Don't lick the goat!!!
Posted 10-29-2008 at 09:57 AM by MooksterL1
As a mother of two small boys, I often find myself in the position of using words together in a sentence that are ridiculous but meaningful, at least to my kids. Words such as "goat" and "lick" or "fish" and "cheese".
As the words "OMG! Stop licking the goat! You don't know where that goat has been!" came out of my mouth on Saturday I had an epiphany. While I have a very good idea exactly where the goat had been and my germaphobic tendencies are sending me to that happy place in my head even now, watching my three year old stand beside the fence at the petting zoo and lick a goat, I realized that I say bizarre but necessary sentences on a daily basis.
Sentences like:
"No honey, fish don't really like cheese."
"I know it hurts, but I'm not kissing the boo boo on your butt."
"Take that caterpillar out of your mouth right now!"
"I know the cat food looks like cereal, but it isn't! Now stop eating it!".
"No, you can't wear Spongebob underwear to the store as a hat."
"Tell me again exactly how you peed in your shoe."
"You flushed the entire roll of toilet paper!! Seriously??"
"I know you think you are a puppy, but the dog doesn't like it when you drink out of his bowl."
"Just how many crayons did you put down the vent anyway?"
"You cannot tattoo your little brother with a Sharpie!"
"No, you don't need the blue scissors to fix your hair!"
"Honey, that's not a tail and no you can't take your pants off and show everyone."
"I'm sorry. I know you are sad, but we can't buy a pet dinosaur on the internet."
"Well, we can try to find instructions to make a time machine, but I'm pretty sure that we can't go back in time to find your lost toy."
As the words "OMG! Stop licking the goat! You don't know where that goat has been!" came out of my mouth on Saturday I had an epiphany. While I have a very good idea exactly where the goat had been and my germaphobic tendencies are sending me to that happy place in my head even now, watching my three year old stand beside the fence at the petting zoo and lick a goat, I realized that I say bizarre but necessary sentences on a daily basis.
Sentences like:
"No honey, fish don't really like cheese."
"I know it hurts, but I'm not kissing the boo boo on your butt."
"Take that caterpillar out of your mouth right now!"
"I know the cat food looks like cereal, but it isn't! Now stop eating it!".
"No, you can't wear Spongebob underwear to the store as a hat."
"Tell me again exactly how you peed in your shoe."
"You flushed the entire roll of toilet paper!! Seriously??"
"I know you think you are a puppy, but the dog doesn't like it when you drink out of his bowl."
"Just how many crayons did you put down the vent anyway?"
"You cannot tattoo your little brother with a Sharpie!"
"No, you don't need the blue scissors to fix your hair!"
"Honey, that's not a tail and no you can't take your pants off and show everyone."
"I'm sorry. I know you are sad, but we can't buy a pet dinosaur on the internet."
"Well, we can try to find instructions to make a time machine, but I'm pretty sure that we can't go back in time to find your lost toy."
Total Comments 4
Comments
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Brilliant! I always wondered about the cat food over milk too!
Oh, and keep me posted about the Time Machine!
Wait! If I hit the Post Now button, will I wind up on a street corner with a car bumper above me and people starring at me from above?
Nevermind on the time machine!Posted 03-11-2009 at 04:28 PM by McGowdog
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So true
So cute and yet so true! You have a good, happy personality! Keep up the good work!Posted 03-24-2009 at 12:03 PM by cynwldkat
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OMG, these are funny. I don't recall seeing these things from my child. However, she did come home one day and asked if she could sleep with Jimmy. WHAT!Posted 04-13-2009 at 10:51 PM by Head coach
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Ha ha Mookster!! You know lucky charms cereal DOES look like cat food!! lmao
I love your sarcasm...wish you lived next door!
Shannon
p.s. love your hairPosted 04-29-2009 at 01:59 PM by shannon94
