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My department likes to go out to Happy Hour every couple/few months , but I don't drink and prefer not to interact with my coworker in that envirnoment . I like my coworkers as coworkers , and prefer to get to know them in small talk . I'm a type of person to keep work and home life separate and try to limit my talk with coworkers about personal things and just talk about general things.
So my questions is : Does anyone else try to avoid outings with your department ? if so what type of reason do you give if you do it on a regular basis ? Right now I'm still new (under 6mths), so its not obvious but this is the first job that it seems like the whole department goes out and want to!
Also for those who don't drink how do you handle happy hour with coworkers? Because honestly I don't want to go into detail with them why I don't.
I'm similar to you in that I avoid using my personal time for work-related time. I skip on things that I simply just don't enjoy, if they did things I enjoyed maybe I would join. As far as the happy hour goes, I don't drink. I've been asked several times to go out after work with people I get along with very well, and we share some time going to lunch together, but I simply remind them that I don't drink, it's no big deal.
My department likes to go out to Happy Hour every couple/few months , but I don't drink and prefer not to interact with my coworker in that envirnoment . I like my coworkers as coworkers , and prefer to get to know them in small talk . I'm a type of person to keep work and home life separate and try to limit my talk with coworkers about personal things and just talk about general things.
So my questions is : Does anyone else try to avoid outings with your department ? if so what type of reason do you give if you do it on a regular basis ? Right now I'm still new (under 6mths), so its not obvious but this is the first job that it seems like the whole department goes out and want to!
Also for those who don't think how do you handle happy hour with coworkers? Because honestly I don't want to go into detail with them why I don't.
You're smart. The worst environment to be in is with coworkers where alcohol is involved. People start talking too much and tell you their business, even if you say nothing. These are the same people you have to see the following week.
And sometimes they regret being so chatty with you, and now you're viewed as an enemy at work even though you did nothing but stand there and listen. They told you how miserable their marriage is on Friday, and regret doing that on Monday.
You can say you have a dog that has to be let out, you can say you're taking a night class, already have dinner plans, etc.
I'm similar to you in that I avoid using my personal time for work-related time. I skip on things that I simply just don't enjoy, if they did things I enjoyed maybe I would join. As far as the happy hour goes, I don't drink. I've been asked several times to go out after work with people I get along with very well, and we share some time going to lunch together, but I simply remind them that I don't drink, it's no big deal.
This is how I hope it is for me , after being there longer -that its not a big deal.
You're smart. The worst environment to be in is with coworkers where alcohol is involved. People start talking too much and tell you their business, even if you say nothing. These are the same people you have to see the following week.
And sometimes they regret being so chatty with you, and now you're viewed as an enemy at work even though you did nothing but stand there and listen. They told you how miserable their marriage is on Friday, and regret doing that on Monday.
You can say you have a dog that has to be let out, you can say you're taking a night class, already have dinner plans, etc.
It really is best to avoid doing this.
Yes !!! This is my reasoning behind not wanting go ,excluding I don't think. And theres some coworkers I do like but they're just are so nosey and feel like they've told you something personal and want to know all about your personal life next.
But honestly I do enjoy my coworkers but just at work, with small talk
If it's only once every couple months, why not just go, have one drink, and then leave? The reality in some work environments is that if you continually refuse to take part in any social outings, it makes you look like an unfriendly and anti-social person.
My department likes to go out to Happy Hour every couple/few months , but I don't drink and prefer not to interact with my coworker in that envirnoment . I like my coworkers as coworkers , and prefer to get to know them in small talk . I'm a type of person to keep work and home life separate and try to limit my talk with coworkers about personal things and just talk about general things.
So my questions is : Does anyone else try to avoid outings with your department ? if so what type of reason do you give if you do it on a regular basis ? Right now I'm still new (under 6mths), so its not obvious but this is the first job that it seems like the whole department goes out and want to!
Also for those who don't drink how do you handle happy hour with coworkers? Because honestly I don't want to go into detail with them why I don't.
Ditto. I am exactly like you. I don't get personal with coworkers as they are obligated to be good to you at workplace so you never know deep down what they really think about you. True friends & well wishers will be more open & connected with you so its a waste of time spending more than working hours with them. That said, you cant help it if you do like someone & become close friends with them over the years. It just happens.
For team outings, those usually happen when we are out of town for a project so all of us go out for lunch/dinner. I do participate & keep the conversation limited to project or impersonal issues like the weather, that town, customers, movies, news, etc. My colleagues do the same & often talk about sports. Occasionally we have workplace outings like a happy hour or watching a game but I don't participate & say that I have some work at home which I do like cooking for family everyday, going to gym, cleaning home. I don't elaborate but I am not forcing myself to participate if I don't want to. if I want to bond with my team I have all day to talk to with them. We often have group chat during our small coffee breaks & that's enough for me.
My department likes to go out to Happy Hour every couple/few months , but I don't drink and prefer not to interact with my coworker in that envirnoment . I like my coworkers as coworkers , and prefer to get to know them in small talk . I'm a type of person to keep work and home life separate and try to limit my talk with coworkers about personal things and just talk about general things.
So my questions is : Does anyone else try to avoid outings with your department ? if so what type of reason do you give if you do it on a regular basis ? Right now I'm still new (under 6mths), so its not obvious but this is the first job that it seems like the whole department goes out and want to!
Also for those who don't drink how do you handle happy hour with coworkers? Because honestly I don't want to go into detail with them why I don't.
I don't drink (often) - so I normally just get an iced tea or diet coke. No one really cares. And if someone does care, that's really their problem, not mine.
As for participation - I don't actively seek it out, nor do I actively avoid it. If I can, and I feel like it, I go. This goes for just about any work related and non-work related functions. I think people like to hang out. But not everyone has the time/desire to do the same.
My department likes to go out to Happy Hour every couple/few months , but I don't drink and prefer not to interact with my coworker in that envirnoment . I like my coworkers as coworkers , and prefer to get to know them in small talk . I'm a type of person to keep work and home life separate and try to limit my talk with coworkers about personal things and just talk about general things.
So my questions is : Does anyone else try to avoid outings with your department ? if so what type of reason do you give if you do it on a regular basis ? Right now I'm still new (under 6mths), so its not obvious but this is the first job that it seems like the whole department goes out and want to!
Also for those who don't drink how do you handle happy hour with coworkers? Because honestly I don't want to go into detail with them why I don't.
Yep. I typically use my commute as an excuse (I live farther out than most and want to beat the worst of rush hour) or I'll say I have other plans after work.
When I do attend HH, I'll have one beer and then leave. If you don't drink alcohol, then order a soda or a water and sip on that. It would be really rude (and IMO immature) of your co-workers to ask why you're not drinking alcohol. There are many reasons why you choose not to, and some of those reasons are personal.
If a co-worker does comment on your drink, shut it down with "This is just what I prefer" and then change the subject.
FWIW, when I've attended work related happy hours/parties, I've never overheard anyone question another's drink choice.
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