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I really do not think there is anything we can say which will persuade you to man-up and break it off. Even if you did, in this situation many people go back because one party begs the other...
Realise that there are millions of men who would like to have their cake and eat it too. Wifey back at home making dinner and excitement and great sex off in the hotel, but as others have said, someone who is dishonest in this way to his wife and kids will be dishonest in the future to you too.
Maybe this is a lesson you have to learn. If it is, then I hope you learn it at the end of the first time, because some people continue to make the same mistakes in their life over and over again and it makes their life hell for them.
The Universe gives us opportunities to get it right and if one opportunity (such as this) does not drive in the lesson into our thick heads, then there will always be others which will be presented in different ways which will hopefully allow us to get the point of the lesson we have to learn.
OK now that I have more time, I have one more thought to add, OP.
You have to stop this ASAP because as exciting as people try to make affairs out to be, they suck. It's ALL about lying. And yeah, you're cheating his wife etc, but you really are cheating yourself.
You're lying all the time. You're sneaking around. You're hiding part of your life. And you agree to let HIM keep you a secret, as if you are not worth knowing legitimately. Think about that for a second.
You are basically agreeing that you are not worth bringing out into the light. You are only worth sneaking into a hotel for a few hours, then covering your tracks later.
It's not hot. It's not sexy. It's sad, and it's insulting.
The fact that you're coworkers is absolutely idiotic.
Frankly, you need to change jobs. You need to do everything you possibly can to get yourself away from him so you don't cave and go back. And you need to do it ASAP.
And you agree to let HIM keep you a secret, as if you are not worth knowing legitimately. Think about that for a second.
You are basically agreeing that you are not worth bringing out...
Yeah that's the part I feel when I try and put myself in her shoes.
He said he's not leaving his wife, so she pretty much doesn't have to try to have a regular relationship and a fulfilling life.
OP, you must be thinking you're not good enough, that you don't deserve to go out in public and make plans for a future. Does that seem scary or challenging?
You don't say you have a problem meeting men though, so if I was you and I wanted to stop this-- I would block his number so as not to deal with him outside of work. Meet other men. What helps is to meet someone who treats you well so that you can get over him and wonder what the hell you were thinking!
So i have been seeing a married man for roughly a year and 8 months now. At the beginging was just sex, we was both happy with this arrangement. But it only took about 1 week until we both started to think I can't just have sex emotionally its more than that! In this time ive slept with a few other guys which he knows about and was not happy about at all. These guys he also made me cut of from them and have no contact! One of the guys i had a reallt good connection with, but i always end up back with the married man as i find it so hard to break awwy from it! He was always honest from the beginging saying im not looking to leave my wife and I greatly respect that because in my mind I knew would be nothing more and it was fine for me. But then obviously he started to get jelous about other guys and in not sure if I'm annoyed he has a wife or im jelous of his wife or im upset that he's not with me. But obviously 1 year and 8 months down the line and there is a lot of feelings now. He has never said "I'm leaving my wife" but he says things like "maybe one day we could be together who knows" I haven't got any patience to wait for any man bevause ive always been second best and i know I am second best as he has 2 kids and a wife. The second one was concieved while we was together and all the while i asked ig he was having sex with his wife and he told me 'no only for special occasiion" like wtf does that mean! Then he told me about 6 months later the truth about it but apparntly it only happened once! I dont believe nothing at all he tells me, i feel like its all a lie! He tells me ita nothing with his wife he did to make a child! He has told me he loves me a few times, but if he loved me he would be with me? If you love someone it goes above everyone and every thing elae because its a very hard thing to deny! For me its not enough anymore, espically sometimes he can only see me for 1 hour maxium, And to point out we have never been out in public alone together, never been on a date, we just get hotels and meet where we can where nobody can see! We also work together so breaking off with him is even harder! I'm writing this and thinking to myself how can I be such an idiot?! But honestly how do you end something like this it is so difficult!
I have serious doubts this post is real. If it is, then the bold part is the kicker.
Make yourself unavailable EVERY single time he asks to get together. Tell someone in your HR department what is happening. Follow up with HR again if he threatens you. Document conversations. Just say NO.
I have serious doubts this post is real. If it is, then the bold part is the kicker.
Make yourself unavailable EVERY single time he asks to get together. Tell someone in your HR department what is happening. Follow up with HR again if he threatens you. Document conversations. Just say NO.
I have serious doubts this post is real. If it is, then the bold part is the kicker.
Make yourself unavailable EVERY single time he asks to get together. Tell someone in your HR department what is happening. Follow up with HR again if he threatens you. Document conversations. Just say NO.
This is what I thought too.
Probably a girl fantasizing about banging a married co-worker.
So i have been seeing a married man for roughly a year and 8 months now. At the beginging was just sex, we was both happy with this arrangement. But it only took about 1 week until we both started to think I can't just have sex emotionally its more than that! In this time ive slept with a few other guys which he knows about and was not happy about at all. These guys he also made me cut of from them and have no contact! One of the guys i had a reallt good connection with, but i always end up back with the married man as i find it so hard to break awwy from it! He was always honest from the beginging saying im not looking to leave my wife and I greatly respect that because in my mind I knew would be nothing more and it was fine for me. But then obviously he started to get jelous about other guys and in not sure if I'm annoyed he has a wife or im jelous of his wife or im upset that he's not with me. But obviously 1 year and 8 months down the line and there is a lot of feelings now. He has never said "I'm leaving my wife" but he says things like "maybe one day we could be together who knows" I haven't got any patience to wait for any man bevause ive always been second best and i know I am second best as he has 2 kids and a wife. The second one was concieved while we was together and all the while i asked ig he was having sex with his wife and he told me 'no only for special occasiion" like wtf does that mean! Then he told me about 6 months later the truth about it but apparntly it only happened once! I dont believe nothing at all he tells me, i feel like its all a lie! He tells me ita nothing with his wife he did to make a child! He has told me he loves me a few times, but if he loved me he would be with me? If you love someone it goes above everyone and every thing elae because its a very hard thing to deny! For me its not enough anymore, espically sometimes he can only see me for 1 hour maxium, And to point out we have never been out in public alone together, never been on a date, we just get hotels and meet where we can where nobody can see! We also work together so breaking off with him is even harder! I'm writing this and thinking to myself how can I be such an idiot?! But honestly how do you end something like this it is so difficult!
I honestly wouldn't have nice things to say to either of you. You are both scum, so keep at it. You deserve the mess and at some point- it will get worse.
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