'Dine-and-dash' dater could face up to 13 years in prison

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by budlight

8 times, with 8 different guys? Do you have a link to this woman? I would like to read about that story as well. Shame on her!!!

Over a period of two years? I don't know women personally who have done that, that many times, but I think it's highly possible.

No one even bats an eye, and I'd bet the restaurant was unaware that it happens when it does - that women sneak away. The man just pays, is embarrassed, finishes and leaves.

The dining bills in this story were a little less than $100 per evening, what you'd expect to pay for a kind of upscale meal out with a couple drinks.

It's not like he racked up 10 grand on a credit card of hers and skipped town.

Many of the women expressed that they were surprised, as good looking as he was, that he was interested in her. First clue.

He's a jerk, for sure, but I think this is a bit of an overreaction.

[ocnjgirl]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

I understand what you're saying, but have you ever heard a woman arrested for texting a friend and asking to be picked up outside the restaurant, and then secretly taking off in the middle of the evening?

The difference here is a very, very thin line.

I don't think it's a thin line at all. In your example, no money was stolen from a victim, it's just a rotten friend. This man deliberately and habitually deceives women into buying him something. Theft by deception is a crime under the law. Again I feel like you're thinking this was a date. It was never a date, he had no intention of ever seeing any of these women again.


A better example would be a friend who promised to install a floor for you, asked you for money for materials, then took off with it.

[ocnjgirl]

Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla

If the women covered the check for their dates, the restaurant isn't out money. He wasn't necessarily trying to swindle the restaurant, just leave his date stuck with the bill.

I don't think he should get 13 years. Personally as a woman, I often paid my own way on dates. I don't see any reason not to.

If a woman walked out on her date at the restaurant, leaving him stuck with the bill, there would be no legal issue. So why can't a man do the same thing?

If she did this to multiple people, took off out the back door after inviting them out to dinner and making them believe she wanted to date them, sure she would. The fact he does it habitually and to multiple women is why he was arrested. He is committing theft by deception, I don't see what's hard to understand about that. He's finishing his dinner, then saying "I'll be right back, need to use the restroom" then running off.


I feel like people think he truly wanted to go on a date with these women, and in the end didn't like them so he left. That is not the case, he is doing all this simply to get dinner paid for him, perhaps some twisted revenge on women, but he was never interested in dating IMO.

[Nov3]

Hoodwinked!

Lure em in and then leave em flabbergasted.

Since it's a 'could' face, he'll get off with an English muffin and a slap on the hand at best.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by ocnjgirl

I don't think it's a thin line at all. In your example, no money was stolen from a victim, it's just a rotten friend. This man deliberately and habitually deceives women into buying him something. Theft by deception is a crime under the law. Again I feel like you're thinking this was a date. It was never a date, he had no intention of ever seeing any of these women again.


A better example would be a friend who promised to install a floor for you, asked you for money for materials, then took off with it.

In my example, it was a woman who agreed to go out with a man, ordered expensive food, and 2/3 of the way through the evening, texted a friend to come pick her up outside the restaurant and then she snuck out.

I really don't see how this is different - really at all - from what this man did.

[Metlakatla]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

In my example, it was a woman who agreed to go out with a man, ordered expensive food, and 2/3 of the way through the evening, texted a friend to come pick her up outside the restaurant and then she snuck out.

I really don't see how this is different - really at all - from what this man did.

Isn't this scenario usually reserved for those times when her creepometer is sending heavy signals?

I don't see how it's the same at all.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by Metlakatla

Isn't this scenario usually reserved for those times when her creepometer is sending heavy signals?

I don't see how it's the same at all.

That's kind of a different thing, if she's feeling a little threatened.

I'm talking about a woman who purposely orders the most expensive item on the menu, and then leaves. Or more typically, stays so she can take home all the leftovers but never intends to see him again, and never did in the first place.

That's common, IMHO.

[ocnjgirl]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

In my example, it was a woman who agreed to go out with a man, ordered expensive food, and 2/3 of the way through the evening, texted a friend to come pick her up outside the restaurant and then she snuck out.

I really don't see how this is different - really at all - from what this man did.

The difference is, she went in the date with true intentions, she hoped to come out of date with a guy she liked. She didn’t trick him into going in date knowing ahead of time she only wanted a meal. Second difference is it was a one-off. As I said, the fact this man did this on a consistent basis to multiple women changes intent, which does count when weighing whether to charge someone with a crime.

The biggest difference between your story and the story however, is that the men in your story never told the police. The women in this case did. Perhaps if the men in that case did go to the cops she would be arrested. You cant simply say it’s a double standard though when the police only knew about this man and not your lady friend.

To be sure, I think what that lady did was rotten, but again it is intent and pattern of doing this repeatedly that made this different and allowed legal standard for theft by deception to be met.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by ocnjgirl

The difference is, she went in the date with true intentions, she hoped to come out of date with a guy she liked. She didn’t trick him into going in date knowing ahead of time she only wanted a meal. Second difference is it was a one-off. As I said, the fact this man did this on a consistent basis to multiple women changes intent, which does count when weighing whether to charge someone with a crime.

To be sure, I think what that lady did was rotten, but again it is intent and pattern of doing this repeatedly that made this different.

Not always, is what I'm saying. There are plenty of girls who purposely go out on dates with guys who are under their "league" just to take them for an expensive meal, and have no intention at all of having anything to do with them.

A woman who goes on a date with the thought that she might like him and then turns out she doesn't, at all is a different thing.

[ocnjgirl]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

That's kind of a different thing, if she's feeling a little threatened.

I'm talking about a woman who purposely orders the most expensive item on the menu, and then leaves. Or more typically, stays so she can take home all the leftovers but never intends to see him again, and never did in the first place.

That's common, IMHO.

I actually don’t think it’s common at all. I think the vast majority of women go on first dates hoping for a love connection.