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An employer would be right to worry about your emotional stability. You seem highly strung and dramatic. Maybe you should consider another field with less stress?
An employer would be right to worry about your emotional stability. You seem highly strung and dramatic. Maybe you should consider another field with less stress?
This a genuinely nasty and unnecessary thing to say to me.
I've been successful in all of the jobs I've worked in, including criminal law internships in law school dealing with crimes so grisly they don't even make the news. It's not that I'm "high strung" and "dramatic", it's that the stakes I'm dealing with here are pretty damn high.
And what you see as "high strung" is me making sure every detail is as well-thought over as possible. That's why I won every hearing and case I argued practicing law, graduated from one of the most intensive language schools in the US, helped make products top sellers for Fortune 100 corporations, and more, without a family, without help from anyone, all on my own.
I was at my last job for 4 years and was given increasing responsibilities, I'm clearly capable of holding down jobs and doing well in them. Did you even read the thread, zentropa, or did you just come in here to attack my character?
Last edited by lookingforadvice20202; 12-31-2016 at 01:44 PM..
"It was a combination of personal and professional reasons. Professionally, I had an opportunity to take a freelance assignment that absolutely intrigued me. Personally, there was a female colleague with whom I regretted being a bit involved with and I wanted to put distance between us. So when this great freelance project came my way, I jumped at the chance."
Be prepared to respond to the next questions: what was so great about the project (put an exciting twist on the very first project you took about an exposure to a situation or skills acquired) and what happened with the lady (mention she was more interested in a relationship than you were and that you will not involve yourself with women at work beyond professional ever again)
I suggest the above because if your new employer ever gets even a slight wind of the issue at your former place of employment, it will be already set up that you have your spin on this stated. Also, it is true (tho the harassment stigma removed) and its so much easier to be truthful.
As a former HR exec., I can tell you I have heard many such confessions and actually respected people who told me these things over "bad commute" or "sick aunt" because some show ownership and lessons learned.
Yeah, I think I'll try the freelancing one first. My resume and education already demonstrate credibility, and this is the first gap I've had in employment/education since I could start working, so it's not really a pattern I have to explain away.
How about this, too: explain that there was upheaval/chaos at my job. Which there was. In the year that I quit about 1/3 of my department also quit/found new jobs. Wasn't a great place to work for anyone.
I was also running on a hamster wheel because I was getting more responsibilities without promotion (and where I work is notorious for never giving promotions). So in light of the chaos, upheaval, and hamster wheel thing, I quit after 4 years, and I decided to try freelancing, and it worked out for a while, but I now realize I prefer full-time employment working with other people on a day to day basis. One of my co-workers quit to start their own business, so I've seen it.
Too much detail? Not enough? Just right?
No. Don't talk about the environment in a negative way. If you are leaving to do freelance work, then this is the reason. It has zero to do with if the work environment was terrible or not. When you talk to these idiots in HR, and tell them anything was bad, they take this that YOU were the problem. Besides, this is about professionalism, and it simply isn't professional to talk badly about things, especially when there is zero reason to do so.
So the interview should go something like this...
HR: Why did you leave your last job?
You: I wanted to gain further experience just focusing on X, and after getting inquiries for free-lancing work I decided to make the change. With free-lance work you get a chance to be responsible for a larger part of the project even though it is a smaller project overall. So I took it with the intention of doing this for a while to gain the experience, and then decided to look for a job that would allow me to use this new skill.
That sort of thing. Prepare how you are going to answer every question, and practice your answers. Record them on your cell phone and listen to them. Work to improve them so they come across as thoughtful and polished. Don't make any sighs of frustration or you are having trouble answering the questions.
I quit 8 months ago, so that's what needs to be explained. A-D would work if I were still employed, what I need is the best explanation for that gap that doesn't actually tell the weird truth I'm sure nobody wants to hear.
8 months or 8 years, it doesn't matter. You left to do free-lancing and this is what you've been doing.
An employer would be right to worry about your emotional stability. You seem highly strung and dramatic. Maybe you should consider another field with less stress?
Please list the types of occupations the OP should pursue where there is no risk of negative experiences such as these?
"It was a combination of personal and professional reasons. Professionally, I had an opportunity to take a freelance assignment that absolutely intrigued me. Personally, there was a female colleague with whom I regretted being a bit involved with and I wanted to put distance between us. So when this great freelance project came my way, I jumped at the chance."
Be prepared to respond to the next questions: what was so great about the project (put an exciting twist on the very first project you took about an exposure to a situation or skills acquired) and what happened with the lady (mention she was more interested in a relationship than you were and that you will not involve yourself with women at work beyond professional ever again)
I suggest the above because if your new employer ever gets even a slight wind of the issue at your former place of employment, it will be already set up that you have your spin on this stated. Also, it is true (tho the harassment stigma removed) and its so much easier to be truthful.
As a former HR exec., I can tell you I have heard many such confessions and actually respected people who told me these things over "bad commute" or "sick aunt" because some show ownership and lessons learned.
I know you are trying to be helpful, but this is what's wrong with HR people. It is none of your business! You aren't entitled to discuss hurtful topics such as this with applicants. It is pointless and comes across as being nosy. It is also hurtful to make someone relive this again by telling you, and for what purpose? Why in the world do you need to know that the OP was troubled like this through no fault of their own? What professional reasons could there be? Just stupid to discuss it. The OP was doing free-lancing and that's it, and the reasons for doing free-lancing is all that needs to be discussed. Many people leave companies to do free-lancing, contract or start their own small company it doesn't doing so warrants to make a confession to someone in HR. You aren't the OP's Priest or psychologist, so don't pretend to be or that you have a valid reason for being privileged to discuss it.
Besides your way of explaining the "relationship" makes it sound like the OP might be delusional and was actually the one causing the problems and this is why the OP left. No, no, no and no. It was to pursue free-lancing.
Besides your way of explaining the "relationship" makes it sound like the OP might be delusional and was actually the one causing the problems and this is why the OP left. No, no, no and no. It was to pursue free-lancing.
I'm going to start with this one first, I think I've got a good spiel to go through. I'm good at verbal stuff, so I can probably pull it off. I also wish I was delusional, I don't think I would've quit over delusions and then spent the past 8 months working on how not to be victimized again, and then reappear to get my feet back on the ground after figuring it out.
OP, I think you're overthinking the issue, in my opinion. Pick a reason and go with it. The bigger a deal you make of this, the bigger deal it will be. If you make yourself attractive in the market place, it won't matter one bit what your reason for leaving your previous employer was. Focus on what you can control, your marketability, and less of what happened in the past that you can't control. Best of luck to you.
Thanks. Talking things out here has helped me, and I appreciate all the advice everyone here has given.
I've settled on my story: took a career "Rumspringa" to try out freelancing, discovered I prefer working on teams in a full-time environment. I think it's much better than my original explanation.
This is just one element I've been focusing on, I know my marketability/skills are the most important thing, I just want to make sure I've got every element of this down well, and this was by far the hardest part for me. Everything else is easy compared to this, so I think the time spent on it was worth it.
Last edited by lookingforadvice20202; 01-01-2017 at 03:43 AM..
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