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I suspect she knows you're unfaithful but stays with you for whatever reasons she has.
After OP's recent reply to my comment, I think you have the right idea, Djuna. They've got a not-so-mutual silent agreement where they both blindly think the other is an angel while reality is they're both boinking their brains out while keeping the marriage nice and sound for the tax credit. Not a bad arrangement...
After OP's recent reply to my comment, I think you have the right idea, Djuna. They've got a not-so-mutual silent agreement where they both blindly think the other is an angel while reality is they're both boinking their brains out while keeping the marriage nice and sound for the tax credit. Not a bad arrangement...
That actually wouldn't be bad. Can't have it all, unfortunately.
That actually wouldn't be bad. Can't have it all, unfortunately.
Honey, this is your fantasy you've got all of us reading about in this thread! It can be whatever you want it to be and you can have whatever you want to have! Just make it up as you go along.
I hope you are telling the truth about being in therapy. Are you also seeing a psychiatrist about medication? Are you bipolar?
It seems to me that your mental health issues are more important than the real or imagined cheating.
Yes, and so far no mental health issues that require medications. In fact, I am trusted by the public with very important information related to my work, so being of sound mind is a concern, of which I have been assured that I have met their standard.
Of course that doesn't mean there isn't anything wrong with me, which is why I have sought out the help of a professional to guide me. In every other aspect of my life, I am honest and caring. I do consider myself to be a good person, and I have no doubts about that. I have been faithful in the past, to another woman, who I was with for 3 years. That is the only person I have been faithful to, so I know I have the ability. In fact, it took no effort at all on my part to be faithful, and my therapist and I are exploring that, and in what way the relationship with my current wife is different. I sincerely hope that I find and answer, and have the desire and willpower to take necessary action, whatever that is, when it is time.
Honey, this is your fantasy you've got all of us reading about in this thread! It can be whatever you want it to be and you can have whatever you want to have! Just make it up as you go along.
I realize that you are making a valiant effort here, but I'm not biting. Although I concede you are quite good. So continue if you must.
I am not intelligent enough to be a troll, believe me. Only one person (besides myself) on this earth knows all about me (my therapist). Confession can be a tricky thing, he says. The world is like a mirror. Even though this is just the internet, a forum, I can unmask myself and I can see how the world sees me. In just the last hour I have seen how ugly it must be.
I may be a narcissist, or an egoist, or a jerk, or a douche, but I don't know it yet. I feel like I am a good person. I have many people in my life who are good to me, who love me. I don't see myself as any of these negative things. Maybe I should. That might be the point.
You are definitely NOT a good person. Sorry to break this to you. A good person doesn't do what you have done to someone they love. A good person doesn't lie and cheat. A good person wouldn't CONTINUE to do hurtful things to someone they love. Tell me, when you told your wife about your indiscretions - was she upset? Did she cry? Was she devastated? And yet you continue to cheat on her? And you view yourself as a good person? Not only do you continue to cheat on her - you go on other threads talking about your sexual experiences with other women. So, it is clear that you have not learned anything. If you really wanted to change - you would. And you wouldn't be on the internet talking about sex with other women while talking about how you are trying to become a better person. Face it - you are a lying, cheating, narcissist, egotistical jerk. Your world revolves around you. The only person you are thinking about is you. And it's obvious you want to be seen as someone with great sexual prowess - otherwise you wouldn't be posting the things you are posting on other threads. That is not what someone with a guilty conscience would do.
You are definitely NOT a good person. Sorry to break this to you. A good person doesn't do what you have done to someone they love. A good person doesn't lie and cheat. A good person wouldn't CONTINUE to do hurtful things to someone they love. Tell me, when you told your wife about your indiscretions - was she upset? Did she cry? Was she devastated? And yet you continue to cheat on her? And you view yourself as a good person? Not only do you continue to cheat on her - you go on other threads talking about your sexual experiences with other women. So, it is clear that you have not learned anything. If you really wanted to change - you would. And you wouldn't be on the internet talking about sex with other women while talking about how you are trying to become a better person. Face it - you are a lying, cheating, narcissist, egotistical jerk. Your world revolves around you. The only person you are thinking about is you. And it's obvious you want to be seen as someone with great sexual prowess - otherwise you wouldn't be posting the things you are posting on other threads. That is not what someone with a guilty conscience would do.
I realize that you are making a valiant effort here, but I'm not biting. Although I concede you are quite good. So continue if you must.
Ok, I'm being very snide with that comment which I'll stop right now; but you said it yourself:
Quote:
Originally Posted by DazedandAmused
I may be a narcissist, or an egoist, or a jerk, or a douche, but I don't know it yet. I feel like I am a good person. I have many people in my life who are good to me, who love me. I don't see myself as any of these negative things. Maybe I should. That might be the point.
You're living in a delusion where you're not taking emotional responsibility for your actions and commitments you made when marrying a partner. When I say it's your fantasy, I really mean you're living in your own la-la land. Obviously for you to feel entitled to give advice to strangers on a forum when your personal life is a complete wreck gives us all we need to know you're a little off in that head of yours.
In most ways, yes. In some ways - I have room for improvement. I did some things in my past that I'm not proud of - and I was so guilt ridden that I could barely face myself. So I changed.
Everyone makes mistakes. Good people feel guilty. Good people learn from them. Good people don't hurt the person they love over and over and over and over and over and over....
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