A poem by me ... (believe, sin, eternity, spiritual)

[Ironmaw1776]

I wrote this after my brother died ...



There is time to tell me where i'm at,
and space to show me where I'm from
There is all this to make so little sense,
And nothing to give ... so give me some.

When I walk i run, when i run I fall ...
I see it all, as if it were some silly child's game
What is this and where is that,
does this ball belong to that bat?

Time is here to tell me, space is here to show me ...

When did i agree to all of this?
Torrents of feces that flow like a sewage ocean
I'm neck deep in it, but I'm told it doesn't matter ...
That nothing really matters

Because in the end it all falls apart
consumed by the pressure it endures throughout all that has been
Call it entropy, call it sin ...

This part goes this way, and the other goes that
Division is paramount to keeping it all intact
Because if things don't separate, they cant come back together
And coming together is the feather in the hat of God.

So name it and watch it go away
See it turn and die in a furious display of light and sound
With vibrations that pound out the shake the ground of everything you believe in ...
Call it decay, call it sin ...

Crazy, so the sun sets ...
Dawn breaks to morning breaks to noon
Evening creeps on in and soon,
the sun is seen no more as he passes beyond the doors of heaven.

The moon his silent witness
shines brilliant in his absence
as the rays of the sun are reflected from the surface of the moon.

The stars, they carry her
lunar queen as she mourns
for the passing of her lord

Across the sky she takes flight
she changes her faces as she changes our lives
until she is seen no more in the night

We have seen its coming
Time tells us something about the nothing
from whence it all began

And to that ocean of eternity without bound
we all come to that which was never done in the presence of space and time

So reason is set to rhyme
in the presence of space and time
So that those who know the reason might become
by reasons own becoming.



Edit:

Chew it up and then spit it out, or swallow it and say ... YUMMY!




Peace ...

[Ironmaw1776]

And no one says anything ... ?

[herefornow]

Originally Posted by Ironmaw1776

I wrote this after my brother died ...

The sun is seen no more as he passes beyond the doors of heaven.

The moon his silent witness, shines brilliant in his absence

I'm not much of a poet, and I really don't know how to critique poetry, but the lines above are really beautiful, if you ask me.

Thank you

[helios666]

I think it is a wonderful poem, and it's very generous of you to share something that is surely very personal to you.

[little elmer]

Like myrrh you have been crushed, and so the fragrance doth rise...

[Ironmaw1776]

Hey thanks for the response Guys ... I suppose i should have posted this is the poetry sub-forum. Is there a poetry sub-forum? If not maybe there should be ...



Peace ...

[ans57]

Originally Posted by Ironmaw1776

I wrote this after my brother died ...



There is time to tell me where i'm at,
and space to show me where I'm from
There is all this to make so little sense,
And nothing to give ... so give me some.

When I walk i run, when i run I fall ...
I see it all, as if it were some silly child's game
What is this and where is that,
does this ball belong to that bat?

Time is here to tell me, space is here to show me ...

When did i agree to all of this?
Torrents of feces that flow like a sewage ocean
I'm neck deep in it, but I'm told it doesn't matter ...
That nothing really matters

Because in the end it all falls apart
consumed by the pressure it endures throughout all that has been
Call it entropy, call it sin ...

This part goes this way, and the other goes that
Division is paramount to keeping it all intact
Because if things don't separate, they cant come back together
And coming together is the feather in the hat of God.

So name it and watch it go away
See it turn and die in a furious display of light and sound
With vibrations that pound out the shake the ground of everything you believe in ...
Call it decay, call it sin ...

Crazy, so the sun sets ...
Dawn breaks to morning breaks to noon
Evening creeps on in and soon,
the sun is seen no more as he passes beyond the doors of heaven.

The moon his silent witness
shines brilliant in his absence
as the rays of the sun are reflected from the surface of the moon.

The stars, they carry her
lunar queen as she mourns
for the passing of her lord

Across the sky she takes flight
she changes her faces as she changes our lives
until she is seen no more in the night

We have seen its coming
Time tells us something about the nothing
from whence it all began

And to that ocean of eternity without bound
we all come to that which was never done in the presence of space and time

So reason is set to rhyme
in the presence of space and time
So that those who know the reason might become
by reasons own becoming.



Edit:

Chew it up and then spit it out, or swallow it and say ... YUMMY!




Peace ...

I am a poetry lover...therefore...
Poetry is filled with symbols and allegories that require more sensitivity to enjoy. They only hold a meaning to those who go beyond, and into the spiritual realm where one could hear the murmur of a passing breeze...

Beautiful Ironmaw...thank you for sharing!

[ahigherway]

Hi Ironmaw1776!
I admire your writing skills! I wish I was a poet, but alas... sometimes I don't even write what I mean to write!!

Still, I enjoy reading people's works, I think they are a gift and a "glimpse" into eternity, in a way.
Do you write often? Do you have a website? What inspires you most?

Blessings,
brian