Okay, so after being here for approximately 10 weeks, we still love it here.
Our neighborhood is into phase 2 of development and is stilll kinda new around our end of the hood, lots of empty half built houses.. Our kids are settled into school, utility and cable bills are rolling in, got our first avon catalog -- our move is official..
We've got a few neighbors and they're all nice but real lightweights when it comes time to have a couple of beers and sitting around and talking about the good old days. You know, walking up hill both ways to school (I actually did that), having to plow a field by myself (did that too), castrating donkeys in the backyard (didn't do this one), etc..
I know a lot of you all are looking down here for places to live and can't decide where to look or go for your housing needs so I thought I'd tell you about the house next door to us.
The place next door to us is brand spanking new -- I can still hear the faint echos of la-bamba playing from the carpet guys who were there last week. It still has that new chimichanga smell that we all love so much...
It's also got corian counter tops, gleaming chrome plastic faucet fixtures, standard get your wife drunk rug burn carpets and last but not least - vinyl siding!! No more painting.
Not to be too weird but I decided that it would be in our best interest to take applications for people who are interested in living next to us.
I've devised a simple yet complex set of questions to test not only your emotional stability but also your tolerence for stupidity, so here goes..
1) Do you own more tools than me?
2) Can I borrow them?
3) If I keep a tool longer than 10 days does it become mine?
4) Can I loan it to others without asking?
5) Do you have young daughters?
( see, right away you were thinking that I was some kind of strange balding old fat pervert
but I was thinking that my daugther is 12 and could always use more friends)
Not to go off on a tangent but I have finally determined that little girls are viscous... Maybe it's just the way I see it or the way my daughter ignores me and I want to push her out of the car. Before moving here my daughters friends all lived far enough away that you had to 'schedule' time for them to get together. Scheduled pickup and dropoffs, Sleepovers were precise and checklist driven. Here, it's different and part of the reason that we moved...
The doorbell rings and there are all kinds of kids at the door.. My son welcomes all other young dirt encrusted pre-pubescent, playstation playing boys with glee. Just another somebody to see who can make a hand print highest on the wall and shovel in whatever morsels of food that are left unguarded. Another participant to see who can make my wife yell the loudest to make them stop jumping, running, farting, snorting, yelling etc.. I can almost time it from their entry in the front door to the 'Why don't you guys go outside and play?' question from her. My son hasn't figured out the monthly time frame yet. Someday he'll be glad to join me on my monthly garage cleaning day(s). So far he's clueless and takes the abuse. Not that it took me over 15 years to realize that standing in the garage for 8 hours with a pushbroom in my hand and staring blankly onto the driveway was safer than trying to help in the house with something.
Back to the daughter thing.
Our daughter on the other hand is different story.. She'll get some 'friends' dinging the doorbell and based on an opinion formed within .7 seconds she'll decide whether or not they are worthy to be in her presence or not... Uhh, sorry you who I have never met before, but I am extremely busy watching tv and eating yodels so I'll see you at some other time.. Bye, later, slam.. I'll mention that she was kind of rude in talking to so and so and I'll get the standard evil glare of disbelief then a Marsha Brady hair flip as she strolls back to whatever non-helpful task she was involved with before she was interrupted.
6) Can you drink a beer or two on a Tuesday night. (This is not a strict requirement and drinking on a school night is not the norm but it in itself is a test of your ability to not leave me alone and have to actually talk to my wife. (Just kidding Honey bunny if you're reading this))
7) Does your wife mind if I wear my mirrored sunglasses when her 18 year old neice comes to visit? (just kidding!!!)
Hrrmmm.. I guess being a simpleton is good cause that's all the questions that I have for the moment. I'll come up with more depending on what tools you have.
I hope you all realize that my post is all in fun (except for wanting to push my 12 year old daughter out of the car)
We really love it here in Huntersville and there really is a beautiful 3 br house next to us for sale and I think that a savvy buyer could really get a deal on it since sales seemed to have slowed down a bit.
Just wondering, has anyone eaten and Max and Erma's and liked it?