Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So this weekend, I went to the bar. The bar I go to is a bar/restraint, and is fairly high end. The servers dress up very nice. Most of the time I go to this place to kick back a few drinks, and occasionally I go there for their overpriced, but pretty average food. But to get to the point, Friday I was leaving the restraint, and the hostess asked me 'Are you coming back?'. I said 'maybe later'. She then said 'well I would like to introduce myself to you, since I see you come in here all the time'.
I dint think I'm reading too far into this. There is no real reason for a hostess to formally introduce herself to me. I believe there is interest there. I mean the managers see me there often, but never make it a pint to introduce themselves to me. So I think some interest is there. Let's be real, if there wasn't, she wouldn't have introduced herself.
I have a natural aversion to dealing with people who work at places I commonly visit. Part of it is due to my secretive nature, as I keep most of my relationships a secret. Also, I'm not sure how to play this. A big part of me doesn't want to cross the line and over step my boundaries. How would you play this?
Can't really say if she's flirting or if it's simply good customer service. My parents befriended servers, managers, etc. at whatever restaurants they frequented often, such that when my father passed away, several staff came to the visitation at the funeral home. I think it's great to be on a first name basis with people that you see regularly. Doesn't mean they have to know anything about your "secretive" life...
Spell much?
All you need to do is go back a few more times and see what she does. You should be able to tell if she was just schmoozing up a regular, or if she is into you in particular.
What did her body language tell you? Did she offer any signals besides the words alone?
When you game a restaurant worker you have to get her interested enough that she comes to you. Remember that she works there and has a reputation with her colleagues. It would look bad on her if she dated the weird guy who came to the restaurant 3 days a week alone, never talked to anyone and always talked to her, even getting up multiple times throughout dinner/drinks to flirt with her.
Her words alone are not enough to assume anything. The hardest part for most guys, the cold approach, is over. But now comes the meat of the pickup of getting her attracted to you and then WANTING to come over to you throughout the course of the night to flirt since you're an attractive, interesting man.
Well I don't go to that place often. I only go there maybe once a week, and it's normally on weekends just to drink. I may frequent there, but I'm not there that often. The thing is, there is no reason for a hostess to really know me. I can understand a server wanting to get more personal because they benefit from this type of relationship. But a hostess really doesn't benefit at all. If it had been the manager or a waitress who walked up and introduced herself, I wouldn't mind much. But you're right, I just need to go back and see how she continues to act.
Secrets breed sickness. You need to deal with this first.
Maybe not secret, but I never let anyone know whom I'm dating. I never really officially announce it to people who know me. I just go about my normal life, and don't really talk about what relationship I'm in. I think if I actively dated a restaurant worker, other people could know, and it would feel awkward to me.
Maybe not secret, but I never let anyone know whom I'm dating. I never really officially announce it to people who know me. I just go about my normal life, and don't really talk about what relationship I'm in. I think if I actively dated a restaurant worker, other people could know, and it would feel awkward to me.
OK, so you aren't really keeping it secret; you're just a private person.
I think you need more interaction with this person to know if she's truly interested.
I have had some multiple-occasion, flirty conversations with people who I was CERTAIN were interested in me but turned out not to be. It can be very hard to tell, especially with people who work in customer service.
I have had some multiple-occasion, flirty conversations with people who I was CERTAIN were interested in me but turned out not to be. It can be very hard to tell, especially with people who work in customer service.
I worked for a Victora's Secret store in Orange county when I was a freshman in College. I have been told by my manager that we as sales associates need to be very friendly to the customers who shop there often.
Obviously "be very friendly" is subject to personal interpretation. Many men shop there thought we flirted with them, it is just not the case, we were just being friendly. =)
It is not professional to get a date from your work place. It is just tacky, especially when you work for a highend retail store (especially a chain store) or a highend restaurant.
However, this does not mean that the person who talked to OP is not interested in him. Just go with the flow. Don't overanalyze the situation. =)
She works in the hospitality industry. Many, many people confuse hospitality for flirtation. I ask the name of all my repeat customers because it helps gain/retain a good customer base, people like going to bars/restaurants where they are known as regulars and have a rapport with the staff.
Or it's possible she was being flirty. Which could mean she finds you attractive or she could just be a flirty person.
You really can't tell until you get to know her better or put yourself out there. It doesn't matter what you think or what people online tell you--only she knows.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
