The Importance of Following God's Ordained Order Within the Family Unit (punishment, Bible)
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I never wanted a subject in my kingdom, I wanted a partner for my life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wardendresden
A real "leader" doesn't need to give commands---he leads in such a way that others want to follow.
Over and over the weak demand authority, but over and over Jesus demands we live as examples.
The issue is not leading as examples, which is what a head should do. The question asked was how does one have the responsibility without the authority?
That's like telling me I have the responsibility for running a Dietary Department, but do not have the authority to enforce compliance with policies of the company.
I think you are stuck with an authoritarian mindset. I spent almost my entire professional career as a compliance officer---no authority to stop or change any actions by the companies I worked for. All I had was knowledge and persuasive skills.
Authoritarianism is the worst kind of family leadership.
As Confucius said, " An acceptable leader, the people fear, a better leader the people respect, the best leader, the people say, 'We did it ourselves.'"
My understanding from Jesus is that we should be the very best at our relationship with others. Did He not say, "Be perfect as my Father in Heaven is perfect." Outside of a close relationship with Jesus that is impossible. But in Him and through Him nothing is impossible.
But if one doesn't have Him at the center of their life, then authoritarianism is the way the world does it. "Christians" who want to slide into the world's way of living their lives will always look for scripture to justify failure to walk the narrow and difficult path that Jesus laid before us
Last edited by Wardendresden; 03-03-2014 at 09:42 PM..
A very good article pertaining to the family order of the Man being the head of the family.
A comment was made today in fellowship with the importance of the man being the head of the family. What does that mean exactly? How does a man execute this role and what role does the woman have?
An example was made elsewhere of a wife of a man that wore a dress that he found to sexy out.. so he asked her to not wear it.. I think this is a good example of how the concept of headship is exercised correctly..
Another area would be child raising.. a point was made in fellowship today about the need for a head over the house and not a "partnership".. the result would be the children running the show.. more precisely the youngest running the show..
Is this your experience? Obviously this is an extremely important concept to understand for a healthy family unit. It's important to understand it how God intended it to be understood.
This religiously 'entitled' gendered power imbalance is one of the main reasons why heterosexual couples can have so many problems and why there is still so much domestic violence in the world.
When some men feel they are 'entitled' to have their way because they are male, they can act like 6 foot tantrumming 2 year olds.
I think you are stuck with an authoritarian mindset. I spent almost my entire professional career as a compliance officer---no authority to stop or change any actions by the companies I worked for. All I had was knowledge and persuasive skills.
Authoritarianism is the worst kind of family leadership.
As Confucius said, " An acceptable leader, the people fear, a better leader the people respect, the best leader, the people say, 'We did it ourselves.'"
My understanding from Jesus is that we should be the very best at our relationship with others. Did He not say, "Be perfect as my Father in Heaven is perfect." Outside of a close relationship with Jesus that is impossible. But in Him and through Him nothing is impossible.
[b]But if one doesn't have Him at the center of their life, then authoritarianism is the way the world does it. "Christians" who want to slide into the world's way of living their lives will always look for scripture to justify failure to walk the narrow and difficult path that Jesus laid before us[/B ]
Amen, Wardendresden !
I've always believed one who walks in the mind set of authoritarianism (demanding) is usually coming from some type of insecurities within their heart and need to feel in control of most situations in order too coverup the deep insecurities in their life.
It is so true that "Christians who want to slide into the world's way of living their lives will always look for scripture to justify failure to walk the narrow and difficult path that Jesus laid before us" and others definitely can discern this in the ones who walk this path.
I personally see nothing wrong when a couple come into a situation where there maybe some sort of disagreement that they both go individually and pray privately and come back together with hearts soften in finding that solution of compromise within the boundaries of God's love, that both agree in Christ without feelings being hurt because one feels their ideas, whatever have been overlooked or are not important.
I so believe there is always a solution that can be discovered, learned when Christ is the center of any relationship.
The hb should never be overpowering, a heart of authorianism because God has placed him head of and responsible within the family structure or marriage. That wife is a gift from God given to be his help mate in this life journey.
I totally agree with those who have stated living Jesus' example within any type of relationship earns the trust and respect rather then demanding their authority to be obeyed and followed.
The captain of the ship is given the authority to navigate but remains subject to the ship at all times. He shall also tend to the trim of sail by call, and command the use of rode. It is with humility and confidence that he shall navigate her responsibly through the passages and trials of the seas, but be internally reminded he is subject to the trim of her rudder.
