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More excuses. Married woman with kids started entering the workforce in droves in the 70s, and it continued into the 80s and 90s.
Many today can't focus on the task at hand, put down your Smartphone. Your texts and FB updates can wait.
Most today who are "overwhelmed" bring it on themselves due to lack of planning and unable to concentrate on what is happening around them, so entranced with that device in their hand.
So when leebeemi posted this upthread, you're going to tell her that she's making excuses and had her nose stuck in her phone?
Quote:
Originally Posted by leebeemi
Shortly after my 2nd was born, this almost happened to me. I am a GOOD parent. They are in their teens now, and happy, healthy, smart, polite, funny, wonderful kids. But one day I was overtired or overwhelmed or over-something, and my brain clicked off on my morning drive. I loaded them in the car, backed out of my driveway, and sort of came to as I was parking my car at work. I remember being a little confused, and just as I was going to get out of the car, something reminded me they were there. I was stunned. I almost left them. I forgot they were there. I drove right past my daycare. It was the worst thing that's ever happened to me, that feeling that I almost left them there. It isn't something that happened because I was a bad parent, or because I was on drugs, or because of anything--it just happened. I can't explain it, because I don't understand it. I hear the stories from parents where this was a legitimate accident and my heart breaks for them. I can't judge them and call them monsters. I can only feel sorry for their heartbreaking losses.
I don't buy a single case of the "I forgot the kid was in the car". BS. Every time they have video evidence of one of these forgetfulness episodes, the parent always goes to the car one or more times to "get something". They just don't ever notice their dying/dead kid in the car? How convenient. 99%+ of these forgetfulness episodes are murder.
On the off chance they honestly did "forget", they still get no sympathy from me as they have proven they are unfit to be a member of society by forgetting about their own offspring.
More excuses. Married woman with kids started entering the workforce in droves in the 70s, and it continued into the 80s and 90s.
Many today can't focus on the task at hand, put down your Smartphone. Your texts and FB updates can wait.
Most today who are "overwhelmed" bring it on themselves due to lack of planning and unable to concentrate on what is happening around them, so entranced with that device in their hand.
An observation. Growing up in the 60-70, in my world few women worked, most that did were not mothers or were divorced. Taking your child to a daycare facility was rare. Most women did not enter the workforce until their children were in kindergarten or first grade because kindergarten was half days. And most worked only part time.
Call our busy lifestyles today an excuse but it is our reality.
I agree we as a society spend too much time engrossed in our devices and IMO its a problem we need to work on. Our busy lives and work requirements are none the less an issue that can lead to this very type of tragedy.
On the Kids and Cars website, they have stories of families who have lost a child to heatstroke and one of the couples comes right out and says that part of the problem is the speed of life for two-career families...
Quote:
And finally, I agree that both mothers and fathers should please slow down. The pressures of having a two-career family were very challenging to us. We could have met them, but we also should have scaled back our expectations of what we could accomplish in our careers during our child’s first years. Babies are only young once, and by slowing down other aspects of your life you can devote more concentrated attention to your families.
If you read more into their story, you see how their tragedy happened and how their jobs were involved.
I wasn't replying specifically to this incident, but the situation in general of parents forgetting their kids in cars. Take from it what you will. Your post was rude and it's not the first time but it will be the last time for me. My ignore list is getting longer and longer.
Love it. You write unkind, judgmental words and then when you get the expected reaction, it's me being rude. Ah, the games people play. You can put me on ignore, but someone else will come along and call you on your dark heart and then you will put him or her on ignore...
When reading the stories it's often the same thing...parents trying to do too much. Too many jobs, activities, daycares, driving here driving there. Switching off. Not enough sleep.
Whenever you read the stories, one wonders why were the parents trying to juggle all that? Cell phones aren't helping either.
And Type A personalities seem to be more prone to this
I think that's really it. Too many things going on at once. I never forgot my kid, but then again "daycare" was my parents, and I left my car there and caught a train. They would've noticed if I didn't take the baby in.
But, I've run around in the morning, got my lunch out of the fridge and put it in the tote, put my shoes on, gone to the kitchen to make sure I unplugged the coffee pot...and stared dumbfounded at my lunch sitting on the counter because I was sure I remembered putting it in the tote bag. There's too much to remember, and I was sleep deprived for years when working full time. It takes a toll.
I think that's really it. Too many things going on at once. I never forgot my kid, but then again "daycare" was my parents, and I left my car there and caught a train. They would've noticed if I didn't take the baby in.
But, I've run around in the morning, got my lunch out of the fridge and put it in the tote, put my shoes on, gone to the kitchen to make sure I unplugged the coffee pot...and stared dumbfounded at my lunch sitting on the counter because I was sure I remembered putting it in the tote bag. There's too much to remember, and I was sleep deprived for years when working full time. It takes a toll.
It might be more of an issue for those that are career focused. I have always been kid focused. I often sit at work and do things for the kids, plan their schedules, schedule appointments, sign them up for sports and extra curricular activities, search for fun places we can visit.
It might be more of an issue for those that are career focused. I have always been kid focused. I often sit at work and do things for the kids, plan their schedules, schedule appointments, sign them up for sports and extra curricular activities, search for fun places we can visit.
I understand what you are saying. But it's also entirely possibly that a parent who left their child in a car could go to work, fully convinced that s/he had dropped the child off at daycare or that they were with the other parent...and sit there planning what they were going to do with the child on the weekend. Those things are not mutually exclusive.
I understand what you are saying. But it's also entirely possibly that a parent who left their child in a car could go to work, fully convinced that s/he had dropped the child off at daycare or that they were with the other parent...and sit there planning what they were going to do with the child on the weekend. Those things are not mutually exclusive.
True. I think very few mothers of small children are more "career focused" than "kid focused". The so-called career is far more often a means to pay the bills and live somewhere safe with good schools.
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