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I'm considering lying about my age since the age range I'm looking for (30-40) stops the search at 39. I'm 46, but look younger so why not.
Even at 46 are you finding women mid to late 30s don't respond? Compared to the 40 somethings in my area you do look younger (I would have guessed late 30s) and in much better shape. The only negative I could see was the clothing does read closer to your actual age.
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Originally Posted by glenmorangie
Also, there's nothing keeping YOU from searching the 30-40s and sending a message acknowledging that you may be X amount of years outside her age range preference, but that you like her profile and really connect with the part where she says she [insert detail of hers from her profile to prove you read it]. And then you ask whether she'd be up for talking a bit more.
I am early 30s and I search up to 10 years older.But I think if you took this approach you could potentially have success.
Not all men struggle. The good-looking men have plenty of options. Unfortunately, the average man is just average and will struggle online.
I'm sure average men do struggle but I know plenty of average men who've had success. Some are already married and I know a few others who will be engaged by Christmas.
Your challenges with dating are due to internal reasons, not external.
Even at 46 are you finding women mid to late 30s don't respond? Compared to the 40 somethings in my area you do look younger (I would have guessed late 30s) and in much better shape. The only negative I could see was the clothing does read closer to your actual age.
I am early 30s and I search up to 10 years older.But I think if you took this approach you could potentially have success.
I do think its location. Everyone gets married at 23 in Oklahoma. I'm looking to move. I know I'd have better luck back in Atlanta. Thanks for the compliment. I have bought lots of new clothes since those pic were taken. Thanks for giving me some hope though.
Same from the male POV. The main difference is that women that I contact first rarely respond because of guy spam. So for the males that leaves the undesirable women that contact us first and the desirable women that we contact but don't reciprocate.
I've contacted many men first. Is it the act of contacting you first that makes us undesirable, or is it that the undesirable women are more likely to contact first? B/c really, I've had some luck with it and many times the men ended up being a lot more into me than me into them.
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Originally Posted by Lafleur
Why don't you just state this in your profile? And I don't think it's all about having a professional position. Educated people want to hang out with other educated people. Unfortunately, because you don't have a college degree, the presumption is going to be that you wouldn't be able to click with them or their inner circle. People don't think it makes a difference, but it does. I can typically tell a significant difference between someone who's educated from a good college and someone who only has a HS diploma or GED. It's the way they think, the way they talk, the way they carry themselves, etc. In most cases, not all.
I think you're going to turn off a lot of people and tarnish your reputation if you start lying on your dating profile. Like I said, if I found out you were lying, I would immediately lose interest in you.
I agree about turning off people who hate lying, and don't you want to be with someone who hates lies? I mean, honestly. LOL.
Here's how I feel about the education thing though--I have my bachelor's degree but I don't necessarily expect the same or more from a man. I care much more about how he's educated himself since he got out of school. Does he read books or watch good documentaries? Is he curious about the world or does he hole himself up and watch TV or hang out with the buds every night? These things will show in a well written profile but don't lie or you'll just end up having to keep up an act every single day of the relationship and I'd much rather be myself than to feel I have to play a part.
The reason I feel this way is b/c some of the most interesting and intelligent people I know just don't get along with school all that well--they want to do it their way. People either have some intellectual interests or they don't and that goes for those with PhD's as well as high school dropouts.
And Lowonluck, I've said this before and I"ll say it again--what a self fulfilling forum name--if you continue to think of yourself that way you will keep attracting more bad luck.
I'm sure average men do struggle but I know plenty of average men who've had success. Some are already married and I know a few others who will be engaged by Christmas.
Your challenges with dating are due to internal reasons, not external.
^^ Of course they are. Remember, for every woman getting into a relationship is a man getting into the same relationship. And yes, the majority will be average men. And how did these guys get there? By going on dates until they found the right person. It's not sorcery.
Some of our Struggling Guysâ„¢ seem to forget that and their logic gets all crazy. They need to realize they are not "average" but statistical outliers. They need to look hard at themselves before working their mystery math.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck
So now we know what your real issue with me is... Your opinion is skewed because you have issues with public assistance. I do not need it, but I do qualify for it, so I do accept it. It helps keep me in a good place financially. But whatever, your opinion means nothing.
I do not have issues with people that need public assistance taking it. None at all.
I have issues with people being delusional that think they are doing well financially, and they're buying multiple cars, while taking it. If you were doing well financially you would not qualify for public assistance.
Huge difference.
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Originally Posted by Cristo666
She has an almost infinite number of options and dates multiple men, while these men may only have her to go out with. So she has a tremendous amount of choices, while the men have next to none.
Men have just as much choice. Heck, for every woman going out, a guy is going out. The few guys I know doing it now go out multiple times a week. I'm bald, average looking (at best), etc... nothing at all special, yet I easily had multiple dates a week with cute women in OLD. It's easy.
I do not have issues with people that need public assistance taking it. None at all.
I have issues with people being delusional that think they are doing well financially, and they're buying multiple cars, while taking it. If you were doing well financially you would not qualify for public assistance.
Huge difference.
I'll go one further and say if she was telling the truth to the government about her savings and assets she would not qualify.
Presumably, since the father of her oldest is dead, and assuming she is the upstanding citizen she proclaims to be, she and that child qualify for his social security benefits as well.
Because surely this paragon of virtue would never dream of having a baby with a man she wasn't married to...
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