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I have compassion and that's why I believe (like the OP) that making excuses is counterproductive to building a successful future.
Agreed. All this codling and so-called compassion is just perpetuating peoples' failure. Everyone is afraid to give constructive criticism these days. They would rather see someone ruin their life than hurt their feelings.
i hear you you are preaching to the choir. the problem is for those seeking to be justified, you and i are the last person in the world they want to talk to. we remind them of their pile of dirty laundry back in their room. much easier to move into a new place with fresh laundry than clean up our own.
Sorry for your bad childhood, it does sound rough.
But for you to say " I had no one to give me any helping hands" when you were given several scholarships which allowed you to attend college, and to not acknowledge that or give credit to those who provided those scholarships makes you come off bad.
It wasn't you ALONE who got you where you are today.
Since you're 27 don't know if you know who Carol Burnett is. But let's go with that you know who she is.
She is someone who had two raging alcoholics as parents and grew up in poverty during the Great Depression to become one of the most beloved entertainers in history.
While she was on scholarship at UCLA when she was given the opportunity due to a generous donor to go to New York to pursue her career. The deal was she must never disclose who he was, and if she were to be successful she was to pay it forward. She kept both promises.
She still talks about this to this day, she realizes she didn't get where she was on her own to become a big star.
Sorry for your bad childhood, it does sound rough.
But for you to say " I had no one to give me any helping hands" when you were given several scholarships which allowed you to attend college, and to not acknowledge that or give credit to those who provided those scholarships makes you come off bad.
It wasn't you ALONE who got you where you are today.
Since you're 27 don't know if you know who Carol Burnett is. But let's go with that you know who she is.
She is someone who had two raging alcoholics as parents and grew up in poverty during the Great Depression to become one of the most beloved entertainers in history.
While she was on scholarship at UCLA when she was given the opportunity due to a generous donor to go to New York to pursue her career. The deal was she must never disclose who he was, and if she were to be successful she was to pay it forward. She kept both promises.
She still talks about this to this day, she realizes she didn't get where she was on her own to become a big star.
It's called humility, you could use some.
i am all for gratitude and humility and giving credit and more to those that helped us get here. what i dont like is those on the bottom of the food chain telling me i am white and lucky. the eddie murphy explanation of income inequality.
Agreed. All this codling and so-called compassion is just perpetuating peoples' failure. Everyone is afraid to give constructive criticism these days. They would rather see someone ruin their life than hurt their feelings.
Not my point at all.
The OP's arrogance and misplaced anger tarnish his story. In my experience, people who have actually been through what he claims are not so judgmental but more interested in helping/mentoring people who are in similar situations.
Your lack of compassion is surprising, however, since usually people who have "been there" understand the pitfalls and can relate to those excuses.
Excuses-making often perpetuates failure. So called "forgiveness" in such cases is the least compassionate path, and usually it is done simply as the easy path for the listener to take.
PS: I do fully agree with "paying it forward", and given the OP's background, I would bet if he chose to volunteer (spare time) with orgs helping people turn their lives around, his past history and present situation would be inspirational for them.
Excuses-making often perpetuates failure. So called "forgiveness" in such cases is the least compassionate path, and usually it is done simply as the easy path for the listener to take.
Eh?
My whole point is that the people who rant the loudest and judge the quickest about something like this usually have the LEAST amount of life experience, have dealt with the least amount of loss and have the biggest chips on their shoulders.
The ones who actually have survived traumatic experiences USUALLY are quiet in the face of such bluster because they know what it really takes to overcome. And they're often willing to help others overcome as well.
And there's a BIG difference between being compassionate and bending over.
Eh what? Did it ever occur to you that compassion is sometimes not sincere, but simply a means to end discussing topics folks find uncomfortable? If one feigns compassion, the discussion often ends faster, but that was the inverse of compassion.
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The hypocrisy is strong with this one.
