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Old 03-28-2014, 11:30 AM
 
311 posts, read 450,949 times
Reputation: 298

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat View Post
How about when dad makes about twice what mom could make? I'm so glad people like you think you have it all figured out though.

It really is stunning that you think it is all so simple, that you think with that little bit of info you could make a better decision than the people actually living it. Stunning.
All else being equal, if both partners are making roughly the similar amount of money, if the dad is making slightly more than the mom and travels M-Thursday (like 60 vs 70k), makes more sense to me for the traveling partner to quit.

This small salary difference is more attuned to today's married couples than it was in the 1950s when dad was pulling in the big bucks and mom is a secretary. Nowadays both partners pull in equal weight, but more likely than not the woman is the one seen with the "disposable" job. With unemployment rates these days, no jobs should be seen as "disposable", whether a man or woman is behind that job.
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Old 03-28-2014, 12:56 PM
pll
 
1,112 posts, read 2,486,880 times
Reputation: 1130
Quote:
Originally Posted by vision33r View Post
Forget re-entering the job market, the question is why would you re-enter when you are close to completely out of it unless your family is in bad financial shape.

My wife never worked nor held a job since getting married. No plans to re-enter the job market. We intend at some point to become business owner once the situation improves.

Why go back to work and deal with the humiliation of competing with younger folks that are working long hours just for job security. It's not a way of life, unfortunately it's too common today in America.
I totally agree with you. The wife can supplement or provide "fun money" if need be, after the kids are school age. If couple's can learn to make it on one income the better they will be. The wife/mom can be focused on the children & being supportive of the spouse who has the full time position. There will be one less person in the "rat race".
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Old 03-28-2014, 08:16 PM
 
2,845 posts, read 6,014,351 times
Reputation: 3749
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
My best friend's SAH mom came back to become a VP at EDS, so I think op is ill-informed.
I think that's the exception and not the rule or norm.
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Old 03-28-2014, 08:20 PM
 
2,845 posts, read 6,014,351 times
Reputation: 3749
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
I saw what my sister went through. She graduated with 2 degrees, wanted to be the best kind of mother and had a number of kids, then when she wanted to use her degrees she found that a very long employment gap basically wiped out her degrees. Maybe if she had worked for a number of years before making the decision to stay home, it would have been better as far as getting a job in her field but she wasn't even viewed as equal to new graduates. She got a job that didn't require a degree and that didn't pay well.

It's just how it is. It was difficult for her because like she said - she had worked so hard for her degrees and to find out that they weren't going to help her much when she was ready to use them.
Yeah that might have helped a bit, but it just seems in this job market if you take off a long time that all of a sudden your skills are not longer marketable. It's total crap. It doesn't happen to everyone but it seems to happen more often than not. It also seems to depend on the industry.

Last edited by beera; 03-28-2014 at 08:31 PM..
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Old 03-28-2014, 08:36 PM
 
2,429 posts, read 4,023,230 times
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Quote:
My best friend's SAH mom came back to become a VP at EDS, so I think op is ill-informed.
Yeah, really. One person gets a great job and that makes an entire issue moot?
And, yes, many SAHM re-enter the workforce every day, and some get decent, well-paying, very good jobs. No one said they didn't.
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Old 03-29-2014, 04:08 AM
 
4,586 posts, read 5,612,940 times
Reputation: 4369
Quote:
Originally Posted by beera View Post
I think that's the exception and not the rule or norm.
For sure the exception...
Moms 'opting in' to work find doors shut - CNN.com

This is what we deal with:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...040102952.html
This woman should have never had an issue returning to work.

http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stor...shes-quitting/

MAYBE, Just MAYBE some of these "companies" can allow us to re-train for something at home on our own and TAKE THAT into account! All this whining: "but it costs so much to train, blah, blah, blah" is a JOKE, and and INSULT. Get a discount! That is BS because a LOT of training is available ONLINE for free in most cases, or very little, this is just a whining loophole for them and nothing more.

Why do Canadians get one or to years off?
They seem yo be quite an advanced civilized country! WHY do THEY respect moms???


