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I'm looking for some guidance here on how to proceed with a conversation with my neighbor. I'm likely overthinking things, but want to attempt to avoid this discussion escalating into a conflict/neighbor feud. I'm also wondering if I'm getting too worked up about this, and should maybe just let it go. I'll take all feedback....
In short, they have been crossing my property line into some natural area I have behind my house and removing rocks to use in their landscaping. I have a couple acres, some of which I've let grow up. It's full of those basketball sized round rocks that people use for retaining walls, landscaping, etc. So I have plenty of rocks, which I would probably consider sharing if asked. But there was no asking - and I tend to be very protective of my property lines.
Here's some additional details...
1) This started last fall, when they completed construction on their house and started landscaping. My property has pins in the corner and the joint property line is about 600 feet long and you can't see from end to end, so I wasn't 100% sure of the exact location of the line at every point between the pins and neither were they. I paid to have a surveyor come in and put in pins/posts ever 100 feet so that the line was obvious. They know the survey was done and saw the surveyor doing it, but I didn't ever specifically talk to them about the rocks missing. I thought they would get the hint. Guess not. Lesson learned.
2) I found a shovel and more holes on my place this weekend. The rocks that are being removed are all within 2-3 feet of the property line, so there is a chance they could default to pleading ignorance when I discuss this with them. I guess that's OK, I just want it to stop.
3) While not directly related to the matter at hand, this individual has been recently convicted of felony theft. So...there may be a pattern of behavior like this in their life. I wonder if that may also drive a different reaction to this conversation than I'd expect.
At this point, my plan is to walk over and begin a conversation with "Hello, I'm not sure if you are aware of where the property lines are but it looks like you've been removing rocks from my side..." And then see where it goes. I've talked to these people briefly 1 time since they've moved here, so I'm going in cold.
It feels like the conversation needs to happen to establish the line - both literally and figuratively. But as I said, I feel more strongly about respecting property lines than some. So I guess I'm really just looking for validation that this conversation is a good course of action. If I'm overreacting and this is a minor thing in the scheme of things and I should just let it go to preserve neighborly relations - I'll take that feedback as well.
I'd also appreciate thoughts on any possible reactions they may have. When it comes to conversations like this, I'm a planner and like to have potential responses thought out in advance. I'm not going in with guns blazing, and it seems pretty cut and dried to me. But I've been wrong before.....
Does removing the rocks make anything unsightly or dangerous on your property? Meaning are they leaving large holes for someone to step into and twist/break and ankle or something?
Is the retaining wall/landscaping they are doing make the next door home look better? Are they improving the property?
The reason you feel you're over thinking is because you let it go so long. Now you're at your high gear level and fell you will go with that and cause trouble.
BACK down to low gear. Breathe. It's only the second time you noticed. They're working so hard and you think they must not know. Maybe they are relatives of the owner.
Just pretend that as much as possible.
Now, you're ready to bake an 8x8 pan of brownies if you're a female and head over to your neighbor.
Nicely let the neighbor know...you have been noticing people on your land and well it's gotten worse now you have to say because there are large holes dug. So to help them out you'll run a tape/ribbon from post to post just so the boys know.
You may feel they have gotten enough rocks and have dug enough big holes on your property that you don't want to share any more rocks...but, only if you do want to get rid of a few more, offer a specific number and maybe mark those. I wouldn't want the holes though and wouldn't personally want anything to attract such a careless, selfish, convicted thief to my property. BUT ya gotta be nice with those kind of people unfortunately.
Let us know how it goes. In some areas trespass and theft from land, especially by a convicted felony thief, is very serious. Do it now after you relax because they'll just get cozier and cozier with your property before they're on you deck.
Does removing the rocks make anything unsightly or dangerous on your property? Meaning are they leaving large holes for someone to step into and twist/break and ankle or something?
Is the retaining wall/landscaping they are doing make the next door home look better? Are they improving the property?
????????????
What difference does it make !
No one should cross property lines w/o asking permission.
Evidently their parents taught them very little about respect of others' property.
The reason you feel you're over thinking is because you let it go so long. Now you're at your high gear level and fell you will go with that and cause trouble.
BACK down to low gear. Breathe. It's only the second time you noticed. They're working so hard and you think they must not know. Maybe they are relatives of the owner.
Just pretend that as much as possible.
Now, you're ready to bake an 8x8 pan of brownies if you're a female and head over to your neighbor.
Nicely let the neighbor know...you have been noticing people on your land and well it's gotten worse now you have to say because there are large holes dug. So to help them out you'll run a tape/ribbon from post to post just so the boys know.
You may feel they have gotten enough rocks and have dug enough big holes on your property that you don't want to share any more rocks...but, only if you do want to get rid of a few more, offer a specific number and maybe mark those. I wouldn't want the holes though and wouldn't personally want anything to attract such a careless, selfish, convicted thief to my property. BUT ya gotta be nice with those kind of people unfortunately.
Let us know how it goes. In some areas trespass and theft from land, especially by a convicted felony thief, is very serious. Do it now after you relax because they'll just get cozier and cozier with your property before they're on you deck.
(6th paragraph)..........For ...those kind of people......being nice usually accomplishes nothing.
No one should cross property lines w/o asking permission.
Evidently their parents taught them very little about respect of others' property.
Because it makes a difference in what I would say to them. The OP is asking for suggestions on how to approach them and I want more information before giving suggestions. Context matters when approaching people if you want to solve things amicably. If you don't care if you escalate the situation, by all means go in guns blazing.
(6th paragraph)..........For ...those kind of people......being nice usually accomplishes nothing.
Being firm is what is needed !
I actually edited in that 6th paragraph not sure if the poster was a man or woman and what they are willing to go with.
Looking back a bit I think the poster is a guy.
Still, the guy has to live with a neighbor who is a felon. If that can be accomplished being firm but neighborly, so much the easier.
If not, the poster is going to need a lot of stuff to consistently back himself up. An overthinker may not be that way. So firm, yes, with a touch of the firm neighbor.
I would be as friendly as possible, knowing the guy has a record and you have to keep living next to him.
Maybe kindly make him aware he ist takign your rocks and try to compromise with him? For example tell him he is welcome to keep what he already took, but please do not take anymore. Or offer to give him some rocks that maybe you do not want? or tell him he is welcome to take as many as he wants in a certain area if he gives you half for a rock wall along the property line?
Just throwing some ideas out there.
I would definitely speak up however before its too late.
No trespassing signs and a game camera, get photographic evidence. Your position will be more respected with photos, convicted of felony theft and not in jail, the guy will probably want to keep this away from his probation officer's desk.
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