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OP, I can't speak to whether or not you've been subject to racism because I haven't lived your life or your present situation. However, at the minimum you've been treated rudely by fellow parents and unprofessionally by your teacher. I would address the former by 'killing them with kindness' and the latter with the Principal. Good luck- and like I said, look into independent schools. Your diversity is a gift to them and they would pay dearly for it, in terms of financial aid (if needed). Just a thought.
This is just me, but you seem to be coming across as someone who is actively looking for racism. You seem to be the angry person who takes offense at any thing and label it as racism whether it is or isn't. If you walk into this situation with a huge chip on your shoulder then that attitude will come across chrystal clear and push people away.
Then you don't get my post at all. If you knew me, you would know what a ridiclous statment that was. At my daughter's old school it was only 8% black. People were nice. Everyone was respectful of others. I looked forward to going to the new school. I am of mixed race. I have white, black, indian, and asian people in my family. I have looked over so much at this school. I tried to explain it all away. I wanted it to just be lack of organization, or just little misunderstandings. I live in a prodominatly white area. I've never had the problems like I am experiencing at this school.
I've experience little bits of racism here and there in my personal life. I've never had to deal with so much in one place. And at a school! Other people have made the same comments. I guess we all just have a big united chip on our shoulders.
Then you don't get my post at all. If you knew me, you would know what a ridiclous statment that was. At my daughter's old school it was only 8% black. People were nice. Everyone was respectful of others. I looked forward to going to the new school. I am of mixed race. I have white, black, indian, and asian people in my family. I have looked over so much at this school. I tried to explain it all away. I wanted it to just be lack of organization, or just little misunderstandings. I live in a prodominatly white area. I've never had the problems like I am experiencing at this school.
I've experience little bits of racism here and there in my personal life. I've never had to deal with so much in one place. And at a school! Other people have made the same comments. I guess we all just have a big united chip on our shoulders.
So I'm curious: what do you think is the reason for the difference between the two schools?
I've gotten the same treatment from other mothers, because I'm disabled and older than most of them. I've learned the best course is to stay clear for my kids sake. If I attended meetings, parties, etc, I was shunned, and then something would always happen involving my kids the next day. Seems out of sight, out of mind.
Its sad, but I've found it better simply not to show up for PTA, parten/teacher night, parties, etc. The less I'm around, the less my kids are picked on by the teachers. That's just how it works out for me.
Also, I've learned to ALWAYS keep copies of all homework and any other correspondence with the school. My kids were "missing" homework, too, until I sent in copies, then the teachers stopped "losing" it.
Teachers and other parents can be petty, don't ever forget that. They're not above reproach, and yes, they can and will take out their prejudices on an innocent kid. Makes an easy target!
Even cuter situation today. We had a big lunch in the classroom. Everyone was suppose to bring a dish. I found out from my daughter. I still didn't get an email. Of course again I was the only black there. No problem. I'm often in that situation where I live. Just like the other functions I've been too, I was ignored, again. Also, no problem. I tried to join in a few conversations. No luck. Again, no problem. I was there for my daughter. After everything was done, I was helping to clean up. I gathered up my dish (pasta salad). Two ladies approached me to ask what I wanted them to do with the watermelon I brought. They said it was a lot left no one wanted any. First, I didn't bring watermelon. Second, why assume I did. I know, I'm being paranoid. I politely explained the watermelon was not mine and before you ask neither was the fried chicken. I told them the pasta salad, which was all gone, was my dish. They looked at each other and apologized. They began to explain with the words "we assumed". I just smiled and said I know, that's the problem. An Asian woman(not that it matters) brought the watermelon. She was almost too embarrassed to collect it. I finished cleaning. Kissed my daughter and went home.
The good news is when I got home, I had three emails. Two from other parents in the room still apologizing for their ignorance. One inviting me to the next function! I can't wait! I'm hopeful that it will be better.
That would be funny if it weren't so sad!
I never contribute dishes to parties, no one eats it and its pointedly handed back to me. It really hurt my kids to see their favorite dishes shunned, along with their mother. Those parties just aren't for us. Those mothers can be such b****es!
