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Whoever thinks that is the one with the problem, not the person keeping it private.
Guilty? Something to hide? Please.
And part of a good relationship with colleagues is respecting boundaries. A reaction that they must be guilty of something or hiding something is what isn't conducive to that.
At. All.
Your co-workers will find out where you are working next anyway. No matter what. There is a lot to gain by telling them yourself. There is nothing to gain by keeping it private.
You don't get to know and talk with co-workers on a personal level? Maintaining a level of a personal relationship with colleagues is by far one of the best things to do in your career.
<shrug> I seem to be doing fair-to-middlin'.
My field is pretty small and the number of people who do what I do tend to know someone who knows someone who'd know me. Gossipy busybodies are everywhere, and if I'm starting in a new environment, I much prefer that my new colleagues get their first impression by interacting with me, not through the rumor mill. That's way more important than having some past colleague being miffed that I didn't cater to their curiosity.
You know what is a really good thing to do for your career? Realize that people who make decisions won't be liked by everyone. Mixing personal with professional comes with a risk.
My field is pretty small and the number of people who do what I do tend to know someone who knows someone who'd know me. Gossipy busybodies are everywhere, and if I'm starting in a new environment, I much prefer that my new colleagues get their first impression by interacting with me, not through the rumor mill. That's way more important than having some past colleague being miffed that I didn't cater to their curiosity.
You know what is a really good thing to do for your career? Realize that people who make decisions won't be liked by everyone. Mixing personal with professional comes with a risk.
What does that have to do with what I said? I am talking about maintaining a relationship with your old company. They aren't going to care enough to try and sabotage your new job. You have absolutely nothing to gain by keeping something like this to yourself.
Not putting effort into managing relationships is not good for your career. Could you call an old boss today, have lunch with them, and have them find you a job with an old company? Having relationships with old companies to the point you can do that is good for your career. There's nothing wrong with what you're describing, but it's average. Average isn't what's best for your career, IMO.
Cool. I can do that without feeding people's idle curiosity.
Then you can also do with giving up relationships that would move your career forward. Again, nothing wrong with that, but you gain nothing, as far as your career is concerned.
Your co-workers will find out where you are working next anyway. No matter what. There is a lot to gain by telling them yourself. There is nothing to gain by keeping it private.
You’ve clearly never worked for a company with vindictive owners, management or coworkers.
Experience has taught me never to reveal where I’m going until after I’m settled in my new job. I’ve known vindictive coworkers who’ve tried to sabotage the new job of a departing coworker. I’ve worked at a company where this was practiced regularly by the owners.
“Nasty Company” had terrible business practices (some of which were illegal) and treated their employees like indentured servants. Former employees regularly needed counseling or went on extended medical leave for stress after working for them. I know this because the owners would openly discuss it in the office within earshot of everone. They kept a team of aggressive attorneys on retainer for all the various lawsuits they had going at any given time, who were masters of spinning things in the company’s favor. The owners were powerful with deep pockets in a small industry and could afford the legal bills. They could also take business away from companies that crossed them.
The nasty owners would routinely call up the new employers of departing employees to sabotage their new positions and ruin their reputations. In several cases, they ruined things so badly with outright lies that the offers were rescinded and Nasty Company also fired them for having the nerve to find another job, so the poor employee was doubly out of a job. Of course we all know this is illegal, but first you need to have the money to hire an attorney to fight it, then the attorney needs to be able to prove it, and then he needs to be talented and tough enough to fight Nasty Company’s aggressive attorneys. Not all attorneys are created equal. Not to mention, other companies wouldn’t say anything against Nasty Company because Nasty Company was powerful in their small industry and had the ability to materially affect their business. None of this is easy when you’re out of a job, low on funds, and you have almost no chance of getting another job in your industry thanks to the lies of Nasty Company.
When I gave Nasty 2 weeks notice, I was a low level secretary and they didn’t care where I went. They gave me enough time to collect my purse, coffee mug, and a personal photo off of my desk. The company financial officer escorted me out of the building less than 15 minutes later to the sound of the owners yelling at me not to let the door hit me in the nether regions on my way out. All because I had the nerve to find another job so I could get out of that hell hole.
I believe in the philosophy of keeping my cards close to my chest in both how much I divulge about my personal life at work and in not revealing to a soon to be former employer or coworkers where I was going until AFTER I’ve left the company.
Thus, if asked, I would just smile and say, “I prefer not to say right now.” Then keep repeating as needed.
You’ve clearly never worked for a company with vindictive owners, management or coworkers.
Experience has taught me never to reveal where I’m going until after I’m settled in my new job. I’ve known vindictive coworkers who’ve tried to sabotage the new job of a departing coworker. I’ve worked at a company where this was practiced regularly by the owners.
“Nasty Company” had terrible business practices (some of which were illegal) and treated their employees like indentured servants. Former employees regularly needed counseling or went on extended medical leave for stress after working for them. I know this because the owners would openly discuss it in the office within earshot of everone. They kept a team of aggressive attorneys on retainer for all the various lawsuits they had going at any given time, who were masters of spinning things in the company’s favor. The owners were powerful with deep pockets in a small industry and could afford the legal bills. They could also take business away from companies that crossed them.
The nasty owners would routinely call up the new employers of departing employees to sabotage their new positions and ruin their reputations. In several cases, they ruined things so badly with outright lies that the offers were rescinded and Nasty Company also fired them for having the nerve to find another job, so the poor employee was doubly out of a job. Of course we all know this is illegal, but first you need to have the money to hire an attorney to fight it, then the attorney needs to be able to prove it, and then he needs to be talented and tough enough to fight Nasty Company’s aggressive attorneys. Not all attorneys are created equal. Not to mention, other companies wouldn’t say anything against Nasty Company because Nasty Company was powerful in their small industry and had the ability to materially affect their business. None of this is easy when you’re out of a job, low on funds, and you have almost no chance of getting another job in your industry thanks to the lies of Nasty Company.
