Friends and neighbors leaving for the mainland? (transplants, 2014)

[cagary]

Do you feel that more of your friends and neighbors are leaving the Big Island for the mainland because of economic conditions.

I know there is always an ebb and flow on the island, but do you feel that more than usual number of people are leaving?

Someone told me a few months ago that Hawaiian sold around 4000 one way tickets in one month. There could be a few different reasons for buying one way, but certainly one of them would be that you were leaving for good.

[hotzcatz]

Several years ago there was a big exodus but the folks remaining seem to be staying. Most of the ones who stayed are the ones who have family here. The ones without much of a community or family have wandered off. There were also a few who got upside down on their mortgages and went back to the mainland but most of this was in 2007 through 2009.

[Dreaming of Hawaii]

A lot of us "snowbirds" who live part time in Hawaii and part time on the mainland buy one-way tickets. Sometimes our return dates are uncertain, so we don't buy our return tickets until we know for sure when we'll return.

[CyberCity]

That approximate 5 year cycle is never-ending of those who find that the "dream" is not exactly what they expected. For example, 2012 is seeing those leave who came in 2007. 2013 it will be those who came in 2008. 2014, bye to those who came in 2009. Etc. You get the picture.

Of course, many come with the idea that they are only going to stay for awhile. They have an exit plan already in place, they just come to enjoy a few years of fun in the sun.

Others hang around until they start missing their mainland families too much, or grandkids start growing up without them, or their employment is found to be deadend.

It is not anything new. And it will always continue. Which is why many who have lived here decades (or were born here) hesitate to make close friends with recent arrivals. Polite to newcomers? Yes. Friendly? Yes. Carpool? Yes. BBQs? Yes. Close deep friendships? Not until they've passed the "10 year" mark.

[Tiger Beer]

Originally Posted by CyberCity

Of course, many come with the idea that they are only going to stay for awhile. They have an exit plan already in place, they just come to enjoy a few years of fun in the sun.

I'd imagine this would fit quite a few people. It's not unique to Hawaii either. That also seems to be the case with most popular cities as well, like New York, Miami, Los Angeles, etc.

People move there, try it out, see what it's like....get the experience, and than go try something else out. Generally, they rent. That's probably the bulk of 'transplants'.

The only ones I'd really worry about, are the ones who are selling the house somewhere else, never been to their dream destination place, are trying to buy the next house before they even arrive, asking about schools for their kids, and curious about job possibilities...all at the same time.

[Fredesch]

People come and go everywhere, in the Washington DC area people come because they got a job. Some people stay a few years and others you never get rid of. People move away either for work, tired of being to far away from family or just get tired of the area or the traffic.

Maybe folks leave the BI for similar reasons work, family or just get tired of it.

[terracore]

Originally Posted by Fredesch

People come and go everywhere, in the Washington DC area people come because they got a job. Some people stay a few years and others you never get rid of. People move away either for work, tired of being to far away from family or just get tired of the area or the traffic.

Maybe folks leave the BI for similar reasons work, family or just get tired of it.

You have a good point- if you poke around the city-data forums you see this "phenomenon" isn't unique to Hawaii. What is unique is that people in Hawaii tend to make a big deal out of it. I spent 15 years in Alaska and although the phenomenon of people cycling in and out seems to follow the exact same cycle as Hawaii, Alaskans are EXCITED to make friends with newcomers. I talked to some old timers in Alaska about that and they told me that in the "olden days" if somebody didn't take the newcomers under their wing they wouldn't survive their first winter. And by "survive their first winter" I don't mean that they miss their family and go back to the mainland, I mean that they WOULDN'T SURVIVE THEIR FIRST WINTER.

To me, the argument that newcomers aren't welcome until they have passed some sort of "test of time" has nothing to do with the "practical" arguments that I keep reading (or else that would be true anywhere that has a revolving door- which it's not). The real answer is much more simpler than that: It's part of the culture.

[whtviper1]

Terracore - I think it is more than just the culture - moving to Alaska - or even places like N. Dakota, S. Dakota, Montana, etc is very different than the person who moves to Hawaii. Yep, part of it culture but lets face it, you don't typically move to Alaska for the weather - and just about every dreamer post is about how much they hate the current weather - most people can't make it in Hawaii, most move back within 2 years - they can't take the massive cut in compensation and the higher cost of living - it doesn't matter how much I welcome them if they can't pay the bills.

And jeez, these posts of moving to one of the most remote places on the planet with $10,000 or less - that is just plain silly and irresponsible.

I'll edit to add - all the turnover of residents in Hawaii isn't good - just like a business who has a lot of turnover has issues. At this point, it is in the hundreds - I've seen so many come and go I've lost track. How do you build relationships?

[hotzcatz]

You build relationships with people who have family here and folks that were born here and have lived here for years. Those are the folks that will stick around. You can be friends with newcomers, but they are gonna wander off again more than likely so you don't get too involved since it's just temporary.

The folks who don't fit on the mainland are probably safe to make friends with since they don't have much reason to go back.

[willowkim]

My husband and I lived on the island for 3 months in 2011 and will be moving there full-time in the next month or two.

In planning our move, we have connected with quite a few former classmates or friends who have made the big move to Hawaii and didn't make it. We've talked quite in-depth with these folks and it seems to fall around a couple themes, which I know are nothing new to these boards:

1) Nearly all of them had never lived anywhere but the town where they grew up. Every social network, all family, all jobs, lifestyle, everything they know is ONE place on the mainland. Also, they've never spent any time in another culture. They really did expect it to be all sunshine and rainbows and to be just like their "old lives" except with sun and beaches.

2) They've only vacationed in Hawaii, never lived outside of a resort or hotel, never shopped for food or went to Costco in the middle of a Saturday afternoon, or tried to drive the highway during rush hour or in the afternoon when all the flights arrive. Bugs might freak them out. Slow driving and letting people turn left in front of you definitely irritate them.

3) They didn't engage in any sort of community (other than where they work) on the island. Well, unless you count going to bars and watching sports.

My husband and I (and our now 3 1/2 year old daughter) met other parents at the playgrounds, at the beach. My daughter played with other transplant kids and local kids. We found a great church and made friends there (when we came for vacation this past December, we kept seeing people we knew at KTA and around town). We're exploring volunteer opportunities and ways to actively give back to the local community.

But, we are not typical mainlanders. We grew up in the midwest, lived on the east coast (Boston) and the west coast (western WA state, couldn't be more different). I studied in Europe in college, and have done quite a bit of traveling. My husband lived in the south (he's pretty blase about B52s). We have family all over and never see many of them except every year or two, which won't change on the islands.

To me, it seems a no-brainer that you have to get involved in some kind of community when you move to a new place... church, volunteering, even taking lessons in something (paddleboard, surfing, art), or any kind of group that does something you're interested in. The island has so many opportunities. But of course it's not for everyone!