The curriculum is the same. It's still the same school district. I'm a little confused with what that has to do with us being treated so badly and her work magically reappearing from nowhere. I never said she had problems with school work. She still makes A's on test. The teacher lost her work on purpose. That was the point. Since my threat, her work has not vanished into thin air anymore. She still has straight A's.
"It's still the same school district." has nothing to how one teacher teaches and grades from another...
"The teacher lost her work on purpose." prove it!
I think YOU are the problem.... all of a sudden your little darling is no longer the little darling in the new school and you don't like it..so you choose to turn it into a race issue...
I live in Georgia. I am very concerned about what it might do to her. I don't want it to make her angry and bitter. We've always had a good mixture of friends, but these are things that could make her feel very different about white people. I really hope that everything settles down. After a few parents went to the superintendents office, the principal put out a letter addressing the "untruths" that are being spread around the school. He let parents know that there hasn't been any incidents in the school. He basically tried to calm things. I'm hopeful.
I am keeping track of all incidents. I also make copies of all her work and homework now. Well, I scan it all on to my computer. It's just really sad to have to go through all of this at an elementary school! One good thing is the middle school is totally different. My son has no problems. However, the middle school was not affected by the rezoning.
I'm going to hold out until the end of the first semester. After that, if things haven't calmed down, all gloves are off!
It's a shame that your kids have to be the "trailblazers" here, but I bet you anything the kids are behaving better than the adults.
You probably have more allies than you realize. Mature, intelligent white people don't want this crap going on in their school district, either.
A Black friend moved into a predominantly white town a couple of years ago. The first year they were there, her son got his eighth-grade yearbook, and she was appalled to find that his new friends had written "plantation" jokes in the book. She took it to the principal, but calmly and rationally, and said this was not acceptable. As it turned out, all of the kids, including her own, thought it was just a laughable joke, but she explained to the kids (again, including her own son) and their parents why it was not acceptable to make such jokes. She said she was overwhelmed by how embarrassed the parents were that their kids did this, and that they all turned out to be really nice people--no one told her to get over it or any of the usual lines.
In short, she felt it was the right thing to do to air it all out, but kept to the facts and didn't get angry or emotional when dealing with the problem. Perhaps that's what you'll have to do, as well. And find out who your allies are.
Even cuter situation today. We had a big lunch in the classroom. Everyone was suppose to bring a dish. I found out from my daughter. I still didn't get an email. Of course again I was the only black there. No problem. I'm often in that situation where I live. Just like the other functions I've been too, I was ignored, again. Also, no problem. I tried to join in a few conversations. No luck. Again, no problem. I was there for my daughter. After everything was done, I was helping to clean up. I gathered up my dish (pasta salad). Two ladies approached me to ask what I wanted them to do with the watermelon I brought. They said it was a lot left no one wanted any. First, I didn't bring watermelon. Second, why assume I did. I know, I'm being paranoid. I politely explained the watermelon was not mine and before you ask neither was the fried chicken. I told them the pasta salad, which was all gone, was my dish. They looked at each other and apologized. They began to explain with the words "we assumed". I just smiled and said I know, that's the problem. An Asian woman(not that it matters) brought the watermelon. She was almost too embarrassed to collect it. I finished cleaning. Kissed my daughter and went home.
The good news is when I got home, I had three emails. Two from other parents in the room still apologizing for their ignorance. One inviting me to the next function! I can't wait! I'm hopeful that it will be better.
I am sitting here just shaking my head in disbelief. Except that I believe it. Thank God you have a sense of humor.
This is just me, but you seem to be coming across as someone who is actively looking for racism. You seem to be the angry person who takes offense at any thing and label it as racism whether it is or isn't. If you walk into this situation with a huge chip on your shoulder then that attitude will come across chrystal clear and push people away.
Assuming that the black person at a party was the one who brought the watermelon is racist. Taking offense to such behavior does not mean that she has a chip on her shoulder.
There is not a doubt in my mind that "sailordave" is white.
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