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It kind of depends upon whether you are a pain about it, or whether you are silent about it. In other posts I have written about our friends; TPWDLA..the people who don't like anything.
I enjoy cooking for people, but I just don't ever invite them anymore because between the two of them they only like about 4 things. And try going to a restaurant with them. The husband isn't too bad, but the wife will order something, say she doesn't like it and expect to be served something else..there's nothing wrong with it except she doesn't like it.
Furthermore, the wife automatically doesn't like anything she hasn't had before...won't even try it. Her logic is so nonsensical that, for example, she doesn't like lemon, but she likes lemon merangue pie. This type of thing makes it impossible to keep straight her likes and dislikes.
SOOOO, really, nobody cares what you want to eat, or not eat, just please don't make it their problem, and keep it to yourself.
My wife's entire family are picky eaters. I will know longer go to a restaurant with them because all I hear is complaints the entire time. This is after a 45 minute conversation as to were we should go to eat. So many places are eliminated because certain members will only eat certain things. Her 8 year old son can no longer due sleepovers because he requires a special trip to the store to get him something to eat. I can't due family BBQ's for them because it would require to many dishes to make them happy. I know every picky eater is not like this but I will never ever date a picky eater again. I simply takes to much effort to make them happy.
Again, there's nothing at all wrong with being a picky eater. (It's sad, I can say, having been one, and you miss a heck of a lot, but there's nothing really WRONG with it.)
What there's something wrong with is when you make the rest of the world (or anyone who might be cooking something for you) responsible for you being a picky eater.
Again, with the caveat that if there is a real medical reason for not being able to eat something, diagnosed by a legitimate physician, and you share at least the fact that there's a medical reason, you might mention it. But even in that case you still wouldn't get to "vet" the menu that your host would be preparing for you and others, just mention when you accepted that you have this particular condition that precludes you eating this one range of foods, and then graciously eat whatever you can at the dinner.
My wife's entire family are picky eaters. I will know longer go to a restaurant with them because all I hear is complaints the entire time. This is after a 45 minute conversation as to were we should go to eat. So many places are eliminated because certain members will only eat certain things. Her 8 year old son can no longer due sleepovers because he requires a special trip to the store to get him something to eat. I can't due family BBQ's for them because it would require to many dishes to make them happy. I know every picky eater is not like this but I will never ever date a picky eater again. I simply takes to much effort to make them happy.
Your last sentence is the crux of the matter..."It takes too much effort to make them happy". I think this is why picky eaters get treated as if they had the pox. It feels more like a grab for power, control, and attention than just simply a food preference.
First off, let me say that personally I should have elaborated a bit more that *I* really don't consider myself all that "picky" compared to most people classified as that. I know that in my original post I said that I was particular, and had preferences--but in reality, as long as it doesn't have meat (and sometimes I will do seafood), cucumbers, very stong garlic-tasting foods, or things overly vinegar-y, I will usually try it. I absolutely love ethnic food of nearly all kinds, and for me, the spicier--the better.
Anyhow, what I don't/won't eat for me typically revolves around the fact that I get indigestion, and many times IBS-like symptoms from eating foods that are offensive to me. Anything I speak of being "picky" about is based off how I feel after eating it, rather than just that "I don't like what it tastes like."
What sparked me to start this thread was actually due to the fact that my in-laws are visiting me, and that THEY are "picky" eaters. I don't want to bore you with the list of foods that they won't have--but trust me, it's lengthy. Anyhow, even though that's the way they are, and that it sometimes makes dinner a challenge--it doesn't bother me. THAT is why I began the thread. I accept that it's the way they are, and I try to accommodate them as well as I can... and now I've learned even more that it CERTAINLY doesn't seem to bother me as much as some people here.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again. My experiences differ in how people with food preferences are treated in my personal life than what I've seen here on C-D. So, to me, the idea of having such strong hatred for a "picky" eater was new to me, and didn't (and still doesn't, honestly) make much sense.
Also--if anyone here has experienced someone going "yuck" audibly at something you make for them is rude. At that point, it's not even a matter of the person being "picky" but lacking manners. Those of you saying that--have you here honestly found people like that??
