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Hi, Everyone I have to say I am glad I came upon this board. Heres my predicament. Hubby and I and 4 kids moved here to Fort Wayne IN from Pennsylvania, near PHilly, for a better opportunity job wise, got the house have settled in. Was told it was cheaper here. Yes if you buy a house. Groceries are more expensive you have to rent your books not buy them for the kids just to go to public school and buy all of their supplies to. The pay this company is giving my hubby, every month it has changed as to when he gets his commission. The first of the month, oh we're going to change that, the second week of the month, oh whenever we want to pay you. His commission is part of his earnings agreement to work here not a bonus. There was the relocation ISSUES $$ in the beginning when we first got here. Apparently we owed money back to them and they didn't itemize what they would pay, just customary closing costs, that to me is the whole ball of wax. Well they got picky afterwards and made us pay a nice chunk back. We were promised a bonus that was taken back because of the relo. Anyway without going on and on. He has been lied to and many of the people that hired him either quit or were laid off. The company was downsizing for financial reasons. I know, we walked right into that. Well he wanted a better opportunity, but the money he was officially promised will be here next month. This has caused us to almost divorce in the process of fighting over this money issue. His relo agreement is up in April and we wouldn't owe a dime after him being here a year. I have to say the people here are kind of reclusive, they don't strike up conversation unless they themselves are from the east coast, I think we're a bit more emotional and willing to let our guard down a little. I am just not used to it and to top it all off I had homesickness for 4 months. I live in a huge 3600 square foot house and not that I am crying about it, but sometimes a house doesn't make the difference even though we needed it. Its almost like you have to know people your whole life for them to let you in their inner circle to even converse with them here. I have heard this from several people by the way. Its nice but its not. Its just different, could be they are just not as social here. I don't know. One thing I do know is that we vacationed in Myrtle Beach one year and we absolutely loved it. My hubby likes Charleston. I love warm weather and theres alot of snow here in the winter. That is great for the kids and all, but I am to my wits end I think. If the pay doesn't size up, really, by April 30th we are outta here. So Charleston or more north I think we'd go to. I want to know from anyone who has relocated what your experience was like and what the job market is like. My hubby would like to work on getting his degree, hes almost at 6 figures without one, not bad for no degree. We just had good intentions when we came here and although our kids are getting used to it. It just feels like a holding station right now to me. I guess til we find what we want to do. So do you all love it in Charleston or what. How do they treat outsiders til you become locals. Sorry if I vented to much info. I am just pi$$ed at his company thats all and long for the east coast again. We're working through the mess btw and we're not going to divorce. He sees how unhappy I am. I am trying my best to look on the brighter side, but it doesn't seem to be getting any brighter. Anyone have an experience like this to share. I'd love to hear about it.
Always, always, always, get compensation packages in writing. Some companies will balk at that but that's probably because they are just telling you what you want to hear and know they don't want to be held legally responsible by being contractually obligated to pay what they promised.
We did and thats our whole thing, do you get a lawyer or keep your job. There are many things I not surprised about now and know in the future what to look for and stay on top of. We made some mistakes but we felt we were being smart and thank-god we speak up for ourselves. It just was and is still a little messy. You can only push it so far until its your job then what?? thanks for the reply!!
Mommapc
Sometimes its just best to cut your losses and do what makes you, as a family, the happiest. While it does help, money is not everything. Keeping your family together is the most important. I understand alot of what you are feeling, the cold, the lies and the closed-off people. You will certainly not find the weather and people a problem in Charleston. You might also want to look at Raleigh, NC.
What kind of work does your husband do? That info will be a great start for us to help you. Take a few moments to read through the threads here and I'm sure you will start packing your bags and heading south!
Hi Mommapc-first let me tell you how sorry I am for your tough experience in IN. Sounds like the advice from vamtncat is right on. You have to do what's best for your family and keeping harmony is huge. Let us know if you have any specific questions and we can try to steer you in the right direction. Does your husband want to leave as well?
Well, we talked the other day and he said he spoke with his boss about the income, turns out he can change when he gets his check. The money will kick in here soon and then tax time is going to roll around. Plus the government bonus check the feds are talking about right now, hopefully will come to fruition. I am hopeful it will get better, it was just a rough ride all this time 7 months now to be exact. I have to say we are going to give this place a chance. April was our cut off date for when we would get the heck out of here if things didn't turn around. I vented the other day out of extreme frustration. In my mind I am giving this company a chance. They are also giving my husband a chance and he is so loyal and gives his 110% with every job he has ever had. He is an agressive go-getter and gets noticed, by doing things normal people wouldn't think to do. I always kid with him and call him a car salesman. He always tries to sell me on things, since I am a hard sell, but he's good at it. We absolutely love the carolinas especially someplace near the beach or within driving distance. If we don't move within the next year to NC or SC then it will be probably when we retire at least thats what we talked about. I hope I didn't offend anyone with my posts, but I also did see on another board on here that Fort Wayne has one of the highest depression rates in the country, it may have rubbed off on me. I am thankful you all have replied as I am slowly moving forward with my guard way up. We'll see if this pans out, if not off we go. I think this is a great place for people to get someone to relate to them. Its not like you can pick a house and your neighbors are going to be perfect at least you can find out more specific things on here that statistics don't show. Thanks much and I'll post a couple of weeks from now to let you all know how its going. I appreciate your genuine concerns.
I'm glad to hear that things are a bit better today. I hope the sun is shining up there, even if it's chilly. That always helps matters. Best of luck as you all stick together and give it some more time. It sounds like you are doing the right thing.
Hey there MommaPC, I so understand what you and your family are going through as my husband and I went through the same thing when we decided to leave CA. after 30 yrs and move back to OK where I was from originally and all my family lives in OK too. Well we moved to a small town ( aren't they all small?)in eastern OK because it was prettier than western OK where I am from ( and far enough from relatives) well this town was terrible on my husband, I got along alright, but then I never meet a stranger. But my poor husband is from PA. and moved there from CA. every day at his work they would tell him to go back where he came from or they would make yankee remarks to him. It took us 5 yrs. but wee got out of there and moved to MO. We wonder now what took us so long,It is wonderful here in MO. we live on a lake and its like a resort town so everybody is from somewhere else. People here are so nice I still have to pinch myself. I feel for you and your family because people and their ignorance is what will make it hard on you. Good luck.
Last edited by califokie; 01-24-2008 at 07:01 PM..
Reason: misspelled word
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Hi and thanks for the replies
been there, done that
where I was from originally and all my family lives in OK too. Well we moved to a small town ( aren't they all small?)in eastern OK because it was prettier than western OK where I am from ( and far enough from relatives)
well this town was terrible on my husband, I got along alright, but then I never meet a stranger. But my poor husband is from PA. and moved there from CA. 
