Forgotten "Real World" cities - who should be next? (Fill in the city subplots) (living, best)
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I was moderately surprised to find out that MTV's "Real World" series is still active - America has largely been on a downward arc since the early 1990s, which is not coincidentally when this show debuted. Still blending a pinch of civic boosterism with a thick paste of broadcast stupidity, I was also surprised to find that since the 1990s, certain cities have been recast as locations (along with truly "real" places like Key West, Cancun and the USVI).
Amazingly, some of the loudest and proudest people on this site have not had their precious locales represented in 21 years of "Real World" - and I know it must hurt. I felt that maybe we could nominate some of these forgotten cities and add some likely subplots as well. Please bear in mind that this is strictly tounge-in-cheek, and we simply are looking to expose and root out the uninformed stereotypes that pervade CD forums at times. Allow me to start with a few:
Real World St. Louis: Residents of a 19th century house spend their time marketing a sad American beer. They encounter crime. And bad weather. And depression. And intense boredom. They eventually move to Florida or Arizona.
Real World Pittsburgh: The young kids living in an early 20th century house spend most of their time applying lipstick to a once-important pig, but are told that the pig will be great again soon. The rest of the time is spent debasing the important and beautiful things in life by relating them to the Steelers. They eventually move to Florida or Arizona.
Real World Tampa: Living in a late 1970s beach rental near a fetid bayside, the residents get jobs removing barbed-wire tattoos from the arms of an aging "dancer" population. An alternate plot revolves around how large an SUV you can purchase on an annual stipend of $21,000
Real World Dallas: In an expansive McMansion, the residents all work at Old Navy, lease BMWs and spend every single day eating at chain restaurants then going to vintage 2004-era "ultra lounges". In their spare time, they persecute anyone who went to a top-20 college.
Real World Phoenix: Since they can't find a job that involves mortgage origination or methamphetamine sales, the entire series is filmed on location in San Diego, where they do lots of jaeger bombs, vomit in public, and ruin the nightlife of a fair city.
Real World Detroit: The contestants live in a 5,000 sq ft. house they buy for $1. After three weeks, they fight their way out and flee to Windsor, Canada in the gutsiest, most grueling escape since the Anabasis. Real Emmy potential here.
Real World Salt Lake City: The contenstants live in a safe, friendly neighborhood, play lots of board games and enjoy ice-cream floats. Five children are born before the series ends.
Real World San Antonio: The contestants gain a collective 988 lbs in just 4 months. They all have the same job - greeting people arriving at the airport with "welcome to America's 7th biggest city" chants. Tensions flare when somebody decides to tuck their shirt in. Five children are born before the series ends.
Real World Pittsburgh: The young kids living in an early 20th century house spend most of their time applying lipstick to a once-important pig, but are told that the pig will be great again soon. The rest of the time is spent debasing the important and beautiful things in life by relating them to the Steelers. They eventually move to Florida or Arizona.
Are you implying that this isn't beautiful?
I took this picture myself. They had this display in the "Things That Can't Be Found In Other Cities" section of the Heinz Pittsburgh Regional History Center.
By the way, what the Real World crew was actually doing in Pittsburgh was developing a new rating system for restaurants and hotels to compete with AAA and Forbes, but this rating system uses "trophies" instead of stars or diamonds, and it tops out at six instead of five. In fact, the "Six Trophy" designation can only be applied to one restaurant and one hotel per continent, and it denotes the best of the best. It's such an honor that restaurants and hotels that later revert back to Five Trophy status refer to themselves as "former" Six Trophy establishments to separate themselves from the other Five Trophy establishments that have never earned Six Trophy designations.
Real World Portland: 7 women and women only that live in treehouse promoting medical marijuana expansion, spotted owl awareness, and make a limited income with some working at a local sperm bank and others giving tatoos using environmentally safe ink.
Last edited by Champ le monstre du lac; 02-20-2013 at 08:47 PM..
I think they have just about run out of interesting American cities (unless they wanna keep going to the same places for the second, third and fourth time). But there are still a few great English-speaking cities left outside of the US that could make for a great setting:
Toronto
Montreal (mostly French, but good enough)
Vancouver
Melbourne
Brisbane/Gold Coast
Dublin
Edinburgh
Then again with sh*t for brains that they've got in that production team they would rather go to places like Key West and Cancun.
I took this picture myself. They had this display in the "Things That Can't Be Found In Other Cities" section of the Heinz Pittsburgh Regional History Center.
Where's Ben Roethlisberger in that picture? I don't think many cities have quarterbacks that are rapists either. Pittsburgh needs to add him to the hall man and pronto.
Real World Portland: 7 women and women only that live in treehouse promoting medical marijuana expansion, spotted owl awareness, and make a limited income with some working at a local sperm bank and others giving tatoos using environmentally safe ink.
funnier would be to have jersey shore in portland.
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