Young Women: Don't be the Only One in the Family Who Cooks

[TabulaRasa]

[quote=gentlearts;28602904]Any woman who is not capable of preparing meals to nurture her family is defective to me.
quote]

I think "defective" is a stretch, but actually, I do agree that any PERSON who isn't capable of preparing food has real problems with basic helplessness. Having the ability to feed yourself nutritiously and in a cost-effective manner is kind of a basic skill.

That said, not having the capability, and simply choosing not to cook are not the same thing.

[CarolinaWoman]

My husband can cook an egg, make a banana sandwich and open a can of something. He does know how to operate the microwave and handles take-out real good. We have two daughters and one son ... one daughter can cook. Other daughter married a guy that cooks as she has no interest in cooking.

But I make sure my son knew how to cook. As he was growing up I would have him in the kitchen working with me ... separating eggs to make meringue for pies, making cornbread and he is now an excellent cook. He married a woman that has no idea how to cook. He cooks and she cleans up the kitchen. He lives 700 miles away and when he comes home he takes over my kitchen.

[LexWest]

Originally Posted by debzkidz

I don't know if you are male or female, old or young, married or single, kids or not and I don't really care, but all I can say is you are reading way more into this than there really is. No one needs any professional help because they think everyone should learn to prepare a meal for themselves.

The point is, at one time, cooking was the woman's job. People married young, often either leaving their parents home, or a college dorm and going straight into marriage, where the wives handled all of the kitchen work. The young men never had to learn to cook their own food. Now days people are often marrying often much older, often waiting until they are in their 30's and plenty are choosing to never marry at all. These young men, and women, need to know how to make a meal for themselves. No one is asking them to make Thanksgiving dinner, just know how to make food in a pinch or be able to feed themselves. What if they never married, are they supposed to live on frozen dinner and take out for their entire lives?

I think you're reading too much into my response. It's merely my .02. I understand it's good for everyone to know to cook, but the other poster was using her case in which the precedent had already been set. It's great to teach kids male and female to cook while they're growing up; but to demand your partner of several years to learn/do something new to them that you knew going into the marriage they weren't good at, isn't that cut and dry. It's like trying to teach an old dog new tricks. There's a reason why younger people are more apt to adapt to changes and try new things while older people won't. When people are young, it's easy to set a standard, but older people get set in their ways and don't just change because you think they should.

[no kudzu]

everybody young and old better learn how to adapt to change. Change is going to happen no matter if you like it or not.

By your logic everybody is "fully cooked" when they get married and to expect any growth or adaptation to the changes life brings is unrealistic. I don't see it that way at all. Who really knows their spouse when they first get married? Even couples who live together before marriage see changes and learn new things about each other.

[LexWest]

Originally Posted by no kudzu

everybody young and old better learn how to adapt to change. Change is going to happen no matter if you like it or not.

By your logic everybody is "fully cooked" when they get married and to expect any growth or adaptation to the changes life brings is unrealistic. I don't see it that way at all. Who really knows their spouse when they first get married? Even couples who live together before marriage see changes and learn new things about each other.

...But you're using your example when you were already aware of the "shortcomings," and expected him change.

I didn't completely disagree with you. People should learn to cook, but like I said, there's a reason older people don't adapt to changes as easily. They don't want to, and you can't make them.

Again, you're obviously a type A person, but recognize not everyone is going to have the same capabilities or the values/desires you have, even if you think they should. You can't expect everyone to think/act the same way you do.

[kelly237]

I think it is usually more about "won't" than "Can't"

There are too many super simple things that take very little skill.
My 10 year old grandson makes chocolate chip pancakes on his own..

Crock pot recipes are simple .. dump things in together and out comes a meal..