Seriously considering moving back to my Home State (jobs, move back, roommates)
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So heres a quick rundown of me. Im a 23 year old single male who moved out when I was 22 in Oct of 2011. I moved from Clifton, NJ in northern NJ in the NYC area to move down to VA. A friend of mine had a good job of mine and offered me a position as one of his assistant managers. I think I was so burned out and so frustrated from so many failures at progressing in NJ that I became bitter and hated the situation I was living in, and had some friends who supported my decision to move and others who flat out told me they would be sad to see me leave.
Fast forward 9 months later and I have never been so depressed and homesick. My family that was somewhat fractured (parents divorced, sister being single mother with douchebag dad , and drama) had me bitter of them as well. But things have changed, drastically. I see my family is so much calmer and together, and my sister and I had always a good relationship, but we never showed much emotion towards each other. Everytime I see her now she gets emotional and hugs me and the other day she randomly texted me saying she missed me. She just doesnt do that, unless somethings bothering her. Im seeing my niece growing up every day as well and when she told me she missed me as well I almost got on my knees from the tears I felt on me.
My job, I wont lie, I think im good at it, not perfect, got some flaws, but I absolutely hate it. I hate working overnight. It didnt help when I moved here during the fall/winter months. I had my car break down and fell into debt quickly. The employees are my job are horrible and were overpaid for 10 years until we got brought in to change the culture of that place. My friend, whos my direct boss, has had moments with me in which, lets just say I got demoralized. I dont blame him going off on my mistakes, since he gets the same amount of heat from his boss , but as much as he welcomes me to visit, Im afraid to see him. Hes married, hes got his house and his wife and is starting his own business as well.
Money was motivating factor, I was an EMT in NJ and was hopping from job to job and somehow not making enough to make ends meet. I moved down here because of stable job with salary and benefits that I have yet to get. I hate it, I know NJ economics arent the best, but I got jobs willing to hire me if I move back there on the spot as well as parts of NYC where I got a friend who has a job offer for me. I miss the big city feel, VA aint cutting it for me. I gotta drive for everything, and its just hard for me to adjust to the culture around here, and as much as Im trying to make it work, I dont feel like this is my spot long time.
I want to quit my job and move back, but it gets so complicated since I told my friend already of my intentions but he told me to think about it twice and not to 'cop out' Im afraid to burn my bridges, but soemetimes failure can be your greatest victory. So my question to you guys is if its worth doing it. My head tells me wait, but when I think of my family and friends, Id move back there tomorrow, knowing I can redeem myself on my past mistakes and be around a very, VERY strong supporting cast of friends and family.
Go with your heart...You're young and family won't always be around and once they're gone, you'll miss them; so enjoy them while you have them!...I moved out of state over a year ago and I want to go back home so bad, it hurts...I hate where I'm living and miss Calif...
Sounds like you need to be where your family is, what's the point of this so called great job if you are miserable and lonely? Were you living with your family before or were you living out on your own? If you were living with your family, maybe you should move back up there but get your own place or live with roommates. Sometimes that changes the dynamics of things if you aren't seeing these people every moment of every day. Or maybe they just needed to get a taste of life without you. Be thankful you have family that love you! Good luck.
Sounds like you need to be where your family is, what's the point of this so called great job if you are miserable and lonely? Were you living with your family before or were you living out on your own? If you were living with your family, maybe you should move back up there but get your own place or live with roommates. Sometimes that changes the dynamics of things if you aren't seeing these people every moment of every day. Or maybe they just needed to get a taste of life without you. Be thankful you have family that love you! Good luck.
I was actually living by myself, I was in a basement apartment and still feeling awkward and though moving out would make things better. It hasnt, this job literally drains the life out of you. I wasnt meant to be a manager, and sometimes the worst thing is biting your toungue and realizing that things didnt go as planned, as far as circumstances and your own actions. Maybe Im meant to be living in a big city atmosphere, I mean I always grew up in that environment. I dont live in the sticks, but this is too much of a black and white setting for me. Living in Northern NJ/ NYC area I felt so comfortable where I was at, and over here the things that people like doing here dont interest me. Im not a Hiker or a camper guy, Im a big city guy trying to find his identity.
You're not burning any bridges if you do things the right way. People quit jobs and move on all the time. Your friend is starting his own business....how long do you think he's going to be there for YOU? How much thought do you think he's giving YOU as he lives his life???
At 23, it's hard to tell an employer, "Sorry, but I've got places to go, people to see, things to do." Take my word for this: You don't owe them anything except maybe 2 weeks notice, and you don't really owe them that; it's just a professional courtesy.
That said, keep in mind that you don't live too far from NJ as it is. If you're better off in VA financially, you might consider staying there. Again, at 23, every little detail seems like a big change. One mile seems like ten. You aren't that far away. Just do what's right for you. If your head says "wait", then wait.
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