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You said it yourself you liked it when guys approached where there was obvious mutual attraction, I take it as their looks didn't give you that predatory vibe. I maybe wrong but I doubt it.
Look ~ in any & all situations, I go on vibes, and I'm picking up a weird one here, so I'm going to leave this thread now. lol. Please stop talking to me.
Oh for heaven's sake, I hear this over and over again on here, it must be CD-R's Number One cliche..."obese" "single mothers" with kids "by more than one father". Where on earth are you guys finding your girlfriends? Reality TV?
I have to be honest: the way you're presenting yourself here, you are NOT exactly a catch. Therefore, if you really are attracting the mythical but ever-popular-on-CD obese single mother with multiple children from multiple exes, it may be that they realize you and they are on about the same page quality-wise...I mean overall.
Perhaps you should start improving yourself and see what happens. Because I know many, many, many very average-looking men in very happy relationships and I don't know if I know ANY of these ubiquitous fat single slobby sleep-around mutli-dad chicks as you illustrate here. Obviously, average guys CAN have wonderful relationships with wonderful women. Period. You can't. You need to find out why, and the one thing I guarantee is that it WILL start with you. Good luck.
I'm below average and you're right I will have wonderful relationships definitely not in America because of my looks but somewhere .
Anything that puts them in repeated contact with women who will be able to get to know them over time.
Sure what you suggest is merely an exercise in futility. If you are unattractive there is no more chance of this working than cold approach. The best thing unattractive men can do is find hobbies and activities, such as travel, have plenty of friends/family and they can have a full life without relationships.
Sure what you suggest is merely an exercise in futility. If you are unattractive there is no more chance of this working than cold approach. The best thing unattractive men can do is find hobbies and activities, such as travel, have plenty of friends/family and they can have a full life without relationships.
Are you gentlemen saying there really aren't any very average, very plain-looking (to be nice) men out there with women?
Have you ever been on a walkabout around town or a city and looked around at the couples?
Or been at a party and looked at the couples?
Or hell...at a family gathering, looking at the couples?
Go outside and see for yourself. I've said this over and over.
Go out to a public place and spend a few hours. You'll be shocked at the amount of below average looking men that are walking hand in hand with women. Some are also not good looking, some of the women aren't bad looking though.
If you're coming off as either really, really uncomfortable or somewhat menacing, or else on the make, so to speak, those could be reasons.
I'm not saying you are, LOL. I'm sure you're a nice guy. But just smiling and making eye contact won't automatically garner a smile back. As a woman, I can say that if a guy seems to be "on the make" (even subtly...remember, we women are pretty good with subtlety ), and I don't want that, I will make sure to NOT meet his eyes.
People who aren't great socially have a real disadvantage with this sort of stuff, because they're always asking for a road map of what to "do" and then "doing" it woodenly, or too enthusiastically or just otherwise just left of center and making their intended target uncomfortable.
I don't say that coldly, BTW. I have had to literally teach myself how to be social, it has taken decades and I still don't always get it right. People who aren't naturally very social can't just do "all the right things" and have people fall into their lap...it doesn't work that way. Hard to explain and probably impossible to cover all in one post.
Don't despair, don't give up, but you may have some things you need to start working on. Just one formula, 1 + 2 = 3 (smile + eye contact = response from woman) won't work if it doesn't come naturally to you. Most of all, just keep doing it and trying to feel relaxed and natural. Don't make it all more intense than it should be. And keep smiling and saying hello. Over time, you'll get it.
Forget all of the other advice OP,
This is the best. It's very encouraging and at least JerZ knows what you are going through.
Sure what you suggest is merely an exercise in futility. If you are unattractive there is no more chance of this working than cold approach. The best thing unattractive men can do is find hobbies and activities, such as travel, have plenty of friends/family and they can have a full life without relationships.
Some of you guys need to get out of your parents' basements and venture out into the real world and start interacting with actual live people. If you did this, you would quickly see that there are plenty of not-so-attractive guys with great women.
Just because you don't have the social skills or personality to attract any woman doesn't mean that all other not-so-attractive guys are the same.
Are you gentlemen saying there really aren't any very average, very plain-looking (to be nice) men out there with women?
Have you ever been on a walkabout around town or a city and looked around at the couples?
Or been at a party and looked at the couples?
Or hell...at a family gathering, looking at the couples?
Have you ever been outside your front door?
My definition of unattractive is based on more than looks. I learned years ago if women are not interested there is very little that will change that. Not only do I get out but I go to NYC four times a year and Quebec City at least twice a year amongst other places.
My definition of unattractive is based on more than looks. I learned years ago if women are not interested there is very little that will change that. Not only do I get out but I go to NYC four times a year and Quebec City at least twice a year amongst other places.
So you're saying you're unattractive in ways other than looks. Can't you work on changing that? MOST people have to work on ourselves in many different ways. Often that's down to maturing and learning about other people and becoming less self-centered as we are when we're children, but there are other things we may need to work on. I don't think it's "not being oneself" to work on things that are making us flat-our miserable (i.e. keeping us lonely and alone) - indeed, often those particular traits that we think of as "being ourselves!!!" were actually negative reactions; for example, being shy because of having been yelled at as children for speaking out, or being too prone to anger because we came from a large family and were bullied by siblings, or a million other possibilities. Why not work on yourself?
This is the best. It's very encouraging and at least JerZ knows what you are going through.
I just red som of the op's other threads and it looks like he has never had a positive experience with dating and if that's the case I don't think there is anyone here who could give him advice that will help.
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what you suggest is merely an exercise in futility. If you are unattractive there is no more chance of this working than cold approach. The best thing unattractive men can do is find hobbies and activities, such as travel, have plenty of friends/family and they can have a full life without relationships.
), and I don't want that, I will make sure to NOT meet his eyes.
