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Yes, her rental office should enforce existent rules of conduct. Yes, calling the police is an option. However to suggest that speaking to the neighbor directly and working something out is nonsense, is, well, nonsense. In this day and age and in a (overall) violent city like Dallas where confrontations can and do end in tragedy, taking an aggressive stand over the volume of a stereo is in my opinion needlessly foolish and risky. Much of the self-defense and firearms training I've taken over the years centers primarily on conflict avoidance, and understanding where and when to give a little and where to hold your ground. To advise the OP that this is a, "I'm sick and tired and not gonna take it anymore" moment when it is nothing more than a nuisance is foolish to say the least. Neither you or I know enough about the stereo playing neighbor to know if the person is stupid, inconsiderate, unaware, willing to turn it down or unwilling to turn it down. We don't know if the person is mentally unbalanced, sociopathic, on narcotics, armed, a gang member, or any combination of the above.
So in my humble opinion, the best path is to take a very conservative approach and do not escalate the situation. YMMV and it's up to Lady Rogers to decide how she should handle it.
I would never appoach a neighbor in an aggressive, in your face, demanding manner. The man looks decent enough, I think he probably just doesn't realize how much the sound carries.
I already sent an email to my leasing office earlier today, and I still plan on talking with him myself.
What did tick me off, is when I turned on my own stereo to mask his, and he immediately turned his up LOUD. Mine was just at normal listening level. That isn't the norm though, so I let is slide - especially since it was New Year's Eve.
Nonsense. Anyone old enough to live in an apartment is old enough to know they shouldn't be blasting their stereo in multifamily housing. Do that in your own home or your car, not in an apartment. This is one of those basic common sense/mutual respect things that every apartment dweller should know; therefore, if they aren't following it, they're either a complete moron or have already demonstrated their disrespect toward you by not following the unwritten rules of apartment living. As a long-time apartment renter, it's my experience that talking will probably not do any good at all. These types could care less that they're bothering you.
Here's what to do: call your leasing office first. Give them the unit number of the offender, and make sure they understand you won't tolerate that. It's their responsibility to enforce community rules, not yours. Be firm about that point. Then, give it a couple of days to play out. If that doesn't work, or if you have a repeat of the "everything vibrating" scenario, call the cops (be sure to call the non-emergency number for your city). You can make your complaint anonymously, and stereo-jerk will never know it was you; if it's as loud as you say, everyone in your building would have a legitimate complaint.
Whatever you do, don't be wishy washy or compromise. There is NO compromise for that situation... only various degrees to which you get screwed by some ******* with too much stereo and not enough brains.
I won't be wishy washy at all, and no compromise either....the volume is WAY too loud for an apartment complex. I'm not looking to make this a huge battle either, just trying to get some peace back.
Unless she lives in the ghetto, it's not likely that her neighbor is a violent gangbanger. I think she should complain to the landlord, and if she doesn't get satisfaction she should pursue legal options that may include breaking her lease because she is unable to enjoy the peace and quiet to which she is legally entitled under Texas law. She should also document everything.
Stereo wars, on the other hand, are immature and counterproductive....especially if the resident can truthfully claim that he's not the only one making a lot of noise. Just because he's doing it doesn't give you the right to do it; you should be mindful of the other people in your building and what kind of misery that kind of useless response may be causing for them. If you're making them miserable with your noise (particularly if they can't hear or can muffle the noise that's bothering you) then you're no better than he is.
ND, as you know I live in the North Dallas neighborhood you grew up in, which is considered a nice part of town. Even here there is gang graffiti by "Northside Vagos 14" on variousl alley walls and such. I don't know if they are posers and punks or if they are for real, but you never know. I never assume anything about neighbors based only on the neighborhood we live in. My point about going in like a tough guy is you really don't know who neighbors/strangers are with regards to getting in confrontations. Maybe being a gang member is a reach, but you don't know if your neighbor is on drugs, is mentally imbalanced, etc. Confrontations with strangers should generally be avoided in most situations even if it means compromising or giving in a little. If it is a chronic situation where the neighbor tells LadyRogers to go to h**l and cranks the stereo 24/7,that is one thing. But the situation as described calls for restraint and patience. As someone who is legally armed 24/7 and can win just about any altercation I could get in, I avoid them at all costs. I have nothing to prove and trying to make a point like that other poster counseled is a recipe for trouble.
Of course she should complain to the landlord and she should also have a converation with the neighbor. But Lady Rogers, I advise not to go in demanding "peace and quiet or else" and not be willing to compromise by letting the neighbor enjoy his music at an agreed upon level. Leave your ego out of it. Find a way to meet in the middle that you can live with. By demanding your way or the highway you may win the battle of the stero volume, but having a feud with a neighbor means you have lost the war - you won't feel safe in your own home. The police exist only to pick up bodies and write reports. Don't kid yourself that threats of calling police carries much sway.
Regardless, I bet the person really doesn't know they are being such a nusiance and hopefully you will report back that they were agreeable to just turning it down.
Unless she lives in the ghetto, it's not likely that her neighbor is a violent gangbanger. I think she should complain to the landlord, and if she doesn't get satisfaction she should pursue legal options that may include breaking her lease because she is unable to enjoy the peace and quiet to which she is legally entitled under Texas law. She should also document everything.
Stereo wars, on the other hand, are immature and counterproductive....especially if the resident can truthfully claim that he's not the only one making a lot of noise. Just because he's doing it doesn't give you the right to do it; you should be mindful of the other people in your building and what kind of misery that kind of useless response may be causing for them. If you're making them miserable with your noise (particularly if they can't hear or can muffle the noise that's bothering you) then you're no better than he is.
