Dating scene for women (early 30's) in Alaska? (moving to, company) - Anchorage - (AK) - Page 10 - City-Data Forum

YahYouBetcha · 06-16-2018, 04:17 AM

Thanks AKStafford!

PrettyInPink16 · 06-24-2018, 09:48 AM

Wow. Interesting thread. I'm glad that you made it to Alaska YahYouBetcha.

I am in the same boat as you are. I feel almost certain that I'll make the move to Alaska. I have one dear friend there and I'm apart of an organization that has an office in Fair Banks.

My reasons for wanting to live there is of course the scenery, the outdoor lifestyle and the opportunity to catch and eat as much fish as I like, haha, particularly salmon.

But I am a young single woman so when thinking of moving there I'm definitely considering the dating scene. I have no idea how anyone would think it abnormal or not a legitimate concern. (That's in response to some people insinuating that moving there to date was somehow unbecoming of you)

As far as the ratio goes. I'm torn. My friends and other women that live there, tell me that there is a difference and you can feel it.

There is also nothing wrong with wanting to make a lot of money, in my opinion.

And finding a guy who wants to live life as though he's on a permanent spring break, sounds like my type of guy, lol. Not sure why that's a bad thing.

Metlakatla · 06-24-2018, 01:04 PM

There is nothing wrong with "wanting to make a lot of money," but there is something wrong with believing that Alaska is some sort of cash cow where you can come and grab money and then run back to the -48. Lots of people still have that mentality even though the pipeline days have been over for decades, and almost everyone here who's lived in the state for any length of time can tell you about people who've come up "to make a lot of money" and have ended up broke and stranded.

It's Fairbanks, not Fair Banks, and as far as the famed ratio goes, anything anyone said about that was specific to Anchorage. The farther you get from Anchorage, the more lopsided the ratio. As far as "spring break mentality" the OP is in her 30s and has probably outgrown that kind of so-called mentality. Plenty of drunks in Alaska, though, so if that's your thing, I'm sure you'll get lucky.

I do wish the OP would return and share her experience with us, though.

YahYouBetcha · 06-26-2018, 02:31 AM

Hi PrettyInPink16, thanks, yeah you should definitely check out Alaska first before you decide to make the move. It's really great! I went to Fairbanks too while I was there, but I did not like it as much because it was more isolated, there were not as many things to do, and they have a harsher climate. But the people were super nice. It has a small-town feel. Anchorage is a large city with many more options in terms of shopping, entertainment, dining, nightlife, along with the outdoor activities.

Metlakatla, Hello again! "spring break mentality" hahaha. You are right; I don't really drink anymore, but I will go to bars to socialize. Also, I have heard that the male:female ratio increases the farther up you go outside of the cities. A resident of Fairbanks told me that, how there are more men in the Fairbanks area than women.

I will share my experience with the dating scene in Anchorage since that's the reason I created this thread lol. Firstly, I noticed that I was getting a lot more attention from guys whenever I would go out to run errands- moreso than I do in NYC because girls are a dime a dozen there- and I wasn't even trying to meet guys or impress anyone. I went on a dating app when I was there and talked to several guys. One guy was part Native Alaskan and is a healer for his tribe but also has a day job doing project management. We met up several times to drink coffee and talk. He was very nice and generous and turned out to be a good friend (nothing happened between us - he was older and seemed to be looking more for companionship.) He gave me the keys to his condo and let me sleep in the spare bedroom while I was there. I went on a few "dates"/hangouts with a 2nd guy who would take me exploring in nature. He is a cool dude. He works as an auto mechanic. Also- friendship status at this point. Now, the 3rd guy is a different story. We hit it off pretty quickly and are kind of dating now I think. The guys there though seem more possessive than guys I've met in the past. Like "where are you? what are you doing?" type-of-thing. Especially the 3rd guy who told me he wants to be in a serious relationship with me. I am not sure how I feel about him though. Plus, I've only known him for a week, so it's way too soon to jump into anything like that.

Overall, going on dates in Anchorage was a wonderful experience. WAY better than anything I've ever experienced in California and New York. I definitely didn't feel pressured to do anything outside of my comfort zone like I normally would in California and New York (i.e., the guy takes you out for dinner, now you are obligated to go back to his place with him.)

It was refreshing to just be able to be myself and be open and honest in all my interactions.

Another thing I noticed was that multiple people asked me why I had anxiety. People elsewhere don't normally ask me that- either because it's probably such a common thing down in the "Lower 48" or because people aren't interested/don't care.

I only went out to the bars once to check them out and yeah I noticed the drunks people in this thread spoke of who would order beer after beer- Not a good place to meet people.

If you make an effort to look cute (put on a nice dress, do your hair, etc.), then you will easily meet guys. You probably don't even need to do that, but I didn't have any other clothing with me (I had packed for a California trip because that's where I stayed during the winter and spring), so dresses were mostly what I wore. And yeah when I talk about the whole "maintaining appearances" thing, I mean personality-wise, just being able to be myself. With Guy #3, who I am sort of dating, I had an issue with the fact that he would obsessively message me, so I came right out and told him to quit it.

