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I don't know if I'm qualified to answer this question because I only been to Mesa, Scottsdale and Oakland. Out of those three, I would choose Scottsdale. Oakland, by itself, is an amazing city. What ruins that city are the people there. It's a high crime area. However, Scottsdale has that "rich man" vibe but has a lower COL than Oakland.
I would vote for Bethesda, MD but it is not on this list. I am always very impressed with the transit connectivity, mix of uses and diversity of housing stock when I visit Bethesda. I think it really is an amazing suburban/urban model and really has more character and charm than Arlington, VA
FYI, in reality Norfolk is the principal city of Coastal Virginia/Hampton Roads. Virginia Beach is actually the satellite.
Virginia Beach's enormous land area thwarts its neighbors' populations in an apples to oranges comparison kind of way. I agree; Norfolk is the main city.
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