Update on Retirement (physically, weather, moving, conversation)
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Retired from my many-years-job as a night charge RN in a big psychiatric hospital in January of this year. Move to my new little house from eastern MA end of April, have been here about five months.
I am only now becoming aware of how much stress, real stress, I lived in during my working years, both the stress of third-shift work, and the overall environment of locked psychiatric units. As I expected, I miss the camaraderie and conversation with co-workers. I don't miss the work. I never thought I was "under stress" because I am so calm when crazy things happen and I'm where the buck stops. I've always thought it was good to get paid for what you're already good at, that it didn't take much from me to take care of business.
I have also been somewhat dismissive of "stress" as an experience because I have always been so tough in life no matter what happens (and a lot happened, both in and out of work).
So I turn up here in beautiful mountain Colorado, ever glad that I moved here. Not because there's anything specific that I want to do (don't ski, smoke weed, run up and down mountains) but because I am just glad to live in such a beautiful place, with dry sunny weather (drought and heat wave...). I started one volunteer activity, had three rounds of guests from the East who did all the great tourist things here (horseback riding, jeep touring, restaurants, shops, gorgeous drives (Million-Dollar Highway, Last Dollar Road).
So I hit the wall early on. Extreme fatigue, getting worse in recent weeks. I thought I was recovering from working nights when I started to sleep well in August after months of poor sleep, and I assume I am recovering. But this fatigue is like walking underwater. No brain fog, but a heavy sodden feeling physically in or after motion.
I am reading up on adrenal insufficiency, and the effects of extreme stress. I certainly did feel, towards the end of working, that "something is broken" and I did note that other older workers, although they said they were tired, still seemed to get around and be active in their lives, and I just never was.
I am getting cleared for possible Lyme Disease and am currently in the cortisol evaluation phase of adrenal function assessment. I am sincerely hoping to get some kind of answer for this exhaustion. I had mono three times (ages 15, 37 and 49) or was it exacerbation of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome? I am feeling mono-like again with the exhaustion and glands. On and on. The only thing to do is rule out those things that can be quantified.
On the good side, I am learning how to cook and am eating extremely healthfully, and that was a goal for getting off shift work and out of stress. Slowly in the back of my mind I am coalescing the things I want to be involved in. There is a lively and active community here, and people are very community focused (along with the divisions that come with that... I pointed out to one old-timer that, while the vegan bakery and yoga studio might be new in town, the Thai restaurant has been here for years, and yes, the beautification plan and park benches were a nice addition).
I almost joined a local Elks chapter but decided it was not my speed, although I do hope to take part in activities of theirs with veterans (Coffee/bake gathering, therapy animal visits to V.A.). I have joined the Great Old Broads for Wilderness, of which the local "broadband" is two other women who advocate for public lands and so forth (national headquarters is in Durango, a three-hour drive).
I am looking into info about town growth and its issues and solutions (strongtowns.org) and want to be informed on the issues that inevitably come up in a town that is changing (although the population seems to be stay around 1,000- I think some retirees age out and move elsewhere). Some people are still willing to discuss the controversy of the traffic light (the only one in the county). Others who have been here for, say, five or ten years, are quite in arms about all the changes in the last three years (town got grants for "Creative Corridor" and "Main Street," and the mayor and former mayor are very pro-active in the town creating an identity, where it used to be a drive-through area for the ski resort 35 miles away). And so forth.
My dogs are fine. I lost one senior a couple of weeks ago to sudden seizures/probable brain tumor (RIP, Dusty) and acquired the same day a little Chi-Jack Russell girl who had become homeless (hello, Suzy). I am not walking anyone due to this fatigue but do hope to get out with my chubby 7-year-old cattle dog, Peanut. They have my back deck and yard for their own activities. This is very much a town of dogs!
Thank you for reading.
So that's my update. I don't regret for a moment my retirement or moving. Having long-prized self-awareness, however painful, I am chagrined that I didn't identify just what effect stressful shift work was having on me. I thought I just needed to sleep for a while. Which I do.
I still highly recommend retirement and doing one's homework for possible relocation. Of course, since I have no one else to consider, my efforts were pretty simple. I had vacationed here many times and the internet was a great help to see what things were or weren't available. There have been no surprises in either direction.
I'm glad you're loving your new location/life and I will echo what Clemencia said: I hope they figure out what's going on.
BTW, I've also had mono more than once and have odd symptoms from time to time (exhaustion, whole body achiness, sometimes even low grade fever) that I attribute to that pesky Epstein-Barr virus.
Hi, great to hear from you! How about doing more hobbies or more pastimes and avocations, in addition to your dogs?
Something like astronomy (buy a telescope) or rock collecting or tree identification (maybe also collect autumn leaves and press them to save) or fly fishing (or other types of fishing) or slow bicycling with a foldable european type bicycle or other sturdy bicycle (dawdling around slowly like bicycling used to be, slowly moving, looking at things), growing plants in soil inside and/or outside if possible (I know you said it's very dusty soil), maybe a little bit of cross county skiing on trails in winter (if possible), trying artistic painting, learning to play a flutophone or recorder with a guidebook ......anything you can think of and are interested in..... healthy cooking which you are doing is great!
The more hobbies, avocations, and pastimes one has, the less time one has to think about one's health and energy (if possible).
Last edited by matisse12; 09-22-2018 at 02:07 PM..