My advice to anyone looking to date in Alaska/Anchorage is to go on the dating apps or meet people at events and such. Stay out of the bars!!

Metlakatla · 06-26-2018, 11:18 AM

I'm glad you checked back in; I was wondering how things went for you after you arrived in Alaska. Not to go mizzle on you, but guy #3 has shown a couple of signs of being a classic abuser.

AlaskaErik · 06-26-2018, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Metlakatla

I'm glad you checked back in; I was wondering how things went for you after you arrived in Alaska. Not to go mizzle on you, but guy #3 has shown a couple of signs of being a classic abuser.

I agree. Guy number three sounds like one you don't want to get into a relationship with. He sounds like a psycho who would stalk you. Don't ignore those alarms bells going off inside your head. There are plenty of down-to-earth guys here.

riceme · 06-26-2018, 02:44 PM

^^I was going to say the same thing. Lots of red flags. And AlaskaErik's comment about not ignoring the alarm bells is right-on target. Always listen to your gut even if you can't put your finger on exactly what's wrong. You're right that something is wrong.

Arktikos · 06-26-2018, 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YahYouBetcha

If you make an effort to look cute (put on a nice dress, do your hair, etc.), then you will easily meet guys. You probably don't even need to do that, but I didn't have any other clothing with me (I had packed for a California trip because that's where I stayed during the winter and spring), so dresses were mostly what I wore.

No, you don't have to do that but it's greatly appreciated!

Way to go, telling the guy to quit texting you all the time.

Larry Siegel · 06-26-2018, 07:11 PM

From my female, formerly single friend in Alaska: The odds are good but the goods are odd.

Haolejohn · 06-26-2018, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YahYouBetcha

Hi PrettyInPink16, thanks, yeah you should definitely check out Alaska first before you decide to make the move. It's really great! I went to Fairbanks too while I was there, but I did not like it as much because it was more isolated, there were not as many things to do, and they have a harsher climate. But the people were super nice. It has a small-town feel. Anchorage is a large city with many more options in terms of shopping, entertainment, dining, nightlife, along with the outdoor activities.

Metlakatla, Hello again! "spring break mentality" hahaha. You are right; I don't really drink anymore, but I will go to bars to socialize. Also, I have heard that the male:female ratio increases the farther up you go outside of the cities. A resident of Fairbanks told me that, how there are more men in the Fairbanks area than women.

I will share my experience with the dating scene in Anchorage since that's the reason I created this thread lol. Firstly, I noticed that I was getting a lot more attention from guys whenever I would go out to run errands- moreso than I do in NYC because girls are a dime a dozen there- and I wasn't even trying to meet guys or impress anyone. I went on a dating app when I was there and talked to several guys. One guy was part Native Alaskan and is a healer for his tribe but also has a day job doing project management. We met up several times to drink coffee and talk. He was very nice and generous and turned out to be a good friend (nothing happened between us - he was older and seemed to be looking more for companionship.) He gave me the keys to his condo and let me sleep in the spare bedroom while I was there. I went on a few "dates"/hangouts with a 2nd guy who would take me exploring in nature. He is a cool dude. He works as an auto mechanic. Also- friendship status at this point. Now, the 3rd guy is a different story. We hit it off pretty quickly and are kind of dating now I think. The guys there though seem more possessive than guys I've met in the past. Like "where are you? what are you doing?" type-of-thing. Especially the 3rd guy who told me he wants to be in a serious relationship with me. I am not sure how I feel about him though. Plus, I've only known him for a week, so it's way too soon to jump into anything like that.

Overall, going on dates in Anchorage was a wonderful experience. WAY better than anything I've ever experienced in California and New York. I definitely didn't feel pressured to do anything outside of my comfort zone like I normally would in California and New York (i.e., the guy takes you out for dinner, now you are obligated to go back to his place with him.)

It was refreshing to just be able to be myself and be open and honest in all my interactions.

Another thing I noticed was that multiple people asked me why I had anxiety. People elsewhere don't normally ask me that- either because it's probably such a common thing down in the "Lower 48" or because people aren't interested/don't care.

I only went out to the bars once to check them out and yeah I noticed the drunks people in this thread spoke of who would order beer after beer- Not a good place to meet people.

If you make an effort to look cute (put on a nice dress, do your hair, etc.), then you will easily meet guys. You probably don't even need to do that, but I didn't have any other clothing with me (I had packed for a California trip because that's where I stayed during the winter and spring), so dresses were mostly what I wore. And yeah when I talk about the whole "maintaining appearances" thing, I mean personality-wise, just being able to be myself. With Guy #3, who I am sort of dating, I had an issue with the fact that he would obsessively message me, so I came right out and told him to quit it.

My advice to anyone looking to date in Alaska/Anchorage is to go on the dating apps or meet people at events and such. Stay out of the bars!!

For someone so educated, you don’t seem to be that smart. Seriously? You’re “dating” that guy? If you are, you need help.