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Sometimes, my manager just makes me want to quit on the spot.....
Yesterday, she was upset with me because I didn't bring my work phone (we all have iPhones) on my vacation with me. She tried calling me during one of my vacation days and I didn't have the phone with me to answer. She was pissed. I told her I didn't want to carry two phones while on vacation. She now urged me to bring my work phone with me on all future vacations. She even said that I should be checking the damn phone every 30 to 60 minutes while on vacation. Are you KIDDING me?! What kind of vacation is THAT?! I could see maybe once or twice a day...fine. But, I ain't doing that while I'm on vacation. My position isn't even that important (trust me).
Another time, I was talking to her about how I have been having a lot of doctor's appointments over the past year. I can tell she's upset with that, too. But Jesus....I am not going to ignore personal health concerns. At one point, I said to her, "well, at least it's all free healthcare haha," (my company pays for 100% of everything) and she replied in a serious tone, "ummmm....no, Nick....the company pays for it." I replied, "haha, well yeah, I meant out of pocket." She made a weird smirk of disapproval, as if I'm abusing the system or something. Are you KIDDING me?! It's a freekin' employee BENEFIT for crying out loud. No one ever told me, "oh, here's your healthcare benefit, but you can ONLY see a doctor four times a year!" Give me a break.
Sounds like you have a manager that has no clue to what the hell she is doing, and is just rambling and whining just to do so and can't figure out how to keep the place running efficiently while you are gone. . I hate to sound sexist but I have found most female bosses this way.
Ive had 3 female bosses and not ONE of them was worth a fart and they really had no business being in the positions they were in. How they kept their positions that long (One was in that position 12 or 13 years) I have NO CLUE. If I had to guess, I would say it was due to certain "relations" with far upper management. They really had no business in those roles. Much less, stay there as long as they did. They made everyone's lives miserable and in all 3 instances, they made morale at an all time low and everything was disorganized with good people taking off
I can understand you not wanting to take the work phone with you on vacation. I don't either, because even if it wasn't totally unwise to bring a phone, much less an iPhone (ultimate thief bait unwittingly cast by wealthy westerners), much much less a work phone with sensitive info.... in most countries I go to, it'd be way too impractical and expensive to have it working in another country.
In that case, tell her exactly that.
But in the other example....
What exactly did you expect her to say? The company *is* paying for your health insurance, and you're gloating to her face about taking advantage of that. Not that you shouldn't be proactive about your health, but that's how any reasonable person would've explained it -- not 'HAHA, they're the suckas paying for it, and I'm milking it cause I can!'
Most managers these days are either planners or delegaters. Very few are actually skilled at a trade well most have removed themselves from a skilled trade so their profession is to make your job harder to maintain a level of control.
Most managers today have very little patience or give to their staff because there are lots of bad workers that like to push things back.
I was a manager of 4 IT workers and I am usually very pleasant but this one worker really drove me to the brink because he would always push things back and take advantage of me when I go soft on him. My boss the director, put a lot of pressure on me to deliver projects and expects that I don't meddle with the actual work and expect I apply the workload on my staff whichever way possible to get things done.
He told me that once you set a tone to your worker, things will get done rather much quicker when you mean business.
I don't usually tell my workers my personal life, I would ask them about theirs so I can understand their life better so I can try to accommodate their life issues.
Anyway, I'll probably be in the minority (i'm fine with it, too) but I think you're whining a lot for a situation you aren't even actively trying to get out of.
If it's that bad, leave. The vacation thing I don't agree with, but I would have flat out told her I am not doing that as my vacation days are to be used for.. vacation!
And then free healthcare? God. I wish I could get free healthcare. And you're whining about it.
I dunno. I find nothing amusing about this, as you clearly do OP since you're about laughing about healthcare you do not even pay a dime for.
Sounds like you have a manager that has no clue to what the hell she is doing, and is just rambling and whining just to do so and can't figure out how to keep the place running efficiently while you are gone. . I hate to sound sexist but I have found most female bosses this way.
Ive had 3 female bosses and not ONE of them was worth a fart and they really had no business being in the positions they were in. How they kept their positions that long (One was in that position 12 or 13 years) I have NO CLUE. If I had to guess, I would say it was due to certain "relations" with far upper management. They really had no business in those roles. Much less, stay there as long as they did. They made everyone's lives miserable and in all 3 instances, they made morale at an all time low and everything was disorganized with good people taking off
Ummmmmmmm.........
Yeah...........
This is pretty sexist right here.
I've been in I.T. since I was 22 years old. Hence, I have not had many female managers/bosses. However, I would rank them above most of my male managers. It has not been my experience that women are any more or less competent managers than men.
Managing people is difficult. Most people don't do it very well. My current manager (male) is a nice enough guy, but he really sucks at managing people and processes. You can tell he doesn't even like it. His "style" creates major problems for my team.
Getting back to the OP's issue...if I'm taking a day off, it's a day off. I do not have a work-issued phone and I refuse to configure my personal phone to receive work e-mails. If they want me to check work e-mails on a mobile device, they have to provide the device. I push back strongly on BYOD policies. It's my phone. I paid for it. Not them. My company doesn't even subsidize employee mobile devices IF we choose to receive work e-mails on them. So, there is absolutely no incentive for me to do so.
At other companies where I was issued a Blackberry, I usually never monitored it unless I was actually on-call. I always had work-issued laptops so I monitored work e-mails on that if I was at home, or not at all if I was out and about.
I have consistently refused to bring work-issued devices with me on vacation. It's a vacation. If I'm working, that means I'm at work. If I'm taking an earned PTO day, that means you don't get to contact me. I won't return your calls or e-mails. Period. So far, only one company has tried to come down on me for that. I got another job elsewhere. I was already working 60-80 hours a week, and they told me I should be "grateful" to "have a weekend [where the phone didn't ring]." Uh...no. BS.
If we don't start pushing back against the "constantly connected" culture and set firm expectations with our managers, i.e. vacation means VACATION, then it's just going to get worse and worse.
The OP's manager is an a-hole who doesn't know what the hell she's doing. That has nothing to do with her being female and everything to do with her being a crappy manager.
I don't think the OP did anything wrong. I'd have done the same thing. On vacation? Work phone stays in a drawer at the house.
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