Retired from my many-years-job as a night charge RN in a big psychiatric hospital in January of this year. Move to my new little house from eastern MA end of April, have been here about five months.
I am only now becoming aware of how much stress, real stress, I lived in during my working years, both the stress of third-shift work, and the overall environment of locked psychiatric units. As I expected, I miss the camaraderie and conversation with co-workers. I don't miss the work. I never thought I was "under stress" because I am so calm when crazy things happen and I'm where the buck stops. I've always thought it was good to get paid for what you're already good at, that it didn't take much from me to take care of business.
I have also been somewhat dismissive of "stress" as an experience because I have always been so tough in life no matter what happens (and a lot happened, both in and out of work).
So I turn up here in beautiful mountain Colorado, ever glad that I moved here. Not because there's anything specific that I want to do (don't ski, smoke weed, run up and down mountains) but because I am just glad to live in such a beautiful place, with dry sunny weather (drought and heat wave...). I started one volunteer activity, had three rounds of guests from the East who did all the great tourist things here (horseback riding, jeep touring, restaurants, shops, gorgeous drives (Million-Dollar Highway, Last Dollar Road).
So I hit the wall early on. Extreme fatigue, getting worse in recent weeks. I thought I was recovering from working nights when I started to sleep well in August after months of poor sleep, and I assume I am recovering. But this fatigue is like walking underwater. No brain fog, but a heavy sodden feeling physically in or after motion.
I am reading up on adrenal insufficiency, and the effects of extreme stress. I certainly did feel, towards the end of working, that "something is broken" and I did note that other older workers, although they said they were tired, still seemed to get around and be active in their lives, and I just never was.
I am getting cleared for possible Lyme Disease and am currently in the cortisol evaluation phase of adrenal function assessment. I am sincerely hoping to get some kind of answer for this exhaustion. I had mono three times (ages 15, 37 and 49) or was it exacerbation of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome? I am feeling mono-like again with the exhaustion and glands. On and on. The only thing to do is rule out those things that can be quantified.
On the good side, I am learning how to cook and am eating extremely healthfully, and that was a goal for getting off shift work and out of stress. Slowly in the back of my mind I am coalescing the things I want to be involved in. There is a lively and active community here, and people are very community focused (along with the divisions that come with that... I pointed out to one old-timer that, while the vegan bakery and yoga studio might be new in town, the Thai restaurant has been here for years, and yes, the beautification plan and park benches were a nice addition).
I almost joined a local Elks chapter but decided it was not my speed, although I do hope to take part in activities of theirs with veterans (Coffee/bake gathering, therapy animal visits to V.A.). I have joined the Great Old Broads for Wilderness, of which the local "broadband" is two other women who advocate for public lands and so forth (national headquarters is in Durango, a three-hour drive).
I am looking into info about town growth and its issues and solutions (strongtowns.org) and want to be informed on the issues that inevitably come up in a town that is changing (although the population seems to be stay around 1,000- I think some retirees age out and move elsewhere). Some people are still willing to discuss the controversy of the traffic light (the only one in the county). Others who have been here for, say, five or ten years, are quite in arms about all the changes in the last three years (town got grants for "Creative Corridor" and "Main Street," and the mayor and former mayor are very pro-active in the town creating an identity, where it used to be a drive-through area for the ski resort 35 miles away). And so forth.
My dogs are fine. I lost one senior a couple of weeks ago to sudden seizures/probable brain tumor (RIP, Dusty) and acquired the same day a little Chi-Jack Russell girl who had become homeless (hello, Suzy). I am not walking anyone due to this fatigue but do hope to get out with my chubby 7-year-old cattle dog, Peanut. They have my back deck and yard for their own activities. This is very much a town of dogs!
Thank you for reading.
So that's my update. I don't regret for a moment my retirement or moving. Having long-prized self-awareness, however painful, I am chagrined that I didn't identify just what effect stressful shift work was having on me. I thought I just needed to sleep for a while. Which I do.
I still highly recommend retirement and doing one's homework for possible relocation. Of course, since I have no one else to consider, my efforts were pretty simple. I had vacationed here many times and the internet was a great help to see what things were or weren't available. There have been no surprises in either direction.
Just a thought, have the air quality of your house tested for mold and carbon dioxide.
Hi BDL, glad you are enjoying your new home and getting involved. Have you had your heart checked, maybe check for artery obstruction? Sending best wishes.
Just a thought, have the air quality of your house tested for mold and carbon dioxide.
Thank you. My house is brand new, the windows have always been open with the wonderful mountain air and you couldn't buy mold in this 10 percent humidity! I love the dryness.
I think you mean carbon monoxide but my house is fine on that.
I thank those who wished my energy and health. I don't have the energy for activities, otherwise I would be pushing myself past a comfort zone to be more involved. The exhaustion is rather profound. I remember a similar feeling with mono. These possible autoimmune things are very tricky and prone to trendy "alternative" solutions. But no one really knows.
Gonna go cook (my new activity!) and get ready to complete the, uh, saliva test in the test tubes for cortisol. Which one article said was utterly pointless. Grrr.
Hi BDL, glad you are enjoying your new home and getting involved. Have you had your heart checked, maybe check for artery obstruction? Sending best wishes.
Yes, thank you. All was normal last week. I do think 31+ years of third shift stressful work and lousy eating is likely to have some sort of poor effect...
Hope for a quick and full recovery so you can enjoy your town and retirement it sounds great can’t wait to join you in it on June 2020
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