My problem is that most picky eaters I run into will only eat like 10 damn things! My sister-n-law has to make 3 different meals every night because her daughter and husband only eat a total of maybe 18 different things. Parents that don't make their children eat a variety of things are the ones that create these picky eaters. I HATED green beans as a child but I wasn't allowed up from the table until they were gone and guess what? I still don't particularly care for green beans but i'll eat them because I know there good for me. Thanks Mom. Most picky eaters I know won't even try different foods so it isn't worth the fight I guess. If you want to only eat pizza and french fries your whole life, go for it.
There are people with preferences and people who are picky. Picky, to me, is offensive.
I cook every chance I get. Now, read this thoroughly before some of you have a cow; I do ask people if they have any allergies or medical issues beforehand. I understand some people have an extreme dislike for certain foods. I do try to make my dishes likeable for most people. However, I am not catering to excessive pickiness or spoiled brats, no matter how old they are. I would say these are the folks who are referred to as "abominations". I'd personally call them "uninvited".
As it pertains to kids, outside of medical issues, I will make one meal and that's it. Again, I will try and make it likeable, but I am not making separate meals for my family. I taught my son to try everything once. There wasn't much he didn't like. That's not to say all kids are the same or that they should like everything, but certainly I don't believe kids are born hating vegetables. Nor are they born with poor manners.
When I have children over, I will not tolerate frowning or causing a scene at the table (or anywhere for that matter). I will politely tell them to relocate to the living room away from my other guests. Mommy and daddy can feed them chicken nuggets and pop tarts for breakfast, lunch and dinner, but it ain't happening at my house. My family knows this and so do my friends. It is rarely an issue anymore, but it can be with someone new to the group.
As to adults, I think it is especially unbecoming. Anyone who says they won't eat something because it's green or looks funny may as well have a pacifier stuck in their mouth and sit in time-out. Those who are really picky should accomodate the host and their guests, not the other way around. If you don't like much of anything, consider that you probably wouldn't make a good dinner guest. Limit yourself to large buffet style gatherings or eat at home.
This is a little off-topic from my original question, but I'm curious...
I've seen you all mention medical reasons as an acceptable reason to be "picky" about what one eats. Just throwing it out there... what if it is for religious and/or moral reasons? The primary reason I don't eat meat is due to digestive issues I get when I do... but what if someone was a vegetarian SOLELY for moral reserves. Is that just foolish?
Or what if someone kept kosher and requested that dairy and meat items be kept separate? Now I know that if you want to get technical, people that truly keep kosher probably wouldn't be eating over at someone's home that doesn't keep kosher already due to mixing of plates and utensils and such--but I just know of a Jewish friend of mine that used to not eat dairy and meat together at the same time, and refrain from pork or shellfish. Would she annoy you in her preferences, or would her "religious" beliefs grant her a reprieve?
This is a little off-topic from my original question, but I'm curious...
I've seen you all mention medical reasons as an acceptable reason to be "picky" about what one eats. Just throwing it out there... what if it is for religious and/or moral reasons? The primary reason I don't eat meat is due to digestive issues I get when I do... but what if someone was a vegetarian SOLELY for moral reserves. Is that just foolish?
Or what if someone kept kosher and requested that dairy and meat items be kept separate? Now I know that if you want to get technical, people that truly keep kosher probably wouldn't be eating over at someone's home that doesn't keep kosher already due to mixing of plates and utensils and such--but I just know of a Jewish friend of mine that used to not eat dairy and meat together at the same time, and refrain from pork or shellfish. Would she annoy you in her preferences, or would her "religious" beliefs grant her a reprieve?
Of course this is totally reasonable. We're talking about people who are just plain rude and offensive, lacking manners and decorum. It's not an all out attack on everyone who doesn't eat everything.
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As to adults, I think it is especially unbecoming. Anyone who says they won't eat something because it's green or looks funny may as well have a pacifier stuck in their mouth and sit in time-out.
I think that kids and eating is a completely different story that could be a whole new thread, which has probably been made 10 times already.
Anyhow, I quoted you above in what you said about adults that are "picky." To be honest with you, my mother in law for example IS a bit "challenging" at times to find food to eat. Usually if we can find a restaurant where things are fried or if they have a cheeseburger then she's happy (it's amazing she's not overweight....).
Regardless, although her "quirks" are at times a bit to deal with, it just doesn't bother me. To each their own. I just don't understand worrying, caring, or really having an opinion about what OTHER people eat. If there is something I love, I assume not everyone loves it--and that it's "their loss" if they don't. To some, food is merely sustenance--a way to live, not something to live for. Granted, I love food, but still...
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