or could it be that he rents it to someone else? Have you tried looking him up by name on the county website to see if he owns any other properties? It might just be that he doesn't live there at all.