Which would companies rather have? someone who stayed home and raised a kid? or someone with a criminal record? or someone who really doesn't want to be there? or are they THAT comfortable paying their tax dollars for our welfare? (when welfare should be for the elders and disabled ONLY)?????


Which would you rather have in an office? why should we drive through insane traffic most of the time for a job that doesn't give a $hit about us anyway????? You tell me!
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Old 03-29-2014, 08:41 AM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,176,449 times
Reputation: 32726
Quote:
Originally Posted by syracusa View Post
How do you know that?
If they are then they should have said so. A post of "I am a hiring manager and I do/do not hire former SAHM's because..." would make a far better point than people making blanket statements about why moms should never stay home, and why they will never be able to go back with their menial mom skills. Your posts in particular on this, as well as many other threads on this subject don't particularly focus on hire-ability of someone who has stayed home for a few years. Your post #25 explains a lot. You are jealous of moms who were able to stay home. That's why you have to criticize them on this forum every chance you get. It makes sense now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wallawallahoohoo View Post
All else being equal, if both partners are making roughly the similar amount of money, if the dad is making slightly more than the mom and travels M-Thursday (like 60 vs 70k), makes more sense to me for the traveling partner to quit.

This small salary difference is more attuned to today's married couples than it was in the 1950s when dad was pulling in the big bucks and mom is a secretary. Nowadays both partners pull in equal weight, but more likely than not the woman is the one seen with the "disposable" job. With unemployment rates these days, no jobs should be seen as "disposable", whether a man or woman is behind that job.
if, if, if... that is not going to be the case in all or even most families. There are too many variables for you to make a blanket statement like you did.
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Old 03-29-2014, 08:52 AM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,176,449 times
Reputation: 32726
Quote:
Originally Posted by rdflk View Post
Yeah, really. One person gets a great job and that makes an entire issue moot?
And, yes, many SAHM re-enter the workforce every day, and some get decent, well-paying, very good jobs. No one said they didn't.
So what is your issue then? Why do you think it is so far fetched that they might be able to keep up their skills and go back to work?
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Old 03-29-2014, 09:30 AM
 
Location: Texas
44,259 posts, read 64,375,553 times
Reputation: 73937
Quote:
Originally Posted by beera View Post
I think that's the exception and not the rule or norm.
Maybe in your circles, but I have countless examples.
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Old 03-29-2014, 09:59 AM
 
17,815 posts, read 25,642,029 times
Reputation: 36278
Quote:
Originally Posted by rdflk View Post
Am I being TOO judgmental?

Any one else chuckle or shake their head at some comments by stay at home moms about keeping their skills up by doing the household finances or volunteering for community groups -- or even serving on a company board.

I'll see, hear or read comments about how they've keep their skill current by doing those things (VERY part-time), so they can re-enter the job market -- after being OUT of the market for 5 or ten years.

My first thought is that just by saying you think THAT keeps your 'skills' 'up to date' shows how out of it they are.

MAYBE if a person had a real work-place part-time job I could accept the comments a little better. But I want to say, honey, (no offense intended) doing the family budget or volunteering for the PTA....while better than NOTHING I guess, doesn't mean your job skills are up to date.

Being out of the job market, I wonder if they really know how hard it can be to find a job -- when you HAVE one, let alone you've been out of the market.

And 2) maybe the kind of entry level job a housewife of ten years would get...you wouldn't need a whole lot of skills for anyway. But even then they'd be up against 100 other people for that job.

Here is a quote from one of our classiest first ladies.



"If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do matters very much"...Jackie Kennedy.

You also don't seem to get that doing volunteer work can lead to a paid position.

For example I know someone who upon deciding to return to the workforce after her children were older got a job with the school district, her years of volunteering with the PTA(that you so eloquently put down) showed she was reliable, could manage projects, could deal with kids, etc.

So while they may not become the CEO of a Fortune 500 company to say they can't get jobs or use volunteer experience to find employment is both insulting and narrow minded.
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