Heavens no, I don't live in a ghetto. This is a very nice complex in north Plano.
I didn't turn my stereo up real high when I heard his, it was at normal listening level, but I see what you mean. If he thinks mine is too loud at times, he wouldn't be as receptive. That's why I want to talk to him face to face - because if mine is too loud, I want to know that too.
The surround system I'm using (which also plays CDs), doesn't have a big floor woofer like my other one does, which is why I didn't use the other one in an apartment - I know it would be a nusance even on low volume.
It's all about being considerate neighbors as far as I'm concerned.
Yes, her rental office should enforce existent rules of conduct. Yes, calling the police is an option. However to suggest that speaking to the neighbor directly and working something out is nonsense, is, well, nonsense. In this day and age and in a (overall) violent city like Dallas where confrontations can and do end in tragedy, taking an aggressive stand over the volume of a stereo is in my opinion needlessly foolish and risky. Much of the self-defense and firearms training I've taken over the years centers primarily on conflict avoidance, and understanding where and when to give a little and where to hold your ground. To advise the OP that this is a, "I'm sick and tired and not gonna take it anymore" moment when it is nothing more than a nuisance is foolish to say the least. Neither you or I know enough about the stereo playing neighbor to know if the person is stupid, inconsiderate, unaware, willing to turn it down or unwilling to turn it down. We don't know if the person is mentally unbalanced, sociopathic, on narcotics, armed, a gang member, or any combination of the above.
So in my humble opinion, the best path is to take a very conservative approach and do not escalate the situation. YMMV and it's up to Lady Rogers to decide how she should handle it.
Reading. Comprehension. My entire point was to call someone who's trained in and responsible for enforcing rules, not to do it yourself as you first advised, and sure as hell not to go over there half-cocked. Furthermore, your posts are contradictory: with all those crazies, why in God's name would you try to go ask them to turn down their stereo? They'd probably just blow you away with a shotgun blast through the door at this hypothetical psycho apartment complex you've described.
People who blast stereos have already demonstrated that they are incapable of grasping simple concepts such as "don't play your music too loud." I find it unlikely that they're suddenly going to master other simple concepts such as "take the advice of my friendly neighbor lady and turn down my music before I get in trouble." Call for backup... get the leasing office or the cops involved, do not speak to the offending party about the problem AT ALL, and let the professionals sort it out. A warning from the leasing office or the boys in blue will carry a hell of a lot more weight with these types of people than a neighbor asking politely.
EDIT: this guy's in his 30's and he's listening to his stereo so loud it vibrates your apartment? Yeah, doesn't sound like he's too swift there. Also, just for clarification: the OP clearly described the situation as if stereo guy was playing his music at a completely obnoxious volume for an extended period. Subsequent posts have hinted that it may have been that way for only a short time, and that the main problem is a far more common issue in apartments where the volume is loud but not obnoxious and the guy doesn't realize how far it carries. THAT doesn't require a response from the police SWAT team, and I'm not advocating that. A brief conversation might solve your problem there. But if he's "thumping BIG TIME, and everything in [your] home [is] vibrating," that's almost certainly obnoxiously loud, and you should get others involved at that point.
Last edited by ntmg05; 01-01-2008 at 09:15 PM..
Reason: clarification
Reading. Comprehension. My entire point was to call someone who's trained in and responsible for enforcing rules, not to do it yourself as you first advised, and sure as hell not to go over there half-cocked. Furthermore, your posts are contradictory: with all those crazies, why in God's name would you try to go ask them to turn down their stereo? They'd probably just blow you away with a shotgun blast through the door at this hypothetical psycho apartment complex you've described.
People who blast stereos have already demonstrated that they are incapable of grasping simple concepts such as "don't play your music too loud." I find it unlikely that they're suddenly going to master other simple concepts such as "take the advice of my friendly neighbor lady and turn down my music before I get in trouble." Call for backup... get the leasing office or the cops involved, do not speak to the offending party AT ALL, and let the professionals sort it out. A warning from the leasing office or the boys in blue will carry a hell of a lot more weight with these types of people than a neighbor asking politely.
I appreciate that you are trying to be condescending in order to make your point, but really, give it a rest. There is no need for it. It's my opinion that people will react much more strongly when someone calls the landlord and cops without speaking to them first rather than a knock on the door with a polite request to turn it down before escalating the situation. Anyways, I've said my peace in this thread and am done. Good luck all, be safe and happy New Year!
ND, as you know I live in the North Dallas neighborhood you grew up in, which is considered a nice part of town. Even here there is gang graffiti by "Northside Vagos 14" on variousl alley walls and such.
Eh....never have seen that in the actual neighborhood I grew up in. You said once that the Preston and Beltline Tom Thumb was near to you; that's not the 'hood I grew up in, that's a few miles north of it.
I have found when trying to deal with people over issues like this, it only starts wars. You don't really know him, I would call the police and let them handle it. If you knew him well enough to tell him it is too loud, that is one thing. You don't know him and you don't know if he is someone with whom can understand... Just call the police and have them deal with it.
Eh....never have seen that in the actual neighborhood I grew up in. You said once that the Preston and Beltline Tom Thumb was near to you; that's not the 'hood I grew up in, that's a few miles north of it.
Nope, I work over there. I live in Melshire/McShann Estates area.
Nope, I work over there. I live in Melshire/McShann Estates area.
McShann is right next to Harvest Hill which has a lot of low-income housing, so I wouldn't be surprised to see it there. I'm surprised they haven't put up a big wall with razor wire to be honest; those apartments are naaaaaaaaaasty. I've yet to see anything like that on the other side of Walker.
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