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Have anyone here or someone you know broken an engagement? How did the families and friends react? Were you ostracized and admonished by all? Did you have to recall invitations?
I did, but we weren't far enough into the engagement to have invitations to recall/plans to cancel, etc. We were just at the beginning planning stages.
My family was thrilled beyond belief, because I was wayyyy too young and the guy was not a nice guy.
I wasn't admonished or ostracized at all. I think people understood that I made the decision that was best for me - and him. Better to call off an engagement than to get a divorce. The wedding was 8 months away so it wasn't like I left him at the altar.
He broke it off before they had even set a date. He had paid all of their bills for the past three years and all she ever talked about wasn't missing him, but was about her furor over having to pay rent, electricity, her car payment considering she made 27K a year.
She kept toying around with him, too. Saying she would give the engagement ring back if he would give her their bed so she wouldn't need to buy one. So he gave it to her and she still refused to give the ring back saying he had made a promise to her, broke that promise, now she needed it "financially" since she no longer had a partner, and if he were a good guy he wouldn't have asked for it back. (I think he was trying to return it or sell it to a friend who was married as an upgrade ring)
What a load of crap. It made me see this roommate's true colors, but at that point a lease had already been signed.
I am not friends with her, but am friends with him!
I was engaged to someone I was with for 7 years. He eventually went into the military and as a show of support I wrote him or sent him a card every single day while in boot camp. He was envied by everyone for it. After he graduated boot camp and was stationed somewhere (I can't remember) he startedi acting weird, not returning my calls. One call, I got a girl (he was living in a house with other people) and I asked for him and then I asked if she even knew him. Something sounded 'off' in her voice.
I would often have Sunday dinner at his parent's house and one Sunday he called while I was there because his mother told him to come clean with me. While we were engaged - he'd married someone else, but neglected to tell me. His parents were infuriated with him and still, to this day, I have a wonderful relationship with his mother.
I did get engaged again, many years later and he was a friend of my brother's. For some reason the whole thing didn't sit well with my brother and he was so over the top about it he refused to speak to me and still hasn't. It wasn't the only reason the engagement didn't work out but it sure was something that made it even more difficult. It just interjected so much tenonsion and filtered down from my brother to my whole family. To this day my brother won't speak to me. I stole his one an only friend and he sucked everyone for sympathy and my mother wasn't supportive of my decision and on and on. I couldn't take all the stress of the relationship, wedding planning (he and his mother were planning the whole thing and I had to constantly remind him my parents were not paying for anything) and my family on a day after day basis. I ended it. No one blinked an eye or said a thing about it.
I was engaged to someone I was with for 7 years. He eventually went into the military and as a show of support I wrote him or sent him a card every single day while in boot camp. He was envied by everyone for it. After he graduated boot camp and was stationed somewhere (I can't remember) he startedi acting weird, not returning my calls. One call, I got a girl (he was living in a house with other people) and I asked for him and then I asked if she even knew him. Something sounded 'off' in her voice.
I would often have Sunday dinner at his parent's house and one Sunday he called while I was there because his mother told him to come clean with me. While we were engaged - he'd married someone else, but neglected to tell me. His parents were infuriated with him and still, to this day, I have a wonderful relationship with his mother.
I did get engaged again, many years later and he was a friend of my brother's. For some reason the whole thing didn't sit well with my brother and he was so over the top about it he refused to speak to me and still hasn't. It wasn't the only reason the engagement didn't work out but it sure was something that made it even more difficult. It just interjected so much tenonsion and filtered down from my brother to my whole family. To this day my brother won't speak to me. I stole his one an only friend and he sucked everyone for sympathy and my mother wasn't supportive of my decision and on and on. I couldn't take all the stress of the relationship, wedding planning (he and his mother were planning the whole thing and I had to constantly remind him my parents were not paying for anything) and my family on a day after day basis. I ended it. No one blinked an eye or said a thing about it.
So he didn't just cheat, but MARRIED another woman??
It just interjected so much tenonsion and filtered down from my brother to my whole family. To this day my brother won't speak to me. I stole his one an only friend and he sucked everyone for sympathy and my mother wasn't supportive of my decision and on and on. I couldn't take all the stress of the relationship, wedding planning (he and his mother were planning the whole thing and I had to constantly remind him my parents were not paying for anything) and my family on a day after day basis. I ended it. No one blinked an eye or said a thing about it.
I would have simply cut them off if this was someone I loved, instead of letting a bunch of a$$clowns dictate to me what I can do with my life.
I have a cousin who called off a wedding to the girl he'd dated all through college a week before the ceremony. I believe it was a mutual calling off, they both realized it wasn't what they wanted. Such a late cancellation wasn't especially appreciated by people who'd already booked travel plans and hotels, but nobody was like, "You NEED to get married, because, damnit, I bought these tickets," either. People got over it. Even the people who'd put up the non-refundable dough for the venues and catering.
He did go on, several years later, to meet and marry a different woman, and I would be remiss if I didn't note that they did not get that many guests outside of immediate family who bothered to attend. Which is understandable.
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