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I do, sometimes. Alot actually. I was good for years. It's around the past year that my want to be with someone came up again. Around mid 2013. It had nothing to do with media, society pressure. Those 2 things just contributed to the already present feelings.
Spoiler
My brother met his fiance years ago, and they're getting married in Dec. It's a big deal. I wasn't going to even go to the wedding. But I have to since his fiance wants me to be in it-kissing up to my brother I suppose.
I have cousins younger than me that have boyfriends and girlfriends already.
Some old acquaintances who have kids already
My parents are of course married.
And I heard recently from my mother another of my cousins is getting married-which I hated, as she was a cousin who was hateful and teased me alot. I was hoping she'd be single and abandoned & pregnant-but not married lol
Then I have had family, and older people ask if I was matched up yet. My uncle wants me to stay with him for the sole goal of hooking me up-wondering why I have no boyfriend yet.
None of this stuff isn't the sole reason for my desire for love. But it all is a contributor-as I do wonder when it'll be my turn.
Dating is the only time the green-eyed monster appears. I have never been jealous of a girl's money, looks, clothes, house, body, parents, etc. I can give props and say they are hot, or that I wished I had their looks, or figure, or they have great stuff. But dating is where any jealousy will come in. Not all the time, but if there is any jealousy, it's a guy involved.
But, I am not at a stage to just settle yet. Settling defeats the purpose if you feel no attraction, or connection to your partner. Rather than love and companionship, it's a chore-and miserable.
But I am focusing on other things-like school and a career. I was unmotivated for a while, so it put me behind, as I didn't know what I wanted to do. Now, I have somewhat decided-not written in stone yet, but there's room. I have a plan, which is important.
So, I plan on moving as soon as I can. And once I do, that will help some, because I don't plan to keep too much contact with my family-if any, sans my parents, and not much there. Just be completely on my own, with a clean slate started, and none of my previous family or acquaintances knowing what I am up to. Least that's what I would like, but it'll be hard. Going to school, and working, to pay for an apartment will not be cheap.
Last edited by HappyRain; 08-04-2014 at 01:10 PM..
I feel so out of the norm here. I'm in a city where everyone appears to date and marry early. I'm 30, going to be 31 in October and really just hitting my stride as far as career success and personal independence.
I was dating a girl recently that I mentioned we are on and off. She is 26. I don't think she is the "one" for me and have a fear of settling. She likes that I'm out of the norm here...single, attractive, great career...oh and icing on the cake, no kids no ex wife.
I recently met a woman that is 32. She seems sweet, but I'm not sure if her life goals are aligned with mine. We hit it off but we will see how it goes.
Meanwhile I see on my Facebook and see in my personal life that people are getting engaged, people I wouldn't expect. People announcing relationships. I've encountered a lot of people who are dating and serious relationships.
Part of me wonders if there's something wrong with me for not finding the 'one' yet, besides me being a late bloomer, or do these people have nothing better else to do than get married and have kids?
I DO want the wife and kids in my life, but just not with the wrong person. Sometimes I do get envious of people having that happiness, but there's still things I want to accomplish before crossing that line.
Does anyone else feel that way?
It doesn't matter what anyone else does, you have to do what's right for you. Dude, you're only 30! I'm a 44-year-old never-married, child-free female. People not only think someone like me is a freak, they will practically say it to my face. Now it doesn't happen anymore because I've been in a relationship for 2 years, but I can't imagine anyone thinking twice about a single 30-year-old male.
I'm from the DC area where you would be the rule, rather than the exception, but even now that I live in small-town southwestern Virginia I still think you'd fit in, even if you didn't have any ex-wives or kids.
At some point, you have to tell yourself you are doing what's right for you. I've always taken pride in the fact that I was holding out/held out for the right person and didn't settle for the wrong one. Not everyone can meet their life partner before the age of 30 (and it's my personal belief no one should get married before age 30). You're doing just fine!
It doesn't matter what anyone else does, you have to do what's right for you. Dude, you're only 30! I'm a 44-year-old never-married, child-free female. People not only think someone like me is a freak, they will practically say it to my face. Now it doesn't happen anymore because I've been in a relationship for 2 years, but I can't imagine anyone thinking twice about a single 30-year-old male.
I'm from the DC area where you would be the rule, rather than the exception, but even now that I live in small-town southwestern Virginia I still think you'd fit in, even if you didn't have any ex-wives or kids.
At some point, you have to tell yourself you are doing what's right for you. I've always taken pride in the fact that I was holding out/held out for the right person and didn't settle for the wrong one. Not everyone can meet their life partner before the age of 30 (and it's my personal belief no one should get married before age 30). You're doing just fine!
I used to live in the DC area I know it's common.
It's funny, because I just went to get something for lunch and one of the 26 year old's friend was a bit cold towards me and acting weird. She knows that her and I had some strife and that I wasn't really into her friend.
People are hating on me because I made the decision that I'm not really into the girl. But then again everyone else is in a relationship and settling down. For some reason I either get admiration that I'm 30 and single or hints of disdain because I haven't settled for someone or their friend. Even lies and rumors spread.
It's funny, because I just went to get something for lunch and one of the 26 year old's friend was a bit cold towards me and acting weird. She knows that her and I had some strife and that I wasn't really into her friend.
People are hating on me because I made the decision that I'm not really into the girl. But then again everyone else is in a relationship and settling down. For some reason I either get admiration that I'm 30 and single or hints of disdain because I haven't settled for someone or their friend. Even lies and rumors spread.
A small-town atmosphere can be brutal that way. Any option to move? Especially to a more liberal area, where being single at 30 is normal?
Considering it. I am in a better position now because of how my career is going, but I like my job right now.
I may move within six months or so but not sure. I certainly entertained the idea.
This could be a good way to go. But if you like your job, wait and see how things pan out with that 32-year old.
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