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I think what I want right now is for her to just drop the whole thing, I really love my grandma but those last phone calls have been very painful.
Jesus It just occurred to me, what if my grandma discovered CD? I'd have exorcists on my doorstep a few days later.
Bless your heart, grandmas aren't easy to deal with sometimes, are they? Like I said before, Coos, assure her that you love her, but, gently remind her to leave such matters in God's hands, (yes, I know, you don't believe, but she does). Then you must tell her, that although you are aware of her concern for you, you really can't continue to have this discussion with her, as it is painful to you, (and, to her also, I'm sure, as she obviously believes she has your best interest at heart), and it serves no purpose. It is a delicate balance between firmness, and standing for what you believe, and gentle, loving respect. But, I'm certain you can do this in a gracious way.
but seeing my grandma do it and then imply that I wont be loved as much by her because of my lack of religion just makes me sick.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CelticLady1
you must tell her, that although you are aware of her concern for you, you really can't continue to have this discussion with her, as it is painful to you, (and, to her also, I'm sure, as she obviously believes she has your best interest at heart), and it serves no purpose. It is a delicate balance between firmness, and standing for what you believe, and gentle, loving respect. But, I'm certain you can do this in a gracious way.
coos, my heart aches for you in this situation. You have been given some excellant advice. I really like the advice that Reformed and CelticLady have given you. It sounds like you really love your grandma and don't want to lose that relationship. I realize that you are an atheist and that you entered your thread in the atheist sub-forum, but given the fact that your grandma is a Christian, I feel that listening to the advice of these two Christian's is the way to go. They have not asked you to deny who you are, but they have given you a very loving way to speak to Grandma. One thing that I would also add, I believe that there is no limit to God's grace. He, and He alone, know what your future holds. This might be the way I would handle my grandma in this situation, "Grandma, I love you very much and I respect your beliefs. However, at this time in my life, I am afraid that I am having a hard time grasping your beliefs and applying them to my life. I do not wish to hurt you and would like it best if you do not go into my Facebook any more and that we no longer have conversations about my belief system. If your God is who you believe Him to be, then if He so chooses, one day He will bring me to Him and I will accept Him into my heart."
Hopefully, your grandma will hear what you are saying. You have not denied who you are, but you have left the door open for your grandma to believe that there is still hope that one day you might understand and accept her beliefs. I think that it also takes the pressure off of her in believing that she has a responsibility to you and her God.
I hope that you can find peace in your heart and that you and your Grandma can resolve this situation.
Perhaps you should create a thread in the Christian forum with a link to this thread and ask for their advice as well. Just be sure that they are aware that converting to please somebody is not an option. Nor is pretending.
Thats not a bad idea Haaziq, maybe just for the sake of simplicity one of the mods could move this to R&P forum. I posted this in the A&A subforum because I thought it was more relevant there but It didn't occur to me that people might think I'm not open to advice from Christians et al.
Oh and everyone got it right; I do love my grandma very much and thats the gospel truth
Just start a thread titled 'Your thoughts?' and give a link to this thread. There might be some atheists who haven't given their opinions yet, so the issue should be brought to the attention of both sides of the spectrum.
Location: The world, where will fate take me this time?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Haaziq
Just start a thread titled 'Your thoughts?' and give a link to this thread. There might be some atheists who haven't given their opinions yet, so the issue should be brought to the attention of both sides of the spectrum.
Hey Haaziq, your posts reminded me of a concept that exists in dharmic religions called vertical conversion, what is this?
well horizontal conversion is to switch religions, or to choose one if you don't have one, and vertical conversion is to use the spiritual principles to become a better person.
Vertical conversion encourages and helps a Christian to be a better Christian and a Muslim to be a better Muslim Any Hindu saint will ask a Christian to have faith in Christ and go to Church regularly. He will ask a Muslim to have faith in Allah and perform the religious duties ordained in the Koran sincerely. He will ask an atheist to try his hardest to be a good and loving person, vertical conversion does not support horizontal conversion from one faith to another.
What are your thoughts guys, should we start a thread about vertical conversion?
coosjoaquin you might want to have a conversation with her and explain why you feel the way you do and that you respect her beliefs also. My son (30) wrote our whole family that he felt he was an atheist and I think since almost everyone is a born again Christian was waiting for the attact. He said he was a bit surprised that everyone honored his beliefs and said they loved him regardless. I glad that it turned at that way for him. That's how it should be.
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). Then you must tell her, that although you are aware of her concern for you, you really can't continue to have this discussion with her, as it is painful to you, (and, to her also, I'm sure, as she obviously believes she has your best interest at heart), and it serves no purpose. It is a delicate balance between firmness, and standing for what you believe, and gentle, loving respect. But, I'm certain you can do this in a gracious way.
