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I don't know where to post this, and I figure this thread will give me the most sympathy, since that's all I really want!
Or, it could go in the moving section, but I will put it here. We moved last April, and I was determined to do a major purge. In the process, I got a little carried away, and got rid of some things I now regret.
I had a huge, and mean huge, pile of table linens. They probably weighed 100 lb+. Look, I never use tablecloths, so, out they go. After all, I had been toting them around 30+ years, most were my mother's stuff. In the process, I tossed donated some vintage stuff from the 50's that I could have sold on Ebay, but just didn't have the time. Oh, well.....those were my mother's things.
But the worse part....I got rid of at least 10 sets of Damask table linens, some with the original labels, some Irish lace with labels. I found later, they were from the Edwardian era, about....1914. That was the year my grandparents were married! They must have been wedding gifts! In the process of doing family genealogy, I realized my GM moved as a young bride from PA to Detroit. She must have packed and taken her treasures with her. I found they lived in 3 different rentals before their "forever" home. I can imagine her keeping her treasures carefully stored, waiting for her home to grace with them. Then, probably, that special occasion just never came along. I do remember my mother claiming them and jealously guarding them. She comingled them with her own linens, etc. I knew they were important but never why.
Years went by, my mother died, and I somehow inherited them. They've been through 10+ moves. They were always something I just packed and dragged along, not something I truly "kept". Ok, like I said, I decided last move was a major purge. "Get Rid of It" became my battle cry! So, out they went....donated to charities, etc. I can only hope someone bought them who appreciated their true value, not just a cheap dining cloth......
I did decide to keep a few, just to keep them, so, guess I have something. If you have something of value and want your children to inherit/value it, please, tell them about it! Don't just keep it stored in the attic, a "big secret"! Studying one's family history bring's an appreciation of such things, just don't let it be too late! I literally felt sick when I discovered what they truly were. Not just "some old stuff from the attic", but a young bride's treasures, taken on what was then a long journey, to her new home. Oh, well, Grandma, I/ve lost your treasures, but gained your story. You weren't always just "Grandma" you were once a young bride with hopes, dreams, and visions of the future!
Alls I can say is you wrote a touching story of your family and sounds alot like stuff my mom and grandmother had saved. We all have given things away to charities and been sad later,but we just cant save everything as you wouldnt have the room over time. Thanks for sharing.
Alls I can say is you wrote a touching story of your family and sounds alot like stuff my mom and grandmother had saved. We all have given things away to charities and been sad later,but we just cant save everything as you wouldnt have the room over time. Thanks for sharing.
Eventually, little by little, the treasures of the past go. Like you say, we simply can't save everything. I think, deep in my heart, I knew they were of some value unknown to me at the time. That's part of the reason I parted with them. This will be our second to last move before retirement, and I didn't want everything to pile up on me for one final decision. If its emotional now, it would be overwhelming later. I guess I just wanted to spread out the pain over time, instead of it being one big hurt.
I wasn't in very good shape when we moved. I was in extreme pain from a bad hip, I later had it replaced after we moved. We had an unreasonable landlord, who wanted us OUT before the end of the month, when we had paid through the end. He put so much pressure on us, along with just the pressure of moving,etc. We rented a 10/10 storage unit which is packed to the gills, despite selling/donating a ton of stuff. I felt I didn't make the best decisions, but not the worse, either.
She is lovely and beautifully dressed. We can't keep everything that belonged to them though. At first we want to cling to all of it but as life goes on, we keep filtering things out and hanging on to those items that we deem most important and significant.
If these things someday act as touchstones for the younger generations so that they, too, start to think about who they are and where they came from, that's a good thing. Sometimes all it takes is an old quilt or a necklace, a sword, a piece of furniture to stimulate someone's curiosity about their family history.
[quote=in_newengland;41962964]She is lovely and beautifully dressed. We can't keep everything that belonged to them though. At first we want to cling to all of it but as life goes on, we keep filtering things out and hanging on to those items that we deem most important and significant.
If these things someday act as touchstones for the younger generations so that they, too, start to think about who they are and where they came from, that's a good thing. Sometimes all it takes is an old quilt or a necklace, a sword, a piece of furniture to stimulate someone's curiosity about their family history.[/quote]
Actually, it was tracing my grandmother's sister that prompted my curiosity. I never knew her married name. In the process, I uncovered a ton of information about my family. Its amazing what's out there if one knows where to look! I always thought they were Irish, actually they were Scottish. I've traced them back to pre-revolution era!
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That was the year my grandparents were married! They must have been wedding gifts! In the process of doing family genealogy, I realized my GM moved as a young bride from PA to Detroit. She must have packed and taken her treasures with her. I found they lived in 3 different rentals before their "forever" home. I can imagine her keeping her treasures carefully stored, waiting for her home to grace with them. Then, probably, that special occasion just never came along. I do remember my mother claiming them and jealously guarding them. She comingled them with her own linens, etc. I knew they were important but never why. 
