New in Atlanta..I don't know a soul!!

[neil0311]

Originally Posted by Shagbark Hickory

Sorry, that's not been my finding.
I hope I didn't offend you...

You didn't offend me at all. You gave me a good laugh. The part about the ball and chain was especially humorous, and gave insight into your perspective. I can see how younger people without children can make assumptions, even if they're wrong.

I just wonder how many families you surveyed to come up with your finding.

[kayrob]

Hook up with some of the other young cats from where you're working at and do some happy hour type things. Of course I say this not even knwoing if you drink at all.

[RainyRainyDay]

I've been amused by the exchanges between Shagbark and Neil re whether people with children have any fun.

Here's my take. Humans and our lives are not static. Our interests and preferences evolve and adjust as we go through different life stages. If I (50s, married, parent of teen, hard-working professional) was still looking for the same kind of experiences I wanted when I was in my early 20s, that would be sad and pathetic, as well as impractical. Of course, I still like some of the things I liked when I was younger, but as far as some other things are concerned, I've been there and done that. Thank goodness.

It's part of the nature of youth to be self-centered and dismissive. To some folk in their teens and 20s, 30-somethings who are devoting their time and money to raising their young kids seem pretty tragic, evidently, and those of us who are even older, well I guess we're practically dead, especially since we're not looking to participate in the young singles dating scene.

I hope the OP finds some friends soon. And to those who regard suburban family life as a dreary wasteland - hey, you won't always be a cool young person. The good news is that, when you find yourself leading some kind of middle-aged lifestyle that seems appalling now, you won't actually feel like slitting your wrists (unless, of course, you're suffering mental health problems). If you're like most people, you'll be happy with the choices you've made and are making.

[Shagbark Hickory]

See, Neil and RainyRainy are taking what I said to mean that people that are M.W.C (Married w/children) don't want to have any fun or don't have any fun.
There's no doubt in my mind you have fun, but you have fun with your children and you have fun with other families that are MWC.

The message I hoped would get across was that when a single guy says to a married guy, lets go to happy hour after work, he says "Nah, can't gotta get home or I'll get in trouble".
Or when a single gal says to a MWC gal, lets go do this or lets go do that, it's "Oh but I don't have anyone to watch the kids" or "I have to pick up the kids from (whatever)"

And the fact is right now people are strapped. They were spawning like mad when times are good. Now when times are not good and job security isn't there, and they got all these kids and their marriages are on the rocks, it's even worse. MWC are broke or don't want to spend any money or do anything.
Each child costs on average $250,000 until they are adults. No wonder MWC 30- & 40 something's idea of a good time is heading to the pizza parlor with the kids then go home and watch a movie. That's great but you're never going to see your single friends again with an itinerary like that. It's like nobody's heard of a sitter.

So once again, I reiterate the problem is that while there may be single people in atlanta, the vast majority of the young ones (the age of the OP) are concentrated in town. The rest are spread out over an area that is 3 times the geographic area of London, England with a population that is half as big.

[neil0311]

Shagbark Hickory, I understand your point, and there are definitely some elements of truth there for some people, but I also think you've painted with a very broad brush, maybe based on people you know.

The fact is that not everyone is "broke" but you're right that most people, including younger people witout kids, are cutting back due to the economy. I think you also mix the difference between people with younger children and those with older kids, as well as the fact that many married people go out for "guys night" or "girls night." I used to go out with folks at work for a beer many nights, which I don't do as much now, but because I work more from home and not due to being married.

Just so you know...many married people with both younger and older kids do have social lives. Concerts, ballgames, and yes...going to the homes of other families where the kids and the parents socialize. I bet I've taken in more Braves games in the last 2 months than you have (and had more $7 beers than I care to count), and that's just one example. We hike with our kids on Kennesaw Mtn and go ice skating, which to me is more fun than chugging down a 12 pack. It's all perspective.

Do I go bar hopping, driving drunk, and wake up with strangers...well no, but I don't miss those days one bit (well...maybe a little ). The key here is that everyone is different. There are very active married people who do things with their children and there are very inactive 20 somethings who sit around and play XBOX all night in their parents' basement. There is no one size fits all.

[Shagbark Hickory]

Originally Posted by neil0311

Do I go bar hopping, driving drunk, and wake up with strangers...well no, but I don't miss those days one bit (well...maybe a little ).

WOW! Talk about broad brushes.

The benefit of choosing to be unmarried without children is not so you can get drunk and party all day. It's because of the freedom you have to do what you want and the money to actually do stuff. To see the world, to have free time to do things you enjoy. All those meetups on meetup.com All of lifes adventures get locked in the disney vault forever when you have kids.

[RainyRainyDay]

Originally Posted by Shagbark Hickory

All of lifes adventures get locked in the disney vault forever when you have kids.

How poetic. It's a good thing that we're all different, and I wish you a happy child-free life, Hickory.

To others, however, having children is one of life's biggest adventures. Amazing to you no doubt, but true for many of us, now and throughout human history.

Personally, I didn't care for Disney either before, during or after having a young child. What a quaintly American circumscribed idea, that having kids equates to taking up a fondness for the Disney corporation and all its works.

[neil0311]

Originally Posted by Shagbark Hickory

WOW! Talk about broad brushes.

Not a broad brush at all. I was just relating/commenting on some of my own experiences when I was younger, although I would bet that others may share the same experiences at that age.

[Nigprince1087]

Thanks for all the suggestions. I'm working on it but not alot of success so far..i'll keep ya'll updated!!

[shalc]

I would recommend joining a local sports team (you said you played football) or club that interests you - maybe a softball league or kickball or football if you can find it. I met a lot of people here when i joined a mtn biking club and later on when I started rowing. It's nice to have something in common with folks other than the fact that you work together.