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IMHO there is no good reason to be having sex with someone who isn't in the same place emotionally and mentally as you. If you start in the same place and one or the other ends up somewhere else mentally and emotionally - its time to stop.
Check and see if your friend has the same sort of growing feelings as you. If not say - hey, I need to go find someone with the same feelings as me to have sex with - I still care and want to be friends.
Otherwise you are going to be hurt and looking for someone new later anyway.
We wish every person were mature enough to have an open and honest conversation. But unfortunately people will say just what you want to hear in order to get what you want, this guy may not be any different. So it is NOT being manipulative to stop having sex with him for a little while, it is simply a way to make sure you don't waste your time or get hurt.
No. Even if this guy is in love with her, he's just going to run away from that move. This guy is clearly NOT in love with her, but I do think that he likes her. Women fall in love aka develop crush feelings much more quickly than men. Men are just wired differently. And both this young people are way too young to contemplate marriage or even getting super seriously involved in a love relationship. What has happened is that this is an FWB that has typically turned into a situation of the female developing deeper feelings for the guy. And even this is normal as in most relationships, one partner is at a different emotional level than the other one.
The O.P. enjoys sex with this guy, so why should she stop having sex with him just to try to manipulate him into a love relationship? That makes no sense at all. He's just going to find another girl to have an FWB with. Plus he will know that in the future, she will turn off the "sex spigot" to manipulate him again. And one of the reasons that guys are marriage phobic is the thought that they will be stuck in a marriage where the sexual activity eventually dwindles down to nothing after a few years of matrimony.
The O.P. is just starting to have deeper feelings for this guy. It can't even be called love feelings yet. All she wants is to be considered for the role of girlfriend in his life. And that's why I recommend to keep having the sex with him (which she also enjoys) but to also get out of his apartment and show him that she's great company to be with in other situations. She needs to show him that she's great girlfriend material, and having great sex on a regular basis with him is part of it. But she also has to show that she's fun, trustworthy, consistent in behaviour, not a drama queen, SANE and NOT A MANIPULATOR. His friends should be jealous that he's got such a great girl pal/girlfriend.
Witholding sex for two months is only going to make him run away from her and look for another young woman to hang out with.
Not having sex with a friend is manipulation?
I didnt realize I had to have sex with my friends, wow!
Confused808 is starting to like him because of the things that he "says" to her that would make a woman think that a man would want her for more than just sex.
Just ask him before things get too complicated, I have no idea what the guy is thinking.
Regardless of how this guys feels about her if she trys something manipulative like refusing to have sex with him, he is out the door to get away from the BS.
Whats wrong with just talking to him?
Sex shouldn't be used as a weapon.
Haha, yeah, stop the "tests" and games just communicate.
In my original post the first thing I said is " it is ideal for her to talk to him". No problem with that. Tests are for those who seek to know if he also feels the same way or not. Which the OP clearly stated she wanted to know.
In my original post the first thing I said is " it is ideal for her to talk to him". No problem with that. Tests are for those who seek to know if he also feels the same way or not. Which the OP clearly stated she wanted to know.
haha. Confusion is not a problem here. Just in your head.
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