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I had a fling with one of them (she happens to be one of my closest friends now), but it didn't work out. I guess you could say there wasn't that spark. The other close female friend that I consider one of my confidants has been in a (crappy) relationship since the four months I've known her. She's kind of flirty with me, and I'm attracted to her, so I don't know if that ever become something more than it is now.
Ask them out on a second date, if they say they would like to go but don't know their schedule, then say ok, let me know when you're free. Leave it at that. They'll be calling you in a few days if you just LEAVE THEM ALONE.
Drives a woman nuts when you show her that you really don't have to have her around.
I'm not hounding them or anything like that. I usually send one text after the date indicating I had a good time and asking if they want to go out again soon. The last girl I took out last week hasn't responded to me since my last text to her yesterday. This is the sort of thing that's been happening. I just wish I could figure out what these women's expectations are and how I'm not meeting them.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lafleur
I'm not hounding them or anything like that. I usually send one text after the date indicating I had a good time and asking if they want to go out again soon. The last girl I took out last week hasn't responded to me since my last text to her yesterday. This is the sort of thing that's been happening. I just wish I could figure out what these women's expectations are and how I'm not meeting them.
It might have nothing to do with expectations. They probably just didn't feel a spark. It's usually that simple.
This. And I can go out and have a perfectly fun date, enjoy meeting the person, have a nice conversation, think they're physically attractive and have no desire to see the person again romantically. That's perfectly normal. There needs to be something else there.
This is what I'm trying to figure out. What am I not bringing to the table? It's funny. Before my last date that ended up not working out, I stopped at a bar to catch a little of a football game and kill some time. There was a young couple next to me and they were talking about their financial woes. The guy was talking about dumping a bunch of money into his car and not being able to afford to drive it. It also sounded like he was a paycheck-to-paycheck guy. And yet, despite being in somewhat of a financial mess, he had a girlfriend right there next to him (at least I'm assuming it was his GF by the way they were talking). What is it that someone like that has that I don't? That's what I'm trying to figure out. I'm missing that edge, apparently, to keep the woman attracted to me beyond the first date.
I'm not hounding them or anything like that. I usually send one text after the date indicating I had a good time and asking if they want to go out again soon. The last girl I took out last week hasn't responded to me since my last text to her yesterday. This is the sort of thing that's been happening. I just wish I could figure out what these women's expectations are and how I'm not meeting them.
If you knew what they expected, would you try to change into something you're not, just to date them???
I went out Saturday night (it was my birthday), and I met a 33 y/o woman at one of the last bars I went to. We talked for a little bit and she went on and on about her fertility woes (whoa there!). However, I figured I'd give it a chance and asked her if she'd like to go out sometime. She agreed and gave me her number. I texted her yesterday and never heard back from her. So I can't even attract the baby-obsessed women either.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lafleur
This is what I'm trying to figure out. What am I not bringing to the table? It's funny. Before my last date that ended up not working out, I stopped at a bar to catch a little of a football game and kill some time. There was a young couple next to me and they were talking about their financial woes. The guy was talking about dumping a bunch of money into his car and not being able to afford to drive it. It also sounded like he was a paycheck-to-paycheck guy. And yet, despite being in somewhat of a financial mess, he had a girlfriend right there next to him (at least I'm assuming it was his GF by the way they were talking). What is it that someone like that has that I don't? That's what I'm trying to figure out. I'm missing that edge, apparently, to keep the woman attracted to me beyond the first date.
It's called chemistry. You can't bring it, or not bring it. It is there, or it isn't. It's elusive!
Ignore most of the stuff posted by people on this forum re what you need. Making a connection IS NOT like a shopping list: job, car, education... all set! Those things will get you dates, but that is it. It's about finding a spark, an elusive spark.
You just haven't met the right person for you.
And maybe try following up with a phone call instead of text. Different people like different things. My current ladyfriend HATES talking on the phone, other women hate texting.
If the majority are from OKC, then stop dating women from OKC. Problem solved. No need to vent, rant, or rave. There is no law telling you that you have to date at all, just like there is no law saying they have to go out with you more than once. Ignoring you after one date means they didn't like you, not that they are terrible women like you seem to think.
Wow, calm down. I never said they were terrible women. I'm trying to figure out what it is they don't like about me.
I went out Saturday night (it was my birthday), and I met a 33 y/o woman at one of the last bars I went to. We talked for a little bit and she went on and on about her fertility woes (whoa there!). However, I figured I'd give it a chance and asked her if she'd like to go out sometime. She agreed and gave me her number. I texted her yesterday and never heard back from her. So I can't even attract the baby-obsessed women either.
You sound desperate. And if you sound that way through this messageboard, do you think it's possible you're giving off that vibe in person?
You sent a text and she didn't jump on it right away so you've already written her off. Even if she isn't interested, she doesn't have to be, just because you were willing to give her a chance. Were you truly interested in her in the first place or was her being single the only criteria you needed to give out your number?
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). However, I figured I'd give it a chance and asked her if she'd like to go out sometime. She agreed and gave me her number. I texted her yesterday and never heard back from her. So I can't even attract the baby-obsessed women either. 
