Can't Wait To Move To Cincy Area! -- Suggestions, welcome!

[American Luxury]

Originally Posted by Travel Crazy

Many Meetups groups oriented towards purely social activities have a more middle-aged crowd. But, there are groups organized for specific business interests, hiking and other outdoor endeavors, for foreign language speakers, dog socializing, book clubs, photography, current event discussion and the list goes on and on. Those types of groups generally have a mix of ages.

Some are created to bring together certain ages and usually say so in the title of the group (you can otherwise tell the demographics of a group by looking at the photos of members).

It's a no-brainer way for a newcomer to get in the mix socially. A large social one with plenty in the age range of the OP is called: the Dirty Martini's.

Thanks for the info. I might have to check it out.

[SWOH]

Originally Posted by Travel Crazy

Perhaps SWOH is unfamiliar with Meetup.com. It has single-handedly changed the dynamic and prospects of creating new friendships when you move to a new location.

It also allows people to find others with interests they share in their current geography. Or for newly divorced, widowed or empty nesters to make new friends.

In a word, it's simply: brilliant.

Don't worry I've heard of it haha.

But here's the thing - NYC has it too.

And it has public transit. And the city requires walking to navigate it, forcing people to bump into and see each other. Throw in the fact that there's a significantly larger single / less committed transient population with more free time since they lack these commitments, and you can see why making friends in NYC is easier than in Cincy or any other metro outside the top ~10 largest in the US.

But it's certainly not impossible. You're right, meetup.com seems like a great way to go ( I've never done one personally, but if I was in her shoes I certainly would).

[ProkNo5]

One caution I feel prudent to give in this situation is that the culture of the suburbs varies greatly depending on how far out you get and which direction you go. It has something to do with the hills creating more independent communities, and something to do with being at the border between the Midwest, Northeast, and South. You'll get vastly different experiences living in Ohio vs Kentucky vs Indiana or inside the City, inside 275, or outside Hamilton County. It's part of what makes Cincinnati the great melting pot that it is, and while I prefer life in the center of the City, I wouldn't day that anywhere else in the metro is better or worse, just different.

It's also a difference of scale. You're getting responses like Miami Twp. and Mariemont. Comparing Cincinnati's metro size to NYC, that's like comparing the Poconos to the Hamptons. Queens is to Manhattan what Covington is to Downtown Cincinnati. Just keep in mind that you're getting a very different experience in Cincy. It might be helpful to us for you to describe the amenities or culture you're looking for in your idea of a suburb.

My advice is to come back and hang out in the neighborhood business district or local bar or chili parlor in each of the neighborhoods you're looking at to get a feel for the people.

[Travel Crazy]

Originally Posted by SWOH

But here's the thing - NYC has it too.

And it has public transit. And the city requires walking to navigate it, forcing people to bump into and see each other. Throw in the fact that there's a significantly larger single / less committed transient population with more free time since they lack these commitments, and you can see why making friends in NYC is easier than in Cincy or any other metro outside the top ~10 largest in the US.

Unless you're speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that it's not exactly like that. I spent a decade in Manhattan many years back and only once in a blue moon would you run into a friend on the street or grocery in your neighborhood.

And given the size of the city, if you lived on the upper East Side and had a friend that lived in Greenwich Village, upper West Side, Brooklyn, etc --- you'd see them only 2 or 3 times a year. Seriously. People tend to work a lot in NYC and then have commutes, etc. They very often don't feel like going a fair distance at night or on weekends to see even actual friends. It's like that in most very large metro's.....Atlanta, Los Angeles, etc.

Plus NYers are somewhat stand-offish in general; it's just big city culture, it seems. The friendship thing is not a simple deal anywhere, I think. But, Meetup gets you halfway there by introducing you to people with a shared interest and whom you may not otherwise meet. It rolls the social ball....

[SWOH]

I am not speaking from personal experience so I can see how what you described would be the case.

I had a cousin that lived in Harlem for a number of years. She had a tough time making friends just because her schedule was so hectic. Also the high cost of living demolished a lot of her discretionary spending budget.

But yes, I was figuring that the proximity to a lot of different people would make it easier to meet new people. If you're out here in the suburbs, you'll be more removed from people in general, and even small things like commute time will be absorbed into isolation in a car rather than a communal street environment.

Regardless, if she comes out here she should use Meetup and I'd still recommend a more social apt complex / environment. I live in one myself in suburbia and I'm enjoying it quite a bit, even though I haven't had a good chance to meet the neighbors yet.

[Travel Crazy]

Originally Posted by SWOH

I'd still recommend a more social apt complex / environment. I live in one myself in suburbia and I'm enjoying it quite a bit,

Definitely agree with that approach too. She may as well stack the deck in her favor on all fronts!

[ABQConvict]

Originally Posted by SWOH

But yes, I was figuring that the proximity to a lot of different people would make it easier to meet new people. If you're out here in the suburbs, you'll be more removed from people in general, and even small things like commute time will be absorbed into isolation in a car rather than a communal street environment.

The thing that makes NYC a slight bit more... sociable, is that a huge proportion of its residents are from fractured social groups, which is to say they are transplants, immigrants, originally from a distant part of the metro than where they are currently living, etc. and thus are open to meeting new people.

Contrarily, many Cincinnatians are still in social groups that include their (often) extended families and childhood/high school friends.

That said, I moved to Butler County, which is just as provincial, if not way more, than Cincinnati and even I was able to make friends by virtue of concentrating on meeting people with shared special interests which is something that apparently Meetup facilitates (though I have never used it).

I would say the main thing to consider about breaking into a social life in Cincinnati is not that there aren't any social scenes willing to let you in, but that there are some (a lot) of social groups in which you will always be an outsider or newcomer.

tl;dr Meetup sounds like a good idea.

[jneeni]

All --

I'm SO sorry! City-Data didn't alert me to any new messages on the thread so I just assumed it was DOA!

I'm definitely writing down all these suggestions. This might seem a little jumbled, but I want to address what inquiries I noticed.

FWIW - I'm good with a small group of friends. I'm more of a solitary person and I keep my own company very nicely. I don't have anyone in the area that I know (I'm honestly looking forward to a completely clean start), and I fully intend to join a few Meetups in the area. I have one close friend in Indianapolis if anything hits the fan, so to speak, but other than that, I'd be 100% solo!

Interestingly enough, despite how easy it may seem to make friends in NYC, it's really not. Most people are too busy working to expand much beyond their core group of friends. I've done Meetups here and nothing has panned out because people generally just don't bother with them much.

Also, I'm guessing from what I'm reading here that I should be leaning more towards an area just-outside-the-city... I grew up in the suburbs of Long Island and even that was a little too congested for me, at times... but then, I imagine Long Island is far, far more densely populated than any of Cincy's suburbs. Hyde Park is sounding like it might be what I'm looking for - a nice middle-ground.

I fully intend to visit Cincinnati a couple more times to check out the neighborhoods you guys have mentioned -- and rent a car this time so I can drive around a while on my own time. I'm definitely sold on the city and uprooting my life (for better or worse!), so now it's just a matter of figuring out where the heck I want to live!

Thank you everyone!