Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This guy and I met a year and a half ago at school, became friends and really clicked. He even seemed to slightly court me at first, was seemed sweet and caring (buying me food without asking for instance when he'd know I didn't have time to have a breakfast), he'd compliment me, walk me to my bus stop each evening, was really flirty and a bit touchy-feely, but he never clearly mentionned he was interested, and he had a girlfriend. He dumped her a few weeks after we had met, he told me, out of the blue (regarding his attitude towards me, I had no idea he had a gf and he never mentioned her). He kept being gentle for a little bit and I was slowly falling for him, then he suddenly changed.
He was becoming more distant. He was still nice and even kind of caring, but he started to be more distant and to make jokes about me I found undelicate (I think he has this humour with his close guy friends, but he didn't have it with me the first weeks, he was very charming and gentle, considerate). He said it was just humour, but it felt aggressive towards me sometimes and i'm not one of his guy friends. But he also was still around, asking to see me, have lunch together, flirtig/complimenting me, telling me he was worried when I wouldn't give news for a little while.
A few months after we had met, my dad found a job elsewhere and we had to move to a different town. We had already become a bit more distant at this point, but still shared a nice connection (when he wasn't making too many lame jokes). I distanced myself cause his attitude was hurting me, and I had started to like him and felt like there was no hope. There were many unsaid things between us, at least on my side. But judging from his weird changes of attitudes, also on his maybe. Also I was missing the nice one from the beginning, and having the impression that this jokingly attitude was all I could get from him was hurting me. I think I wanted a bit more, it made me feel like I didn't matter to him and like he wasn't taking me seriously.
He asked for news a few weeks after I had left, but the correspondence died fast after I had replied. He was busy with important and urgent things in his life, but well. He called me once weeks after, but to ask for help for stg... and made bad/insensitive jokes again, I was offended and felt used, we had a fight on Skype. I told him what i thought about his attitude, that i was tired of it, he seemed offended, he blamed me, said I lacked humour and had a problem with him. His offensive jokes would maybe hurt me less if I didn't have feelings for him, and he doesn't know I like him, but I just couldn't spit it out and explain myself and I was so sick and tired of his behaviour... I felt like he didn't deserve such a confession. He didn't even deserve a romantic interest actually.
We talked again a bit after that (he needed to ask me something, again) but I voluntarily distanced myself and stopped showing signs of affection when we'd talk, and he was distant too. I was feeling like he was using me. I was very neutral, sometimes a bit disagreeable... I was tired of being so hurt and mistreated. I could feel things were weird, awkward, disagreable in our interactions, the little sparkle was gone i guess. It's been 10 months and we haven't talked since then. He said he should talk to each other again and blablabla but I don't know if he meant it, and he hasn't even asked for news since then, not once. His behaviour disappointed and hurt me so much that I don't feel like contacting him again to be honest. I'd be scared of starting to like him again and have my ego and feelings hurt again. He hasn't apologized about his behaviour, while a year ago we would talk everyday, and he was caring. He knows that I'm in a difficult period and very stressing period right now, he doesn't try to ask how I am or to offer me support, even if I did support him when he needed me eventhough his attitude didn't quite encourage me to do so and it was a bit painful for me. Again, contacting him would be a bad idea anyways, but I just think I have more reasons to put distance than he does, and the fact that he isn't trying to reach at me at all shows how littler he cares about me I guess.
What do u think happenned , does it look like we're never gonna be in touch again? How can people/guys change so fast, have you ever experienced that and is there anything to do?
This guy and I met a year and a half ago at school, became friends and really clicked. He even seemed to slightly court me at first, was seemed sweet and caring (buying me food without asking for instance when he'd know I didn't have time to have a breakfast), he'd compliment me, walk me to my bus stop each evening, was really flirty and a bit touchy-feely, but he never clearly mentionned he was interested, and he had a girlfriend. He dumped her a few weeks after we had met, he told me, out of the blue (regarding his attitude towards me, I had no idea he had a gf and he never mentioned her). He kept being gentle for a little bit and I was slowly falling for him, then he suddenly changed.
He was becoming more distant. He was still nice and even kind of caring, but he started to be more distant and to make jokes about me I found undelicate (I think he has this humour with his close guy friends, but he didn't have it with me the first weeks, he was very charming and gentle, considerate). He said it was just humour, but it felt aggressive towards me sometimes and i'm not one of his guy friends. But he also was still around, asking to see me, have lunch together, flirtig/complimenting me, telling me he was worried when I wouldn't give news for a little while.
A few months after we had met, my dad found a job elsewhere and we had to move to a different town. We had already become a bit more distant at this point, but still shared a nice connection (when he wasn't making too many lame jokes). I distanced myself cause his attitude was hurting me, and I had started to like him and felt like there was no hope. There were many unsaid things between us, at least on my side. But judging from his weird changes of attitudes, also on his maybe. Also I was missing the nice one from the beginning, and having the impression that this jokingly attitude was all I could get from him was hurting me. I think I wanted a bit more, it made me feel like I didn't matter to him and like he wasn't taking me seriously.
He asked for news a few weeks after I had left, but the correspondence died fast after I had replied. He was busy with important and urgent things in his life, but well. He called me once weeks after, but to ask for help for stg... and made bad/insensitive jokes again, I was offended and felt used, we had a fight on Skype. I told him what i thought about his attitude, that i was tired of it, he seemed offended, he blamed me, said I lacked humour and had a problem with him. His offensive jokes would maybe hurt me less if I didn't have feelings for him, and he doesn't know I like him, but I just couldn't spit it out and explain myself and I was so sick and tired of his behaviour... I felt like he didn't deserve such a confession. He didn't even deserve a romantic interest actually.
We talked again a bit after that (he needed to ask me something, again) but I voluntarily distanced myself and stopped showing signs of affection when we'd talk, and he was distant too. I was feeling like he was using me. I was very neutral, sometimes a bit disagreeable... I was tired of being so hurt and mistreated. I could feel things were weird, awkward, disagreable in our interactions, the little sparkle was gone i guess. It's been 10 months and we haven't talked since then. He said he should talk to each other again and blablabla but I don't know if he meant it, and he hasn't even asked for news since then, not once. His behaviour disappointed and hurt me so much that I don't feel like contacting him again to be honest. I'd be scared of starting to like him again and have my ego and feelings hurt again. He hasn't apologized about his behaviour, while a year ago we would talk everyday, and he was caring. He knows that I'm in a difficult period and very stressing period right now, he doesn't try to ask how I am or to offer me support, even if I did support him when he needed me eventhough his attitude didn't quite encourage me to do so and it was a bit painful for me. Again, contacting him would be a bad idea anyways, but I just think I have more reasons to put distance than he does, and the fact that he isn't trying to reach at me at all shows how littler he cares about me I guess.
What do u think happenned , does it look like we're never gonna be in touch again? How can people/guys change so fast, have you ever experienced that and is there anything to do?
I think he thought of you mainly as a platonic friend. As he got to know you and be more comfortable, he started to treat you like his other friends and began joking around with you. You got offended and he decided to pull back because it sounds like he doesn't really like being friends with someone who is so easily offended by his humor.
For your part, you made the following mistakes:
- Continuing to hang around with a guy in whom you had a romantic interest who had a girlfriend.
- Having feelings for a guy and not letting him know and then getting offended when he acts in ways that are just treating you like one of his buddies.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
