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I don't think I'll find her either. I had chances when I was younger. But I married the wrong woman, and by the time we got divorced, the whole dating scene had completely changed. I can't navigate it. Its hard when the hope of meeting someone and having a family is gone. People who suffer from loneliness for long periods of time ted to die younger. Its a fact. We're not meant to go through life alone. I've been doing it for way too long and its depressing. At least I have my pet,but I'd be so much happier with the right woman.
OP. The relationship you want is one you have to build. It doesn't just magically appear one day. But you do need to find someone who wants to build that kind of life, together, permanently. It might be that you've made the mistake of putting too high a priority on looks or how much money he has. I know people that look like a physical mismatch, and their living circumstances are not "the American Dream" , but they're happy.
Me too. I just don't like the mindset of "relationship or bust" that comes with dating online. IRL, I can be friends with people and get to know them and their friends and then decide whether I want to date them. The last 2 "relationships" I had online were men who acted very much into me before we went to bed, but afterwards I got downgraded to FWB, which is I think what they were looking for to begin with but they were not honest in their intentions. But yeah, the online thing almost feels to me like a formula and like the men I've run into don't take it seriously.
Likewise here. A couple of different women with whom I thought there was strong chemistry, but after some bedroom time [they] became flaky. Seems that OLD is full of players and even in our older years, these people act like high school/college kids. I've actually told one, "You're acting like a damn immature teenybopper. GROW UP! You're not in your 20s anymore. In a few years, you're gonna be facing your golden years!"
I actually found “the one" and then he died when I was only 33. My husband wasn't perfect but he was perfect for me and now I'm afraid that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life because I already had my one chance at true love.
I don't know if there is anyone else out there that I will ever really connect with again. I'm not giving up yet but I doubt that I'll find love a second time. Definitely not with the same intensity as the first time at least.
I don't believe that's how it works. I was with my late husband for 18 years and with my current husband for five.
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Likewise here. A couple of different women with whom I thought there was strong chemistry, but after some bedroom time [they] became flaky. Seems that OLD is full of players and even in our older years, these people act like high school/college kids. I've actually told one, "You're acting like a damn immature teenybopper. GROW UP! You're not in your 20s anymore. In a few years, you're gonna be facing your golden years!"
I had to say something similar to a man in his 40s. His response was "Can't argue with you there!" lol
Likewise here. A couple of different women with whom I thought there was strong chemistry, but after some bedroom time [they] became flaky. Seems that OLD is full of players and even in our older years, these people act like high school/college kids. I've actually told one, "You're acting like a damn immature teenybopper. GROW UP! You're not in your 20s anymore. In a few years, you're gonna be facing your golden years!"
I think this happens for 2 reasons. Either you have already went down the monogamy road and got burned badly, or you are so busy that you really don't have time to actually pursue a relationship. The issue I see with many people seeking relationships, and I was this person not too many years ago, is that they like the sound of "relationship", but they don't have the time or energy to make an actual "relationship" work. Sure, there's going to be people who seem like their relationship is effortless. You know how much has to go just right within that relationship for it to seem effortless? For the majority of us, it's going to take work from both sides in order to make that relationship bear fruit. I think people lose sight of that and think it will just magically work. Not at all. Grass doesn't grow and stay green without being cared for.
I think this happens for 2 reasons. Either you have already went down the monogamy road and got burned badly, or you are so busy that you really don't have time to actually pursue a relationship. The issue I see with many people seeking relationships, and I was this person not too many years ago, is that they like the sound of "relationship", but they don't have the time or energy to make an actual "relationship" work. Sure, there's going to be people who seem like their relationship is effortless. You know how much has to go just right within that relationship for it to seem effortless? For the majority of us, it's going to take work from both sides in order to make that relationship bear fruit. I think people lose sight of that and think it will just magically work. Not at all. Grass doesn't grow and stay green without being cared for.
I feel that's another issue I've run into (especially from OLD). The women I've pursued just don't seem interested in forming a relationship, even though they're on OLD and claiming they want to.
I feel that's another issue I've run into (especially from OLD). The women I've pursued just don't seem interested in forming a relationship, even though they're on OLD and claiming they want to.
I would imagine the culprit is just plain ole options. You like a little bit about this person, a little bit about that person, and a little bit about the other person. Instead of forging forward with one person and taking a risk, you hedge your bets and continue to communicate with all 3 people. Relationship wise, if you want it to prosper, you have to make a decision and see it through till the end, whether the end is hell or bliss. You can leave if it's hell. Most people don't want to see hell, so they just bypass the experience all together and just pursue casually.
I definitely think we, meaning Americans, expect way too much from a spouse. We want them to be perfect when we are far from perfect. It's not realistic to expect your husband or wife to be everything to you.
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