Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So I started talking to this military guy like a few weeks ago and he is awesome! We actually started talking 2 years ago and then stopped and he joined the military and he messaged me randomly one day to catch up. So my friend has friends in the area he is stationed and she's going in July so I figure why not go with and meet him and see how it goes? He seems to want a serious relationship. The issue is I'm in panics what if he doesn't like me? What if he does how can I start a relationship with someone who doesn't live near me, that's a huge risk of wasting the few young years I have left. I just am afraid on every level of this but it's not like I'm dating anyone here so I could do it. Im off the sites and apps and I'm just so bored in life, my job is awesome but I won't meet husbands there and I literally am exhausted after work so I'm not in any clubs or gyms or anything. I'm wasting my life basically. I just want him to meet me and fall in love on sight and marry me and then I'll quit my job and move to him. That's my dream even though I know that won't happen. How do I handle this situation?
I just want him to meet me and fall in love on sight and marry me and then I'll quit my job and move to him. That's my dream even though I know that won't happen. How do I handle this situation?
Advice... stop thinking the stuff I highlighted above.
You are going to meet a guy.
That's all.
Meet.a.guy.
BTW... having a job in your major is NOT wasting your life.
Advice... stop thinking the stuff I highlighted above.
You are going to meet a guy.
That's all.
Meet.a.guy.
BTW... having a job in your major is NOT wasting your life.
I admit I totally love my job I have an office and everything and my first client liked me it seems. I love it! It's not wasting my time but I also felt so sad being there, everyone EVERYONE in my office is married. They aren't that much older than me. It was awful.
How do you handle it? Don't go into it with the openly discernible desperation you've exhibited here.
How do I do that I feel like I have been kind of desperate in texts but I'm trying to not be. If he doesn't like me it'll just be another lost opportunity for me
You are walking into this with very high expectations. If I went into a first date with someone who said all that you just said to me, I'd be gone very fast.
How do I do that I feel like I have been kind of desperate in texts but I'm trying to not be. If he doesn't like me it'll just be another lost opportunity for me
Stop picturing him as a potential husband, which will blind you to his faults, and just go there with the intention of getting to know him.
So I started talking to this military guy like a few weeks ago and he is awesome! We actually started talking 2 years ago and then stopped and he joined the military and he messaged me randomly one day to catch up. So my friend has friends in the area he is stationed and she's going in July so I figure why not go with and meet him and see how it goes? He seems to want a serious relationship. The issue is I'm in panics what if he doesn't like me? What if he does how can I start a relationship with someone who doesn't live near me, that's a huge risk of wasting the few young years I have left. I just am afraid on every level of this but it's not like I'm dating anyone here so I could do it. Im off the sites and apps and I'm just so bored in life, my job is awesome but I won't meet husbands there and I literally am exhausted after work so I'm not in any clubs or gyms or anything. I'm wasting my life basically. I just want him to meet me and fall in love on sight and marry me and then I'll quit my job and move to him. That's my dream even though I know that won't happen. How do I handle this situation?
You're forgetting that it's not all about him liking you; you may not like him. IMO you're in too needy and vulnerable a state to get involved with something like this. And with a long-distance relationship, you have no way of getting to know him on a real level; everything will be filtered through his own mental censor in his correspondence with you. You won't know if he's seeing other women or hiring prostitutes, if he has violent tendencies and/or unresolved trauma, or anything else about his character. You also seem to be assuming that he would be capable of supporting both himself AND you. You don't even know him, haven't even seen him, and you're already looking for him to rescue you from your boredom.
If your job is awesome, hang onto it and be grateful for it. Look for something to do on the weekends--hobby groups, volunteering, folk dancing/swing/salsa dancing, whatever. It doesn't have to be a big thing, but it will get you out there and circulating.
You are very desperate, and he will notice it. That's not good. Your anxiety might mess up the meeting.
You should stop focusing on this guy as your only opportunity in life. If it works out - great. If not - there will be other opportunities. You don't "need" to be married, because others around you are.
How do I do that I feel like I have been kind of desperate in texts but I'm trying to not be. If he doesn't like me it'll just be another lost opportunity for me
What do you mean, it will be a lost opportunity? Do you expect to like all the strangers you meet? If you go and check him out, at least you will have tried to meet someone, though I don't think this is the way to go about it. Look at all the people who do online dating and real-life networking & dating; they meet tons of people they don't click with, but no one labels that a bunch of "lost opportunities". That's weird. Meeting people to see if you click is part of the process, and you won't click with about 80-90% of the people out there. You need to be more realistic.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
