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I just started dating online and there's a guy that I'm really interested in. I sent the first message asking him about cooking (something he mentioned on his profile) and he replied back and asked me a question, I answered and then asked him another question. He answered but that was it. I asked another question and he answered and once again that was it. Because it's the internet I cant tell if he wants me to leave him alone or what? He answers have been fairly inclusive (a few sentences) so its not like he's giving me one word answers but then again it's the internet- Is there any way to tell for sure?
Dog tired from work, so this may be of no value whatsoever. You have been warned, but...
Be sure you're not just asking questions. IME, that's one of the fastest ways of developing a robotic "Ask a question, get an answer" sort of relationship, generally speaking. Balance your questions out with statements. Just randomly give him a statement, leaving room for him to direct the conversation from there, rather than always/mostly dictating (albeit unintentionally) where the the conversation has to go.
It's worth a shot. And what Mike said too, so long as you keep the above in mind for your phone conversations as well.
I feel like the Internet just makes everything harder with dating. Dating sites are bottom of the barrel, people in your local area become more reserved as a result of technology so it's not like the bars are any better, and with long-distance a lot of people are closed off to it because they are old fashioned or need body language.
I feel like the Internet just makes everything harder with dating. Dating sites are bottom of the barrel, people in your local area become more reserved as a result of technology so it's not like the bars are any better, and with long-distance a lot of people are closed off to it because they are old fashioned or need body language.
"Body language", eh? Is that what they're calling sex nowadays? (jk, I know what you mean)
What makes internet dating a necessary evil is that there just aren't many opportunities to meet someone outside work/school, church, or a bar. People aren't (or don't seem to be) as approachable nowadays as they were before. Absolutely more reserved, but I blame busyness more than I do technology. Even in Texas, the "howdy" state, I rarely felt comfortable just saying "Hi" to a woman in passing (though we guys say hi in passing to each other all the time). And that's just a quick "Hi", not "I notice you're buying Corn Flakes. I love 'em too!" So unless you're lucky enough to find someone (and the time to talk with them) at your job or school, you're screwed because everyone knows that churches and bars/clubs have one thing in common: there isn't really much variety in the type of person you can expect to meet there.
Talking mostly about small towns like mine, I guess. More places to meet people in bigger cities, but it's probably still where you have to find an excuse to strike up a conversation...
Come to think of it, you have to do this in bars/clubs too, and half the whole purpose of such an establishment is to meet someone!
"Body language", eh? Is that what they're calling sex nowadays? (jk, I know what you mean)
What makes internet dating a necessary evil is that there just aren't many opportunities to meet someone outside work/school, church, or a bar. People aren't (or don't seem to be) as approachable nowadays as they were before. Absolutely more reserved, but I blame busyness more than I do technology. Even in Texas, the "howdy" state, I rarely felt comfortable just saying "Hi" to a woman in passing (though we guys say hi in passing to each other all the time). And that's just a quick "Hi", not "I notice you're buying Corn Flakes. I love 'em too!" So unless you're lucky enough to find someone (and the time to talk with them) at your job or school, you're screwed because everyone knows that churches and bars/clubs have one thing in common: there isn't really much variety in the type of person you can expect to meet there.
Talking mostly about small towns like mine, I guess. More places to meet people in bigger cities, but it's probably still where you have to find an excuse to strike up a conversation...
Come to think of it, you have to do this in bars/clubs too, and half the whole purpose of such an establishment is to meet someone!
System's in need of an overhaul.
Definitely! My hope is to meet someone from a message board or somewhere like Yahoo Answers. Plenty of fish is also like the most unattractive people (I'm not shallow but I have standards ....) or it's all single moms, I am only 22 years old I am not fit to be a stepdaddy lol and E-harmony or something like that costs money and I am just cynical about how unromantic the idea of that kind of scientific matching is.
My friends say I should just meet a local girl but it's not that easy. I have been hoping that maybe my brother's friends might introduce a nice gal to me but it's a stroke of luck more than anything else, nothing has happened yet. And in this city - good luck trying to meet strangers in bars and coffee shops. Actually there's a couple girls I talk to online that like me and want me to visit them but they're like either not close enough to my age or I'm just not into them that way. It really sucks, all the girls I am into and that are close to my age seem to be attracted to a different type of guy than me.
Oh yeah, I've been through that a million times. This one likes me, but I like that one, but that one likes another guy. I'm a walking testimony of what I said earlier, though. I met my gf of almost five years on MySpace (local search, looking specifically for women that I might want to date). Most of the ones before her I met at school, at work, or at church when I was religious. Never met a girl I was interested in dating at a bar/club *shrugs*
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(jk, I know what you mean)