When I gave Nasty 2 weeks notice, I was a low level secretary and they didn’t care where I went. They gave me enough time to collect my purse, coffee mug, and a personal photo off of my desk. The company financial officer escorted me out of the building less than 15 minutes later to the sound of the owners yelling at me not to let the door hit me in the nether regions on my way out. All because I had the nerve to find another job so I could get out of that hell hole.
I believe in the philosophy of keeping my cards close to my chest in both how much I divulge about my personal life at work and in not revealing to a soon to be former employer or coworkers where I was going until AFTER I’ve left the company.
Thus, if asked, I would just smile and say, “I prefer not to say right now.” Then keep repeating as needed.
That opens them up to a very clear defamation lawsuit. Most bosses are smart enough to know not to do that.
I have been talking under the assumption people work to maintain a decent relationship with bosses and co-workers while on the job, too. If you get to the point where someone would go out of their way to sabotage your career, something went wrong.
You’ve clearly never worked for a company with vindictive owners, management or coworkers.
Experience has taught me never to reveal where I’m going until after I’m settled in my new job. I’ve known vindictive coworkers who’ve tried to sabotage the new job of a departing coworker. I’ve worked at a company where this was practiced regularly by the owners.
“Nasty Company” had terrible business practices (some of which were illegal) and treated their employees like indentured servants. Former employees regularly needed counseling or went on extended medical leave for stress after working for them. I know this because the owners would openly discuss it in the office within earshot of everone. They kept a team of aggressive attorneys on retainer for all the various lawsuits they had going at any given time, who were masters of spinning things in the company’s favor. The owners were powerful with deep pockets in a small industry and could afford the legal bills. They could also take business away from companies that crossed them.
The nasty owners would routinely call up the new employers of departing employees to sabotage their new positions and ruin their reputations. In several cases, they ruined things so badly with outright lies that the offers were rescinded and Nasty Company also fired them for having the nerve to find another job, so the poor employee was doubly out of a job. Of course we all know this is illegal, but first you need to have the money to hire an attorney to fight it, then the attorney needs to be able to prove it, and then he needs to be talented and tough enough to fight Nasty Company’s aggressive attorneys. Not all attorneys are created equal. Not to mention, other companies wouldn’t say anything against Nasty Company because Nasty Company was powerful in their small industry and had the ability to materially affect their business. None of this is easy when you’re out of a job, low on funds, and you have almost no chance of getting another job in your industry thanks to the lies of Nasty Company.
When I gave Nasty 2 weeks notice, I was a low level secretary and they didn’t care where I went. They gave me enough time to collect my purse, coffee mug, and a personal photo off of my desk. The company financial officer escorted me out of the building less than 15 minutes later to the sound of the owners yelling at me not to let the door hit me in the nether regions on my way out. All because I had the nerve to find another job so I could get out of that hell hole.
I believe in the philosophy of keeping my cards close to my chest in both how much I divulge about my personal life at work and in not revealing to a soon to be former employer or coworkers where I was going until AFTER I’ve left the company.
Thus, if asked, I would just smile and say, “I prefer not to say right now.” Then keep repeating as needed.
Privately owned companies, unfortunately, are often owned by dysfunctional people. You played your cards well, given the circumstances.
You’ve clearly never worked for a company with vindictive owners, management or coworkers.
Experience has taught me never to reveal where I’m going until after I’m settled in my new job. I’ve known vindictive coworkers who’ve tried to sabotage the new job of a departing coworker. I’ve worked at a company where this was practiced regularly by the owners.
“Nasty Company” had terrible business practices (some of which were illegal) and treated their employees like indentured servants. Former employees regularly needed counseling or went on extended medical leave for stress after working for them. I know this because the owners would openly discuss it in the office within earshot of everone. They kept a team of aggressive attorneys on retainer for all the various lawsuits they had going at any given time, who were masters of spinning things in the company’s favor. The owners were powerful with deep pockets in a small industry and could afford the legal bills. They could also take business away from companies that crossed them.
The nasty owners would routinely call up the new employers of departing employees to sabotage their new positions and ruin their reputations. In several cases, they ruined things so badly with outright lies that the offers were rescinded and Nasty Company also fired them for having the nerve to find another job, so the poor employee was doubly out of a job. Of course we all know this is illegal, but first you need to have the money to hire an attorney to fight it, then the attorney needs to be able to prove it, and then he needs to be talented and tough enough to fight Nasty Company’s aggressive attorneys. Not all attorneys are created equal. Not to mention, other companies wouldn’t say anything against Nasty Company because Nasty Company was powerful in their small industry and had the ability to materially affect their business. None of this is easy when you’re out of a job, low on funds, and you have almost no chance of getting another job in your industry thanks to the lies of Nasty Company.
When I gave Nasty 2 weeks notice, I was a low level secretary and they didn’t care where I went. They gave me enough time to collect my purse, coffee mug, and a personal photo off of my desk. The company financial officer escorted me out of the building less than 15 minutes later to the sound of the owners yelling at me not to let the door hit me in the nether regions on my way out. All because I had the nerve to find another job so I could get out of that hell hole.
I believe in the philosophy of keeping my cards close to my chest in both how much I divulge about my personal life at work and in not revealing to a soon to be former employer or coworkers where I was going until AFTER I’ve left the company.
Thus, if asked, I would just smile and say, “I prefer not to say right now.” Then keep repeating as needed.
We must have worked for the same company. I would listen to the owner do the exact thing you're talking about - discovering where former employees went and calling those companies.
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