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I am no longer a virgin in my divorcehood. I am now one of THOSE guys who have been with a much younger woman. I was not misleading and told her I had no interest in a relationship while I tried to sort out the pieces of my life. She told me she only wanted sex and I had declined until last night. Got to town yesterday afternoon,a few drinks, and she was smiling and touching me in a familiar way and the next thing I knew the clothes went flying. This morning she looks at me and smiles and seeks always my attention and I see the look in her eye, she has fallen. There is love and hope inside me but I have no means of expressing these things or touching them, I don't know how. I have not been with a woman for a year now and was honest in every way with her, she knew she was playing with fire and warned off many times. I am not ashamed but I am not happy either, I dont know what to do. Part of me wants to enjoy further dalliances, part of me is happy to be desired, most of me just wants to not worry about women for a time and walk away. I don't want to be one of THOSE guys, and yet here I am. How did I get here?
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