I think you are stuck with an authoritarian mindset. I spent almost my entire professional career as a compliance officer---no authority to stop or change any actions by the companies I worked for. All I had was knowledge and persuasive skills.
Authoritarianism is the worst kind of family leadership.
As Confucius said, " An acceptable leader, the people fear, a better leader the people respect, the best leader, the people say, 'We did it ourselves.'"
My understanding from Jesus is that we should be the very best at our relationship with others. Did He not say, "Be perfect as my Father in Heaven is perfect." Outside of a close relationship with Jesus that is impossible. But in Him and through Him nothing is impossible.
But if one doesn't have Him at the center of their life, then authoritarianism is the way the world does it. "Christians" who want to slide into the world's way of living their lives will always look for scripture to justify failure to walk the narrow and difficult path that Jesus laid before us
I think you've assumed it that when someone is talking about being the head and enforcing rules this translates directly to a selfish authoritarian "dictator" type asking others to serve him.
In discipleship there is correction.. To have correction, there must be a wandering off of the correct path or rules.. rules ultimately ordained of God not man.
You can give someone the responsibility without the authority. You keep dodging that point.. because there is no answer.
A Christian head is to be serve God. He has the responsibility before God to raise a Godly home.. God has given him the authority to enforce the rules within the home to meet that responsibility.. As our heavenly Father guides, humble, is patient, is kind, etc (like the Man of the house should be).. He also does resort to correction to get us back on the right path if needed (as the man should as well). He also is to be respectful and treat the individual as a person..
As I think many people do, they automatically assume when someone is talking "head" it translates to a disrespectful authoritarian dictator.. That is not the case.
The captain of the ship is given the authority to navigate but remains subject to the ship at all times. He shall also tend to the trim of sail by call, and command the use of rode. It is with humility and confidence that he shall navigate her responsibly through the passages and trials of the seas, but be internally reminded he is subject to the trim of her rudder.
Women and children first.
...just sayin'
I think this says it well.. Thank you for posting.. A man with authority under authority..
I think you've assumed it that when someone is talking about being the head and enforcing rules this translates directly to a selfish authoritarian "dictator" type asking others to serve him.
In discipleship there is correction.. To have correction, there must be a wandering off of the correct path or rules.. rules ultimately ordained of God not man.
You can give someone the responsibility without the authority. You keep dodging that point.. because there is no answer.
A Christian head is to be serve God. He has the responsibility before God to raise a Godly home.. God has given him the authority to enforce the rules within the home to meet that responsibility.. As our heavenly Father guides, humble, is patient, is kind, etc (like the Man of the house should be).. He also does resort to correction to get us back on the right path if needed (as the man should as well). He also is to be respectful and treat the individual as a person..
As I think many people do, they automatically assume when someone is talking "head" it translates to a disrespectful authoritarian dictator.. That is not the case.
I'm picking out 2 important Christ-like characteristics in what you've said, those are being both a leader and a servant. Until true Christian men humble themselves to walk as Christ did they are unable to display his traits. Good post.
A real "leader" doesn't need to give commands---he leads in such a way that others want to follow. That's the whole essence of a witnessing life of discipleship. Over and over the weak demand authority, but over and over Jesus demands we live as examples.
Abraham Lincoln was president. Slavery was
not yet abolished. One day,
he went to the slavemarket and everyone was surprised to find him bidding on the beautiful young woman who was being auctioned as a slave.
After winning the bid, Abraham Lincoln walked away from the slavemarket and the woman followed. He turned around ordered that she be loosed from her chains and told her she was free to go. She looked at him incredulously. She asked him, "What does it mean to be free? can I say whatever I want to say?" Abraham Lincoln said "Yes. You can say whatever you want to say! She said, "Can I be whatever I want to be?"
Abraham Lincoln said, "Yes! You can be whatever you want to be!" She said, "Can I go wherever I want to go?"
Abraham Lincoln said, "Yes, you can go wherever you want to go!
She looked and the ground. Tears splashed the tops of her bare feet. She looked up at the man who had bought her freedom, sensing no one else could love her more, and said,
"Then, sir, I will go with YOU!"
When you realize that you are FREE... REALLY FREE....
It doesn't make you dive head-long into sin. It compels you to follow the one who broke your chains and loved you enough to tell you that you are FREE.
Last edited by Heartsong; 03-04-2014 at 08:48 PM..
Reason: color
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Lead by example, and you will have respect.
