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Husband and grown kids are atheist. Some days I am too. Once, we were all very active in the Methodist church where i was raised. Husband said 1 semester at Emory Theology school was all it took to push him over the edge.
We have 2 14-year-old girls who have never been to church and don't have a clue what it is all about. They have heard dinner table conversations and references to Sky Daddy, opiate of the masses and other negative (but true) references to Christianity and religion in general.
We are thinking of sending our girls to summer day camp not far from our home which is affiliated with the methodist church. Husband inquired of director (in a nice way) how much religion plays in the camper's life. Answer: prayers and blessing at meals and chapel once a week.
We like this camp because it offers several programs our girls are interested in, it is affordable, close to home, has a good reputation. At first husband (DH) was dead set against it but I'm very much for it. I think they are of the age where they need a frame of reference for religion other than their Dad's totally negative attitude. I think they need to know what Christianity is, how Christians are taught and how they worship. I also want them to be familiar with Christian music and hymns. I don't necessarily want them to BE Christians but at 14 every kid should be aware of what the hoopla is all about. We have talked to them about religion and at Christmas and Easter i tell them the significance these holidays have for Christians. DH is seeing more and more my view and agrees it is time.
Last year they attended a Buddhist day camp and had fun.
Before they go we will sit them down again to tell them about respect for others and how to show that respect. We've already talked to them about why they should at least be educated about religion.
At 14 they should be able to handle the disconnect between their family's views and the official church group views. It is reasonably good prep for life in general and going out among people with different beliefs. You do need to make it clear that they are guests - albeit paying guests - and that insulting the "host" and/or the host's views is rude and any quibble they have with what they are being told is part of the package of being there.
I think it's right and necessary that all children have basic religious literacy and at least some low grade experience interacting with religious people. Religion has had too much influence on society and culture for too long; a child who is ignorant of these things is at a disadvantage.
Whether the best way for them to get that, especially if it is their first time, is to have an unsupervised immersive experience under the control of theists for several days, strikes me as questionable. My impulse would be more to focus on educating them myself and take them to a few church services and the like. I would want to first be satisfied that they have a basic grasp of common religious memes and their critical thinking skills are sufficiently in place to deal with those memes.
This doesn't mean, by the way, that I'd get all honked off if one of my children were attracted to and wanted to experiment with religion, particularly during their middle school and high school years. My stepdaughter was interested in religion from a very young age and her mother, an atheist, used to read her bedtime stories from a children's Bible, sent her (and occasionally, barely able to contain her laughter at times, accompany her) to church. Eventually my stepdaughter went through confirmation class (Presbyterian) and announced to the shock and wonderment of her teacher and class, when it was all over, that she had concluded that god doesn't actually exist. She has not been active or interested to my knowledge in church since her senior year in high school when she was in that confirmation class.
My stepson is the opposite, always thought it was total bunk and still does. As for my own two children, their formative years occurred when I was still an evangelical Christian and I even home schooled them for awhile, and they never bought into any of it and are both unbelievers today.
Children need the freedom to believe what they believe and explore what they are curious about, and paradoxically, the best thing you can do sometimes is just not meddle. But at the same time I wouldn't throw them to the wolves without a transition, either. Maybe that's not what you're doing here, but I just am not seeing the context.
I think it is a good idea to teach kids about religion-all sorts of religions and let them make their own choice as to which path they follow.
That being said, I think at 14, they are mature enough to listen to what is being taught and can choose for themselves as to accept it or not. But you might want to advise them not to mention family beliefs. Tell them to let people ASSUME their beliefs are the same as everyone else there. They don't have to lie-just don't say anything, unless they are asked. Then, that might be tricky.
I think they are of the age where they need a frame of reference for religion other than their Dad's totally negative attitude. I think they need to know what Christianity is, how Christians are taught and how they worship. I also want them to be familiar with Christian music and hymns. I don't necessarily want them to BE Christians but at 14 every kid should be aware of what the hoopla is all about. We have talked to them about religion and at Christmas and Easter i tell them the significance these holidays have for Christians. DH is seeing more and more my view and agrees it is time.
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I'm confident that there are many ways to educate your children about the existence of religion without making them into religious camp infiltrators. No matter how accepting the camp may be of your children's non participation in the prayers and chapel, those things will still mark your kids as minority pariahs. You mention that you have talked with them about religion, and regardless of their upbringing, I don't see how it is possible that they have not already been exposed to the practice of Christianity via friends or the media.
They aren't old enough to speak with discretion or clarity. They will be found out as atheists and singled out for shame, ridicule and bullying.
I never said THEY are atheists. They are nothing really as far as religion. And this isn't a religious camp. No instructions are involved.Just blessings before meals and 1 hour of chapel on Friday before dismissal. It is a typical summer camp with horseback riding, kayaking, swimming, arts and crafts, cooking, animal care, gardening, etc. I went there myself as a young teen. It simply is AFFILIATED (sponsored) by the methodist church.
I'm confident that there are many ways to educate your children about the existence of religion without making them into religious camp infiltrators. No matter how accepting the camp may be of your children's non participation in the prayers and chapel, those things will still mark your kids as minority pariahs. You mention that you have talked with them about religion, and regardless of their upbringing, I don't see how it is possible that they have not already been exposed to the practice of Christianity via friends or the media.
Isn't there a secular camp available?
Again I never said they would not participate. They know to bow their heads during prayers (we have family members who do that) and of course they would attend chapel. What would be the purpose of trying to educate them about Christianity if we wanted to exclude them from chapel?
. What would be the purpose of trying to educate them about Christianity if we wanted to exclude them from chapel?
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I fail to see the supposed necessity of participatory education when the object is to learn about Christianity. I can see such a need if the object was to teach them to be Christians.
Are you also trying to educate them about Islam or Buddhism? Will personal experience be required in those cases as well?
We sent them to Buddhist Day Camp because apparently we felt experience in Buddhist Day camp was beneficial for them to learn ABOUT Buddhism. We were not trying to push them to become Buddhists. If there was an Islamic Day Camp geared towards their age we would consider sending them there as well. No plans to push them to become Islamic.
We want them to go to a Country Life day camp which gives them experience in animal husbandry, growing crops, poultry keeping, etc with absolutely no plans to have them be farmers some day.
Obviously we believe in participatory education.
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